Serve More To Lead Better

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As King Solomon’s son Rehoboam was ascending the throne, he received some wise counsel:

If you will be a servant to these people and serve them and give them a favorable answer, they will always be your servants.

I also like the way The Message paraphrases this same verse:

If you will be a servant to this people, be considerate of their needs and respond with compassion, work things out with them, they’ll end up doing anything for you.

In other words: the more you serve, the better you will lead. Unfortunately, Rehoboam chose to reject this counsel, and his leadership disintegrated.

If you will be a servant [position] and serve [attitude] they will serve you.

This Hebrew word for serve is used quite a bit in the Old Testament. Interestingly, the first five times it is used are all in the agricultural sense: farming the land, tending to the plants, working, waiting, and ultimately harvesting. Leadership is never developed quickly. Servant leaders must be in it for the long haul.

Jesus also emphasized servant-leadership…

But among you it will be different. Whoever wants to be a leader among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first among you must be the slave of everyone else.

Bottom line: The more you serve others, the better you will lead others. 

I take a deep dive into this kind of leadership in my book Shepherd Leadership.

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Others First

Listen to the podcast of this post by clicking on the player below, and you can also subscribe on Apple, Spotify, or Audible.

I have a friend who has a photo album on Facebook called “Me.” The description says, “Sometimes it is just all about me.” And, sure enough, all of the pictures in that album are just her. I know her well enough to know that this is tongue-in-cheek, because she is not a self-absorbed prima donna.

Sadly, some Christian leaders exhibit the It’s-All-About-Me attitude. This really irks me, especially because we see the exact opposite characteristic in Jesus.

Let me key in on just one example from His public ministry. John the baptizer has just been martyred by King Herod. John was Jesus’ cousin. I’m not sure if you’ve ever had a loved one martyred or even murdered, but I’m sure we’ve all lost a loved one at some point. It might be a little easier to take if we saw it coming, but the sudden deaths always jar us the most. We have to have time to grieve our loss.

Jesus had all of the same emotional responses that you and I have, and He wanted some time away to grieve. He got into a boat with His disciples and headed to a remote place on the other side of the lake. Looking for a little time alone to grieve the death of His cousin, Jesus was met by a huge crowd. He would have been perfectly justified in saying, “Not today.” Or even in saying, “I’m going to let My disciples pray with you today.” Instead, Jesus put the needs of others first.

  • Jesus healed all who were sick
  • He taught them
  • Then He provided food for the nearly 10,000 people who were there
  • After the meal, Jesus sent His disciples (who also needed some grieving time) back across the lake without Him
  • Jesus stayed behind and dismissed the entire crowd. I sort of imagine Him hugging people, shaking hands, and continuing to listen to the questions and concerns of everyone

It was only after this that Jesus went up into the hills to spend some time alone in prayer.

Yes, leaders have to take care of themselves and their people. But good leaders take care of others first.

I unpack this idea in even great detail in my book Shepherd Leadership. If you want to be used as a leader, you must allow the Holy Spirit to cultivate this others-first attitude in you.

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Reaction Action

“Action has killed its thousands. Reaction its tens of thousands.” —E. Stanley Jones

  • Yes, he pulled out in front of you [action], but is tailgating him any better [reaction]?
  • Sure, she embarrassed you [action], but is slandering her any better [reaction]?
  • Yep, he lied to you [action], but is harboring a lifelong grudge any better [reaction]?
  • Okay, she tripped you [action], but is slapping her any better [reaction]?
  • That pastor betrayed your confidence [action], but is assassinating his character any better [reaction]?

“Vengeance is a passion to get even. It is a hot desire to give back as much pain as someone gave you. … The problem with revenge is that it never gets what it wants; it never evens the score. Fairness never comes. The chain reaction set off by every act of vengeance always takes its unhindered course. It ties both the injured and the injurer to an escalator of pain. Both are stuck on the escalator as long as parity is demanded, and the escalator never stops, never lets anyone off.” —Lewis Smedes

“But I tell you not to try to get even with a person who has done something to you. When someone slaps your right cheek, turn and let that person slap your other cheek.” —Jesus Christ

Good For What?

Listen to the podcast of this post by clicking on the player below, and you can also subscribe on Apple, Spotify, or Audible.

There is a power in what we say. This is probably most true in what we say to ourselves.

Far too many people are so quick to beat themselves up and run themselves down. Do you ever do that?

  • How could I have missed that? I’m so stupid!
  • Grrr! I forgot my wallet again. I’m so forgetful!
  • I can’t believe I said that! I’m so insensitive!
  • I could never paint like that. I’m so uncreative!
  • I really messed that one up. I’m such an idiot!
  • I can’t seem to do anything right. I’m just a good-for-nothing!

If you talked to your friends the same way you talk to yourself, would you have any friends left?

The things you say to yourself have got to change. The way you think about yourself has got to change.

God made you the way He made you on purpose. In all of human history, there has never been another you. Right now among the nearly 7 billion people on earth, there isn’t anyone like you.

You are you because God made you. He loves what He made. He loves you!

Perfect? No way! None of us are. That’s one of the few things you and I have in common with everyone else.

Unique? You better believe it!

One of a kind? You sure are!

Good for something? Yep! You have the talents and abilities and personality and temperament that God intended for you to have.

STOP BEATING YOURSELF UP!

Look into God’s mirror and let Him reflect back to you just how wonderful you are! Spend quiet time with your Creator, with your Lover. Hear Him whisper to your heart how special you are.

Then be you. The world needs you to be you. The world is a better place with you in it.

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High Five Etiquette

I’m sharing this as a public service announcement because some people really need help in this important social area. You know who you are…

An Extra Hour Of Sleep

I’m a morning person. I absolutely love getting up early and spending some quiet time alone with my Bible. This is the time of day I most absorb all that God is saying to me. It’s my most creative time too. In fact, I so love getting up early that most mornings I’m awake before my alarm clock goes off.

But not this morning.

Today my alarm clock began playing Way-FM and I felt like I was in a fog. It took me a minute or so to even open my eyes and sit up.

I was about to press ahead with my morning, when I thought, “I should sleep some more.”

You see, I’ve learned a few things about myself. When I’m tired…

  • I have a shorter attention span.
  • I’m not as creative.
  • I’m not as patient.
  • I am more prone to give in to temptation.
  • I make decisions that are too short-sighted.
  • I’m more susceptible to colds and flu.

So I re-set the alarm and slept another hour.

Sometimes a little extra sleep is one of the most important things you can do to improve your physical health, your emotional stamina, and your spiritual maturity.

UPDATE: In my book Shepherd Leadership: The Metrics That Really Matter I have five chapters about a leader’s health—mental, physical, spiritual, and emotional health is vital to a leader’s effectiveness and longevity.

What A Dream!

I have just been listening to Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.’s incredible I Have A Dream speech. If ever there was a man who could cast a compelling vision, it was Dr. King. Look at his pattern—

  • He had a noble cause.
  • He stated the problem first: “One hundred years later” there is still racial injustice.
  • He articulated the righteousness of the pursuit of justice and equality.
  • He set the criteria: “We will not be satisfied until justice rolls down like waters.”
  • He encouraged his audience to press on.
  • He brought his vision to a dramatic conclusion with the portable and memorable rally cry: “I HAVE A DREAM!“

Powerful! Watch it again for yourself…

“And Then He Died…”

Listen to the podcast of this post by clicking on the player below, and you can also subscribe on Apple, Spotify, or Audible.

That’s the end of his life. All those years living and that’s all his obituary says: “and then he died.”

Genesis 5 is the lineage of Adam. A mind-numbing list of names and years scroll by:

  • Adam lived 930 years, and then he died.
  • His son Seth lived 912 years, and then he died.
  • His son Enosh lived 905 years, and then he died.
  • His son Kenan lived 910 years, and then he died.
  • His son Mahalalel lived 895 years, and then he died.
  • His son Jared lived 962 years, and then he died.
  • And on and on and on….

For each man we hear the name of one of his sons and how long he lived, but nothing more. Like a modern-day tombstone:

Birth Date─Death Date

The dash between the dates covers childhood, schooling, marriage, inventions, parenthood, and so many other things. But years later, more and more of the details are forgotten and only the dash remains to represent the sum total of the deceased’s life.

And then comes Enoch.

All of the same details are there. Well, except for the “and then he died” epitaph. But actually, there’s so much more. Instead of a death, there’s a phrase that appears only for him: “Enoch walked with God.” The phrase literally means “to be continually conversant.”

Because Enoch lived this way, he didn’t really die. Instead, “He was no more.” He wasn’t here any longer because he is still walking with God. What an incredible blessing to his future generations! He was a blessing while he was alive, and he continues to be a blessing after he is no more.

Enoch’s tombstone reads differently from everyone else. The birth date is there, the dash is there, but instead of “and then he died” we read “he was no more.”

It’s the way I would want my tombstone to read:

Craig T. Owens

1966─He walked with God─He was no more (because he is still walking with God)

In The Seven Habits Of Highly Effective People, Stephen Covey suggests living my life today consistent with what I would like said at my own funeral. It starts with a decision: “Today I will be continually conversant with God.” Then at my funeral, they can say of me, like the Bible says of Enoch: “He didn’t die. He’s just not here any longer. He is walking with God in heaven, just like he walked with Him here on earth.”

What do you want said about your dash?

Do you want your life to simply end with “and then he died”? Do you want something more?

Make your dash a continual conversation, a daily walk with God, and all of your future generations won’t see just a dash, they’ll remember “He is no more. He walked with God, and he is still walking with God!”

Start walking today!

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Joker One (book review)

At first glance, Donovan Campbell’s narrative of his time in Ramadi, Iraq, might seem like a typical war story. But, as the old cliché says, you cannot judge a book by its cover.

Joker One is the name of a United States Marine Corps platoon. But Joker One the book is really more about leadership. Lieutenant Campbell leads us through his day-by-day struggles to lead his men to success. Along the way he has to do the full 360-leadership cycle: leading up with his commanding officers; leading sideways with other commissioned officers; and lead leading down with his squad leaders. Along the way he discovers something remarkable: his Marines are great leaders themselves.

Lt. Campbell sees his men grow in their own leadership skills under his mentorship. He finds his strength in them. He carries a heavy leadership load until his men have to carry him. It reminded me so much of the leadership principles that others have postulated for the board room, but the Marines of Joker One make them happen on the battlefield.

This is a gripping story. Some of the battle scenes are gritty, and some of the language is a little rough (this is probably a PG-13 book). The love and respect that develops between this officer and his men is an amazing study in leadership. It’s also a book about decision-making under fire, the consequences of those decisions, pain, redemption, faith.

I cried and I cheered while reading this book. I hold the members of our military in very high esteem. This book raised my level of respect for our airmen, sailors, soldiers, and Marines even higher. You will be challenged and stirred by the exploits of Joker One.

My New Club

The newest member of the Junky Car Club

The newest member of the Junky Car Club

I like my car. It’s a 1992 Pontiac Bonneville. This is the second Bonneville I’ve owned. I bought my first one with 70,000 miles and put 130,000 miles on it. I bought my second Bonneville with 100,000 miles on it, and I’m now up to 175,000 miles.

It’s running like a top. But it’s now officially a member of the Junky Car Club.

This club was started by a pastor who was concerned about how much money Christians were spending to keep up appearances. Like somehow a good-looking, new-fangled, gadget-laden, brand-spanking-new car signaled to everyone that we were successful.

Successful, maybe, but also spending a lot of money to make sure everyone knows how successful we are (or pretend to be). So instead of spending the money on the car payments, why not keep the older car and then be able to give more money to worthwhile charities? Great concept! Here is JCC founder Mike Foster explaining the idea behind this club.

My car may rattle a bit, and the trunk leaks when it rains, and the interior dome light doesn’t come on when I open the door, and the coat hanger in the back seat is broken. But I hate having car payments, and my car is running just fine. I joined the JCC because I love what they stand for, and I want to identify with them.

If your car is older and you’re contemplating a shiny-new car, I would ask you to consider joining the JCC with me. The money you’ll be saving on car payments, that you can give away, can make a huge difference in others’ lives.