Do You Speak “Teen-ese”?

May 4, 2011 — Craig T. Owens

I highly respect the work that Dr. Tim Elmore does with teenagers. Since I have two teenagers in my home, one of his latest blog posts about communicating with teens caught my attention. He asked 16- to 24-year-olds their preferred method of communication. Their response:

1. Text messaging

2. Internet (i.e. Facebook.com)

3. iPods and Podcasts

4. Instant messaging

5. Cell phone

6. DVD / CD

7. Books

8. Email

Email is last? Yep! Not only last, but described by one teen as the method for communicating with “old people.”

Ouch!

But as a parent, if I truly want to communicate with my teenagers, I have to learn to speak Teen-ese. It’s selfish of me to try to ask my teenager to communicate the way I’m most comfortable (that would be email, if you hadn’t guessed). If I’m going to get their attention, I need to speak the way they speak.

Paul wrote to the church in Corinth that he did the same thing. He said, “I try to find common ground with everyone.” Paul’s native language—his most comfortable language—would have been speaking to Jews in the synagogue about Christ fulfilling Old Testament law.

But he stretched himself. He learned to speak to non-Jews … to those who knew nothing about the Hebrew Old Testament … to those who worshipped idols … to those who were humanistic philosophers … to soldiers … to slaves … to government officials … to everyone.

Parents, don’t try to make your teenagers talk to you in your comfortable language.

Learn Teen-ese. Make it a goal to understand them, instead of trying to make them understand you. By this, you will show your love and earn their ear.

(Watch for a review on Dr. Elmore’s latest book—Generation iY—coming later this week.)

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Sin

December 21, 2010 — Craig T. Owens

I know in politically correct circles it’s not very chic to talk about sin. After all, we’re not supposed to impose our personal values on someone else, right?

Well, I do believe in right and wrong, and the wrong is called sin. So if you are offended by me calling something sin, it would be best for you to stop reading now.

Are you still with me? Then read this: satan…incited David to sin… (1 Chronicles 21:1).

Incited means this wasn’t a straight-up fight. Sin seldom makes a bold, in-your-face attack. Sin isn’t really an ambush. It’s sort of a whispering campaign.

  • Sin is an appeal to ego
  • Sin is a half-truth
  • Sin is an attempt to be subtle
  • Sin is so innocent looking

The Bible says satan lurks like a lion in the underbrush (1 Peter 5:8).

He waits for the perfect opportunity to strike (Luke 4:13).

satan is sneaky (Genesis 3:1).

He lies (John 8:44).

He distorts the truth (Luke 4:9-11).

That’s why I cannot give sin an inch. I have to take every thought captive (2 Corinthians 10:5), and pull everything into the light of The Truth (John 3:20-21).

[Check out all of these verses by clicking here]

It’s not usually the blatant sin that brings down great men and women, but the subtle. So stay on your guard. Always!

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Responding For Those Who Can’t

November 3, 2010 — Craig T. Owens

Do you know what empathy is? It’s not the same thing as sympathy. Sympathy is just wallowing with someone who is hurting, but empathy goes beyond that. Empathy is a compound word:

em- + -pathos = joined + feeling 

I feel what you feel, but I can respond like you should even when you think you can’t.

Sometimes people get paralyzed by their deep hurts, or crushing depression, or infuriating anger. Someone in sympathy feels the pain, the depression, the anger, but their involvement stops at the feeling stage.

Someone in empathy feels the hurt AND responds in an appropriately healthy way.

Check out what Paul wrote:

Who is weak without my feeling that weakness? Who is led astray, and I do not burn with anger? (New Living Translation)

When someone gets to the end of his rope, I feel the desperation in my bones. When someone is duped into sin, an angry fire burns in my gut. (The Message)

Paul took those feelings his friends and loved ones were experiencing and he turned them into positive action. This is challenging and desperately needed.

Sympathy is easy; empathy is hard work.

Sympathy keeps people paralyzed; empathy helps them move forward.

Sympathy enables people to remain unchanged; empathy gives people a healthy way to respond.

If you want to help your hurting, discouraged, or angry friend, don’t sympathize with her hurt, empathize to help her heal. By responding in a healthy way—a way she isn’t able to yet—and you will help her move to a place of wholeness.

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Encouraging Presence

November 1, 2010 — Craig T. Owens

Have you ever been down in the dumps? Ever been discouraged or blue? Have you ever felt like no one gets you? In those moments, have you asked God for encouragement?

The Apostle Paul was feeling a little down, and he asked God to send him encouragement. God answered this way…

But God, who encourages those who are discouraged, encouraged us by the arrival of Titus.

Paul says in the next verse, Titus’ presence was a joy.

This word for encourage simply means showing up for a friend. Do you realize you could be a huge source of encouragement to someone just by showing up?

“A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.” —Walter Winchell

Who needs you to just show up by their side today? Just by showing up, you could be the answer to someone’s desperate prayer for encouragement.

Go, be there for a friend!

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Less Giving = Less Good News

October 25, 2010 — Craig T. Owens

We just finished talking about what the Bible says about tithes and offerings at Calvary Assembly of God. Right on the heels of this, I noticed this article in the Grand Rapids Press: “Study reveals church giving at lowest point since Great Depression.”

Here are some of the sad findings:

  • Regular church attendees aren’t even tithing. The average giving is only 2.4% of the attendees’ income.
  • While giving to churches is down, giving to other faith-based organizations is up.
  • The study’s authors noted a “long-term turning inward of congregations.” In other words, of the money that is given to churches, less and less of it is going to needs outside of the church’s walls.
  • Church’s spending on benevolence has dropped 47% since 1968, and now stands at just 0.35% of attendees’ income.
  • “Fewer people are seeing churches as the primary conduit for meeting the larger (charitable and evangelistic) need.”

Paul wrote to the church in Corinth about the overflowing joy of giving to help the needs of others. He commended those with rich generosity, and encouraged the church to excel in this grace of giving.

Here’s the sad fact: The less we give, the less the Good News about God’s love is shared.

God wants us to give because we want to give. Paul even said I am not commanding you to give, but instead…

Each of you must make up your own mind about how much to give. But don’t feel sorry that you must give and don’t feel that you are forced to give. God loves people who love to give. (2 Corinthians 9:7)

Let’s change this around. Let’s buck the nationwide trend. Remember…

MORE GIVING = MORE GOOD NEWS

!

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Thursdays With Oswald—The Same Gospel Re-Stated

October 14, 2010 — Craig T. Owens

This is a weekly series with things I’m reading and pondering from Oswald Chambers. You can read the original seed thought here, or type “Thursdays With Oswald” in the search box to read more entries.

The Same Gospel Re-Stated

      What is needed today is not a new gospel, but live men and women who can re-state the Gospel of the Son of God in terms that will reach the very heart of our problems. Today men are flinging the truth overboard as well as the terms. Why should we not become “workmen who need not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth” to our own people? The majority of orthodox ministers are hopelessly useless, and the unorthodox seem to be the only ones who are used. We need men and women saturated with the truth of God who can re-state the old truth in terms that appeal to our day.

From Approved Unto God

So saturated with God’s Word that I think it, speak it, live it. Just as the Apostle Paul stated to the Corinthian church:

Clearly, you are a letter from Christ showing the result of our ministry among you. This “letter” is written not with pen and ink, but with the Spirit of the living God. It is carved not on tablets of stone, but on human hearts.

Can I repeat Oswald Chambers’ last line again, just so it can sink in: We need men and women saturated with the truth of God who can re-state the old truth in terms that appeal to our day.

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Thought Patrol

October 13, 2010 — Craig T. Owens

Have you ever found yourself in circumstances that weren’t exactly what you had planned or hoped for? You know, things are just not going your way? What do you do then? How do you handle this? I suggest the first place to start is by thinking about your thinking.

I know that may sound a little unusual, but I have often times had to stop to think about what I’m thinking about. To ask myself, “Why am I thinking that?”

I believe this is what the Bible is really saying when it tells us to take every thought captive. If we don’t, our negative thoughts can lead us to unplanned places and can keep us trapped there. But if we will take time to think about what we’re thinking about, we can discover the key to freedom from that undesirable place.

A few quotes to get us started:

“No man has ever succeeded who kept his mind on negative things… and no man ever rises above his thoughts of himself.” —C.M. Ward

“You are today where your thoughts have brought you. You will be tomorrow where your thoughts take you.” —James Allen, As A Man Thinketh

“They themselves are makers of themselves by virtue of the thoughts which they choose and encourage; that mind is the master-weaver, both of the inner garment of character and the outer garment of circumstance, and that, as they may have hitherto woven in ignorance and pain they may now weave in enlightenment and happiness.” —James Allen, As A Man Thinketh

“Only when you assume full accountability for your thoughts, feelings, actions, and results can you direct your own destiny; otherwise, someone or something else will.” —Roger Conners, Tom Smith & Craig Hickman, The Oz Principle

“Summing it all up, friends, I’d say you’ll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. Put into practice what you learned from me, what you heard and saw and realized. Do that, and God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies.” —Philippians 4:8, The Bible

Let’s all work on patrolling our thoughts today.

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Engaging Culture

September 29, 2010 — Craig T. Owens

I read something very interesting: Next to Christmas, more money is spent on Halloween than on any other holiday event. Halloween?!? Wow! We’re in the midst of planning our church’s role on Halloween night, so I’ve been thinking quite a bit about engaging our culture.

It’s better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.

So here’s how I think followers of Jesus Christ should light a candle to engage culture:

(1) Have the right motivation. In Jesus’ inaugural sermon, He said He was coming to preach the Good News about God’s love. He purposely left out the part of Isaiah’s prophesy that talked about God’s coming judgment. There will be a time for that, but for now, our motivation should be to make known the favor of the Lord.

(2) Get out of your box. If you only hang around with Christians, your ability to effectively engage culture will be diminished. If you never get around others, it’s sort of like salt that sits in the saltshaker too long. Paul told the Athenians that he had been walking around their city looking at their culture.

(3) Listen. As Paul talked to the Athenians, he quoted their poets to them. He knew what they were listening to because he was listening too. What are people watching on TV? What movies are they talking about? What music are they listening to? You can find the key to their heart by knowing something about what interests them.

(4) Collaborate. There are lots of other faith-based organizations, non-government organizations, and churches that are already active in your community. Join forces with them.

(5) Just be there. Go to local restaurants, cheer on the local sports teams, join a rec league team, attend the city council meetings, volunteer at a shelter or food pantry. Just be there! After a while, people will begin to ask you why you are so involved, and you’ll have a great platform to speak to them.

It started when God said, “Light up the darkness!” and our lives filled up with light as we saw and understood God in the face of Christ, all bright and beautiful.

Are you engaging your culture? It’s time to go shine!

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Devilish Scheming

June 28, 2010 — Craig T. Owens

If you’ve ever locked horns with the devil in spiritual warfare, you know that he’s a schemer. Paul wrote to the church at Corinth to remind them that we shouldn’t be unaware of his scheming. And Peter said that the devil is always on the prowl, like a scheming lion looking for a place to attack.

So it should come as no surprise that since my message was about unity in the Body of Christ that the devil’s scheming would be to bring about disunity. There was just a weird mood happening yesterday. In fact, in our pre-service prayer time, I felt prompted to pray out loud that God would knock down any distractions to what the Holy Spirit wanted to do.

I saw it coming … I prayed hard against it … and my prayers knocked down the enemy before he could fully implement his devilish scheme.

Well, not exactly.

Yes, I did feel prompted to pray against distractions, but I should have been praying against disunity too. As a result, I could feel the fight all morning. It would be more accurate to say that I could feel something all morning. It wasn’t until I got home and commented to Betsy about what I had been feeling that I got clued in. She said, “What did you expect? You were talking about unity today, so obviously the devil is going to attack that very thing.”

Duh! Why didn’t I see that? I’m so grateful for a godly wife who catches these things for me.

But I learned something yesterday. I learned that my prayers need to be more specifically-targeted prayers. Sort of like the “smart bombs” our military uses that are laser-guided right on target. Like Paul said, I’m not going to be unaware of the devilish scheming.

Spiritual warfare is always hard work, which is why in Paul’s teaching on spiritual warfare he told us to keep on praying for each other.

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Leave Something Nice Behind

May 17, 2010 — Craig T. Owens

I walked into a coffee shop for a meeting this morning and someone who had been in Biggby before me was wearing the same perfume that Betsy wears. It made me think of her throughout my meeting. Without even realizing it, some anonymous woman left something nice behind for me.

Here’s a thought…

…how about if we find a way to leave something nice behind everywhere we go?

A few thoughts on how we could do this:

  • Pick up a piece of trash blowing across the parking lot (even if it’s not your trash).
  • Wipe the water off the restroom counter (even if you didn’t splash it there).
  • Smile at the over-worked, under-paid server who is serving you (maybe even leave a larger tip).
  • Straighten up the magazines in the waiting room (even if you didn’t mess them up).
  • Put the toys back in the toy box (even if your kids didn’t play with them).
  • Restack the fallen cups (even if you didn’t knock them over).

Do something unexpected.

Leave everything a little better than you found it.

Leave something nice behind.

C’mon, let’s make a difference.

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