Beware Of “I’m Owed This”

Listen to the podcast of this post by clicking on the player below, and you can also subscribe on AppleSpotify, or Audible. 

On Mother’s Day, I shared a word of encouragement from a woman who interacted with the prophet Elisha. As I was studying for this message, I paused to consider an example—actually a warning—that comes from Elisha’s servant Gehazi. 

Because of the miraculous things that God had done through Elisha, word began to spread about God’s power that was on display through this godly prophet. In fact, word even spread to other countries, including the land of Aram where was a highly decorated military commander named Naaman lived. This revered leader was afflicted by leprosy. The king of Aram sent Naaman to Elisha to be cured of this disease (see 2 Kings 5). 

When Naaman came to Elisha, he was given instructions to bathe himself seven times in the Jordan River. Initially, Naaman balked at this, but eventually, he humbled himself in obedience and was miraculously healed of his leprosy! 

Naaman had come to Israel and Elisha with the intention of buying a miracle (just take a look at the treasures that he brought with him). Elisha would not accept money or gifts from Naaman. Not that there’s anything wrong with a prophet receiving gifts, but not when the intention of the giver is to give a bribe. 

This is where Gehazi makes a fatal mistake. Gehazi has a conversation with himself (notice the phrase “he said to himself”) that he should have had with Elisha. He determined that he and Elisha were owed something for their ministry work. Gehazi then compounded this unhealthy conversation by telling one lie after another lie to justify the conclusion he had reached. 

Elisha knew that God keeps track, that God keeps perfect records, that God will reward far better than any man ever could. He said, “Is this the time to take money or to accept clothes?” No! We need to let God determine the timing and the gift. 

As a result, the leprosy that had left Naaman now attacked Gehazi. In reality, it was a leprosy of his heart that merely appeared on his skin. Gehazi was then dismissed from his ministry position with Elisha. 

Sadly, I’ve witnessed many ministry leaders who have derailed their leadership with an “I deserve this” attitude. Thinking “I’m owed this” took their eyes off God and put them on the rewards they thought they should have received. How sad this is! 

We all need to be on guard. The “I’m owed this” lie didn’t just derail Gehazi, it’s also what turned Lucifer into satan. Is it any wonder, then, that satan uses this lying attitude as an effective weapon—from Adam and Eve, to King David, to Gehazi, to Ananias and Sapphira, all the way down to us. 

Our constant prayer should be, “Holy Spirit, guard my heart against the leprosy of entitlement. Help me keep the ‘I’m owed this’ attitude far, far away from my heart’s door.” 

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Links & Quotes

Our negative self-told can limit our lives. If you’re a leader, your negative self-talk is putting a life on how well and how far you can lead. Check out this full episode from The Craig And Greg Show. And be sure to check out all of my videos on my YouTube channel.

“Courage is the mastery of fear, not the absence of fear.” —Mark Twain

“A good man leaves an inheritance to his children’s children…” (Proverbs 13:22). In his excellent book Proverbs: Amplified and Applied, my cousin Dick Brogden uses our grandfather as an example of the principle in this verse: “Good has multi-generational implications. My grandfather was an incredibly generous man, and his children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren have reaped the benefit. I am convinced that one of the reasons my family is so generously provided for is because our ancestor repeatedly gave significant financial gifts to his church, the Billy Graham Association, and missionaries around the world. Contrary to Shakespeare’s pessimism in the mouth of Mark Antony, the good that men do does indeed live after them, it is not interred with their bones.”

Self-care is vital. Without taking care of yourself first, how will you have any strength to take care of others? To Write Love On Her Arms has a helpful list of self-care items you can do in just 20 minutes per day.

“Knowledge follows understanding. We invert it and think that if we know facts, we are wise. In reality, it is only the wise who can rightly interpret the facts. … There is a posture of humility before God that opens the lowly to the understanding of God. This spirit of understanding becomes the filter with which we sift facts. Facts sifted by understanding lead us to accurate knowledge. Scoffers reject the reality that they need God’s help and God’s Spirit to understand facts. They foolishly think that true knowledge can be gained outside divinely enabled understanding. They have earned their PhD in ultimate idiocy.” —Dick Brogden, in ‘Proverbs: Amplified and Applied’ commenting on Proverbs 14:6

Refusing To Be Controlled By Fear

Listen to the podcast of this post by clicking on the player below, and you can also subscribe on Apple or Spotify.

The Lord is my light and my salvation—whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life—of whom shall I be afraid? (Psalm 27:1)

How many of my daily choices are affected by fear?

  • whether to try something new or to stick with what’s familiar?
  • should I confront a friend on a bad choice or let him figure it out on his own?
  • to spend money or to invest it for later? what do I buy? where do I invest?
  • what if people don’t like what I do or say? what if they talk behind my back?

David begins this psalm with the same kinds of questions, as he battles enemies surrounding him, the possibility of his family rejecting him, false witnesses speaking lies against him, and foes closing in from every side. 

In the middle of all of these swirling issues, David exhibits a confidence that starkly stands out:

  • whom shall I fear?
  • of whom shall I be afraid?
  • my heart will not fear
  • I will be confident
  • I am still confident

How can David respond this way? He kept turning his thoughts from the temporal to the eternal—

It may seem dark now, but God is light.

People may be fickle, but God is unchanging.

Foes may be strong, but God is the strongest.

People are mean, but God is good.

Both David’s opening and closing thoughts in this psalm are really a conversation with himself: The Lord is my light and my salvation—whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life—of whom shall I be afraid? … I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord. (vv. 1, 13, 14)

My friends, don’t let fear drive your decisions. Let confidence in God drive your decisions. Talk back to your fearful thoughts like David did and remind them of the great and loving God that cares for you. Don’t take matters into your own hand, but wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord. 

I used Psalm 27 as a teaching example of how to turn passages from the Bible into our own personalized prayers. Check out this 5-minute video here:

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Abundant Bravery

“I am grabbing all you fears by the jugular because I know you are my everyday enemy. You fears are too often my cancer, my addiction, my hidden habit. You’re my jailer, my poison, my daily blade of self-harm. You’ve been my anesthetic, the thing I’ve let come freeze me every day, lock me up, and suck away my life. You’ve snuffed out my soul while you kept on breathing for years. You’re the most common brain tumor, always beginning in our minds.

“You fears may think you can divide us and conquer us and imprison us in small places, in small lives, with high fences that keep out hope and possibility and each other and the lives we really want. But you don’t know how we’re seeing things.

“You may think you can make us cynical about dreams and apathetic about hope and dubious about possibility and people and prospects. But we’re all over you: you aren’t meant to drive our lives; you’re meant to teach us something about life. You’re a chameleon that wears a thousand different masks, and there are ways to see the realest, truest, surest things.

“You can sound loud or you can strut about and rant like pride. You can grow deathly quiet and look like numbness or apathy or indifference or a dream running in the wrong direction.

“But the thing is: When I find my fears, I find my idols. When I find where you lurk, I will look you in the eye until I know your realest name. And I will say your name out loud. …

“So I will go on crushing all of your life-absorbing fears to a fine powder because this is the deal: I want to be better at letting go of you than letting go of joy. I don’t have to worry about what’s up ahead because Christ is the head of everything. And I don’t have to fear what’s around the next corner because Christ is already there too. 

“We don’t have to abide in our fears because we can abide in our Father.

“There’s believing it and then there’s abundantly living it: Fear is a liar, and love hands out keys. Love is infinite and love can’t ever end, and if love doesn’t run out, what is there ever to fear? There will still be love when the worst happens and when the hope doesn’t happen. There will still be love when everything is crumbling, and there will be enough love to rebuild. There will still be enough love to keep breathing, to keep believing, to keep being and being brave.

“For this I know: Fear can be what we feel, but brave is what we do.” —Ann Voskamp, The Way Of Abundance

Check out some other quotes from Ann’s amazing book here, here, and here.

7 Quotes From “Whisper”

Mark Batterson’s newest book—Whisper—is all about learning to hear what God is speaking to you. Check out my review of Whisper by clicking here.

“Is God’s voice the loudest voice in your life? That’s the question. If the answer is no, that’s the problem.”

“If you aren’t willing to listen to everything God has to say, eventually you won’t hear anything He has to say.”

“When someone speaks in a whisper, you have to get very close to hear. … And that’s what God wants.”

“God is great not just because nothing is too big; God is great because nothing is too small. God doesn’t just know you by name; He has a unique name for you. And He speaks a language that is unique to you.”

“We worry way too much about what people think, which is evidence that we don’t worry enough about what God thinks. It’s the fear of people that keeps us from hearing and heeding the voice of God. We let the expectations of others override the desires God has put in our hearts.”

“Every thought that fires across our eighty-six billion neurons is a tribute to the God who knit us together in our mothers’ wombs. But when we have a thought that is better than our best thoughts on our best day, it might be from God. That doesn’t make it equal with Scripture, but it’s a step above a ‘good idea.’ Is it easy differentiating between good ideas and God ideas? No, it’s not. And again, even what we perceive to be God ideas must be screened by Scripture. But when God gives us ideas that we don’t believe originated with us, we must be careful to give credit where credit is due. And it’s our job to take those thoughts captive and make them obedient to Christ.”

“If your life is off-key, maybe it’s because you’ve been deafened by the negative self-talk that doesn’t let God get a word in edgewise. Maybe you’ve listened to the voice of shame so long that you can’t believe anything else about yourself. Or maybe it’s the enemy’s voice of condemnation that speaks lies about who you really are.”

More quotes from Whisper coming soon!

12 Quotes From “JumpStart Your Growth”

JumpStart Your GrowthJumpStart Your Growth is a companion book to The 15 Invaluable Laws Of Growth by John Maxwell. Check out my review of both of these books by clicking here. These are some of the quotes I appreciated from JumpStart.

“The time comes when you need to stop waiting for the man you want to become and start being the man you want to be.” —Bruce Springsteen

“Growing involves admitting you don’t have the answers, and it requires that you get over any fear you may have of making mistakes or looking foolish. And I found that I had to get started if I wanted to find the best way. That is the price of admission if you want to improve.” —John Maxwell

“If you want to get from where you are to where you want to be, you have to start by becoming aware of the choices that lead you away from your desired destination.” —Darren Hardy

“No factor is more important in people’s psychological development and motivation than the value judgments they make about themselves. Every aspect of their lives is impacted by the way they see themselves.” —Nathaniel Branden

“You need to learn to become your own encourager. Every time you do a good job, don’t just let it pass; give yourself a compliment. Every time you choose discipline over indulgence, don’t tell yourself that you should have anyway; recognize how much you are helping yourself. Every time you make a mistake, don’t bring up everything that’s wrong with yourself; tell yourself that you’re paying the price for growth and that you will learn to do better next time. Every positive thing you can say to yourself will help.” —John Maxwell 

“Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does.” —William James

“If there is an area in your life that seems overwhelming to you—health, work, family, or something else—try chipping away at it a little bit every day instead of trying to tackle it all at once. … Discipline is a morale builder. Boost yours by taking small steps that will take you in a positive direction.” —John Maxwell 

“At the end of each day, you should play back the tapes of your performance. The results should either applaud you or prod you.” —Jim Rohn

“There are two primary choices in life: to accept conditions as they exist, or to accept the responsibility for changing them.” —Denis Waitley 

“Rarely does a haphazard approach to anything succeed, and if it does, it’s not repeatable.” —John Maxwell

“Train yourself to fight for positive changes. Remember that your choices will lead to either the pain of self-discipline or the pain of regret.” —John Maxwell

“You can’t improve and avoid change at the same time.” —John Maxwell

10 Quotes On Emotional Health From “Brain Savvy-Leaders”

Brain-Savvy LeadersOur emotions start in our brain. Charles Stone wrote a very helpful book called Brain-Savvy Leaders, in which he covers a lot of ground inside our heads. One aspect is our emotional health. I encourage you to read my review of this book by clicking here. Below are some quotes Charles shared on our emotional health.

“Gratefulness is actually good for brain and body health.” 

“When the emotionality of leaders takes over, they compromise their ability to lead well in these ways:

  • impulse can overwhelm intention
  • imagination gets pushed aside by instinct
  • defensiveness stifles healthy positions
  • automatic behavior shuts down reflective thought
  • emotionality gets in the way of intentionality.”

“Fear, conscious and unconscious, is prompted by the amygdala. The brain naturally focuses on problems and the negative. It overestimates threats and underestimates opportunities. In fact, two-thirds of the brain cells in our amygdala are primed for negativity and fear. Negative networks in our brain outweigh positive ones by five to one. And negative emotions are more easily consolidated (made more permanent) into our long-term memory than positive emotions.”

“Fear can even be subconscious, especially if we’re surrounded by bad news, critical people, or if our self-talk is constantly negative.”

“Neuroscientists have found that stuffing, denying, or a ignoring our emotions reinforces them, affects short-term memory, increases blood pressure, and robs our brain’s prefrontal cortex of the mental energy it needs.”

“Although it may seem counterintuitive, tagging your emotions, through labeling and naming them by putting feelings into words, actually recruits our impulse break and dampens activity in our panic alarm.”

“Anger is the wind that blows out the lamp of the mind.” —Chinese Proverb

“Since our brains process and remember bad events more thoroughly than good ones…it’s vital that we develop the discipline of being aware of our thoughts. … Thinking about our thinking is called ‘metacognition.’”

“Emotions play a significant role in decision-making and influence how well your team will embrace change. Just presenting facts without engaging positive and hopeful emotions will seldom move your team forward. The brain can only handle so much change at once. Trying to create too much change too quickly can engage the brain’s fear center and cause an away response, thus hindering change.”

“In one research study in Israel, Dr. Tal Shafir looked at the impact of movement on the brain of twenty-two young male and female participants. They looked at video clips of actors performing various emotions that corresponded to sad, fearful, happy, or neutral. Happy movements included raising their arms in the air, skipping, and jumping. Sad movements included closing their chests and slumping forward. The participants then either mimicked the movements or imagined themselves doing them. The emotions they reported mirrored the corresponding movements. So, if you need a mood boost, keep a good posture or throw your arms up and out into the air.”

Previously I shared some other quotes from this book on how we learn, and on how to keep our brain healthy. Please check these out too.

Getting Out Of A Pit

This guy was having a bad day (or maybe a bad week, a bad month, a bad year…). The bottom line: he was in a pit, and it appears he had been in it for some time.

Nothing was going right.

And it didn’t appear things would turn around anytime soon.

He cried out, “My tears have been my food day and night, while men say to me all day long, ‘Where is your God?’” (Psalm 42:3)

Ever been there?

Are you there now?

If so, follow the example of this psalmist as he began to talk to himself…

Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise Him again—my Savior and my God! (v. 5)

Why could he put his hope in God at such a dark time in his life? Consider these wise words from Charles Spurgeon—

“Speak to thy soul thus, ‘If I were dealing with a man’s promise, I should carefully consider the ability and the character of the man who had covenanted with me. So with the promise of God; my eye must not be so much fixed upon the greatness of the mercy—that may stagger me; as upon the greatness of the Promiser—that will cheer me. My soul, it is God, even thy God, God that cannot lie, Who speaks to thee. This word of His which thou art now considering is as true as His own existence. He is a God unchangeable. He has not altered the thing which has gone out of His mouth, nor called back one single consolatory sentence. Nor doth He lack any power; it is the God that made the heavens and the earth who has spoken thus. Nor can He fail in wisdom as to the time when He will bestow the favors, for He knoweth when it is best to give and when better to withhold. Therefore, seeing that it is the word of a God so true, so immutable, so powerful, so wise, I will and must believe the promise.’ If we thus meditate upon the promises, and consider the Promiser, we shall experience their sweetness, and obtain their fulfillment.”

If you are in a pit, begin to recall the promises listed in God’s Word.

Pray them.

Meditate on them.

Speak them out loud.

Hang on to them.

“If we thus meditate upon the promises, and consider the Promiser, we shall experience their sweetness, and obtain their fulfillment.”

What Are You Whispering?

Wise King Solomon gave us this advice:

Never say anything that isn’t true. Have nothing to do with lies and misleading words. (Proverbs 4:24)

Most decent people don’t have an issue with this one. We would never dream of whispering to someone we care about things like…

  • …you’re a loser.
  • …you can’t seem to do anything right.
  • …hey, stupid, nice job. Not!

But the verse just before says this:

Be careful how you think; your life is shaped by your thoughts. (v. 23)

I wonder how many times we whisper words like loser, failure, or stupid to ourselves. The things we’d never say to someone else, we seem all too ready to say to ourselves!

What are you whispering to yourself? Listen closely. Are you whispering things to yourself that you would never whisper to someone else? Then it’s time to start whispering something new.

Solomon preceded this with these words of affection that seem to come right from our Heavenly Father’s mouth:

My child, pay attention to what I say. Listen to my words. Never let them get away from you. Remember them and keep them in your heart. (vv. 20-21)

God’s Spirit will never, ever, EVER speak cutting, hurtful, unkind, or untrue words to you. God loves you as if you were the only person on earth to love! He loves you so much that He sent His Son to rescue you.

Listen closely because He’s saying it right now, “I love you!

Yeah, whisper that to yourself instead!

Good For What?

Listen to the podcast of this post by clicking on the player below, and you can also subscribe on AppleSpotify, or Audible.

There is a power in what we say. This is probably most true in what we say to ourselves.

Far too many people are so quick to beat themselves up and run themselves down. Do you ever do that?

  • How could I have missed that? I’m so stupid!
  • Grrr! I forgot my wallet again. I’m so forgetful!
  • I can’t believe I said that! I’m so insensitive!
  • I could never paint like that. I’m so uncreative!
  • I really messed that one up. I’m such an idiot!
  • I can’t seem to do anything right. I’m just a good-for-nothing!

If you talked to your friends the same way you talk to yourself, would you have any friends left?

The things you say to yourself have got to change. The way you think about yourself has got to change.

God made you the way He made you on purpose. In all of human history, there has never been another you. Right now among the nearly 7 billion people on earth, there isn’t anyone like you.

You are you because God made you. He loves what He made. He loves you!

Perfect? No way! None of us are. That’s one of the few things you and I have in common with everyone else.

Unique? You better believe it!

One of a kind? You sure are!

Good for something? Yep! You have the talents and abilities and personality and temperament that God intended for you to have.

STOP BEATING YOURSELF UP!

Look into God’s mirror and let Him reflect back to you just how wonderful you are! Spend quiet time with your Creator, with your Lover. Hear Him whisper to your heart how special you are.

Then be you. The world needs you to be you. The world is a better place with you in it.

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