Don’t Be That Guy

I love studying leadership books and learning from the lives of great men and women of history. The leadership section of my library is only slightly larger than the biography section. One of the saddest things to see is a leader who self-destructs. I was just reviewing some of my notes about leadership failures when Tim Elmore’s latest e-newsletter arrived entitled Self-Destructive Leaders.

Check out a couple of blurbs from this excellent article:

Projecting their self-worth.
There are few things more unappetizing than a leader who has to constantly talk about how important they are. They name drop, they remind others of their busyness, accomplishments, authority, past positions, degrees, or pedigree. It’s like they’re lobbying for attention and affirmation. It’s a sad commentary when so much of a leader’s energy is spent doing this instead of helping their team reach their goals.

Possessing a controlling spirit.
Often, insecure leaders react to their inward desperation with control. They feel if they can control people, they’ll maintain absolute authority. … They resort to more regulations and policies to enforce compliance among staff instead of trusting them and earning their loyalty….

Comparing themselves to others obsessively.
When a leader has a low EQ [emotional intelligence quotient], they naturally tend to look around them; they look outward rather than inward (at their own natural strengths and style) or upward (to their Creator for their sense of identity).  They become consumed with comparing their own traits or achievements to those of other leaders. Soon, their team ceases to operate in a healthy way. They’re driven by comparing and competing with others instead of capitalizing on their own core competencies.

Possessing self-imposed blindness.
This one is huge. All leaders have blind spots. Like in a car, blind spots happen not so much because of stupidity but position. The driver can’t see certain things. Sadly, self-destructive leaders refuse help. They repel any input from colleagues and insist on living in a bubble that makes them feel good. All is well, or so they think. Their insecurity won’t let them face the facts. They prefer a perspective that’s limited, but comfortable. Their narrow view will eventually lead to an accident.

Here’s what wise King Solomon said about the self-destructive leader:

Arrogant know-it-alls stir up discord, but wise men and women listen to each other’s counsel. (Proverbs 13:10)

If you ignore criticism, you will end in poverty and disgrace; if you accept correction, you will be honored. (Proverbs 13:18)

The saddest part is this – the self-destructive leader will read this and then say to himself, “Nope, that’s not me. This is describing someone else.”

Don’t be that guy (or gal)!

  • Look in the mirror of Scripture.
  • Listen to the counsel of others.
  • Listen to the criticism of your teammates. (Hint: if your teammates aren’t telling you anything that you need to improve on, it’s not because you’re perfect. Either you have intimidated them into silence, or you’re deaf to what they’re telling you.)
  • Learn from the lives of great leaders from the past. Read their biographies and autobiographies.

Learning To Distinguish

In Moses’ instructions to the priests, he said, “You must distinguish between the holy and common, between the unclean and the clean.”

Why? Because these men were to be leaders. He went on to say, “You must teach the Israelites all the decrees.”

If I’m going to be a leader, I must be able to distinguish.

Here’s where the Holy Spirit is challenging me. I am working on distinguishing between…

Good and Best

Acceptable and Excellent

Common and Holy

Ordinary and Extraordinary

Want and Need

Present and Participant

Quantity and Quality

I am certain that this list is just a start, and that it’s going to be a lifetime pursuit.

God’s Favor

It’s a well-known story: Moses is on the mountaintop with God while all the Israelites back at camp think he’s dead. They then convince Aaron to make a golden calf to be their god. The True God is ready to bring down His punishment on these idol worshipers when two incredible words stop God’s judgment dead in its tracks…

But Moses.

God was ready to wipe them out and start all over with Moses. Think about it: God offered Moses the opportunity to be on the same level of remembrance with Abraham. Years later people would be saying, “The God of Abraham, Isaac, Israel, and Moses.” What an incredible honor for Moses!

But Moses.

Instead, Moses interceded for his people. Moses sought God’s favor. He knew God to be the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin. He could have had it all for himself.

But Moses.

He asked God to forgive the people’s idolatry and betrayal. God replied, “I know you by name and you have found favor with Me.” If you had God’s favor, what would you do with it? Would you ask for great things for yourself? Your family? Your friends?

But Moses.

Moses used this favor to ask God to help him stay in His favor. “If You are pleased with me, teach me Your ways so I may know You and continue to find favor with You.” Moses knew that it was God’s favor that distinguishes one man from the crowd, that sets a man apart as a leader.

But Moses…

just wanted God to be glorified. And God responded: “My Presence will go with you.”

I want to be a “But Craig” leader… one that stands apart as God’s leader; one who only seeks to bring glory to God.

How about you? Do you want to be that “But ____________” leader too?

Higher Standards For Greater Rewards

Most people think of the Ten Commandments as God’s law given through Moses. Actually the Ten Commandments are just the beginning of the laws, practices, and regulations that God gives to His people. The rest of the book of Exodus, the entire book of Leviticus, and the first ten chapters of Numbers compromise the bulk of the law.

For those of you keeping track, that’s nearly 60 chapters of rules and regulations.

Why so many? I think the answer is found in the lead-up to the Ten Commandments:

Now if you obey Me fully and keep My covenant, then out of all nations you will be My treasured possession. Although the whole earth is Mine, you will be for Me a kingdom of priests and a holy nation.

God wants people who are treasured. A people who are priests. A people who are holy. In short: He wants pacesetting leaders.

Priests have intimate access to God, and they are people who set an example for others to follow. In order to enjoy these special privileges, priests must be held to higher standards.

These are not standards just for those of Jewish ancestry, but for anyone who is a follower of Jesus Christ. Look what John recorded in the last book of the Bible:

To Him who loves us and has freed us from our sins by His blood, and has made us to be a kingdom and priests to serve His God and Father—to Him be glory and power for ever and ever! Amen.

…With Your blood You purchased men for God from every tribe and language and people and nation. You have made them to be a kingdom and priests to serve our God, and they will reign on the earth.

Yes, the standards to be a priest—to be a holy leader—are higher. But the rewards are immeasurable!

Are you ready to bring greater glory to God? Do you want to be a pacesetting leader for the Kingdom of heaven? Then ask the Holy Spirit to sanctify you as you take on the discipline of greater responsibility. Live up to higher standards, and you won’t be disappointed by the rewards!

Let Me Give You A Piece Of Advice

How many times have you heard someone say you, “Let me give you a piece of advice”? Ah, yes, everyone has some advice to share. Everyone has an opinion. Everyone wants to give you a piece of their mind. Everyone is an expert in an area where they think you’re deficient.

I remember going through comment cards at the end of a long week of youth camp. I’d read one card that would say the food was excellent. Just a couple of cards later some “expert” would share how terrible the food was. One would say they loved the evangelist, another would give their “advice” on where the evangelist missed it.

Whom should I listen to? Who should get my ear?

In William Shakespeare’s Hamlet, Polonius gives this counsel to Laertes “Give every man thine ear, but few thy voice: Take each man’s censure, but reserve thy judgment.”

Nice prose, but how do we live it out?

I like the example I see from a man named Jethro in the Bible. Jethro is Moses’ father-in-law, and he really only appears on the scene in just one chapter (Exodus 18), but his method of giving advice should be a model for us all.

Credentials—Jethro was a God-fearing man. If you are a follower of Jesus Christ, weigh carefully the advice given to you by those who don’t have the same biblical foundation.

Relationship—Jethro had a personal relationship with Moses, he wasn’t just a business acquaintance. That means Jethro had a vested interest in Moses’ success or failure.

Firsthand—Jethro heard about what was happening, but he came to see it for himself. Beware of those “experts” who only have secondhand information about you or your situation.

Up-Close—Jethro spent an entire day right by Moses’ side just watching and listening. He saw what was going on from the front row.

Questions—Jethro led with questions, not with advice. Before giving Moses his opinion, Jethro asked clarifying questions.

Wisdom—Only after all of this did Jethro give his opinion to Moses. The words that he shared were then received by Moses as God-given wisdom.

Your counselors should earn the right to be heard. Just because someone has an opinion doesn’t make him an expert. And just because someone has been-there-done-that doesn’t mean that her way should be your way.

Screen out the clamoring voices by making sure they have credentials, a relationship with you, firsthand experience, and godly wisdom.

Wind Or Anchor

I so appreciate my church Board!

They are by no means a bunch of “yes men” (especially since one of our Board members is a woman!), but they are definitely great teammates. When I want to dream, they dream along with me. When I’m looking for a new way to do something, they help me explore our options. When I propose that we experiment, they give me the latitude to make the attempt.

They are the wind in my sails.

Unfortunately I’ve been around too many board members who feel it is their job to play devil’s advocate, or to hold the pastor to the time-honored traditions (without any regard to their effectiveness), or to always play everything safe.

They are an anchor around a pastor’s ankle.

French novelist Andre Gide noted,

“One doesn’t discover new lands without consenting to lose sight of the shore for a very long time.”

Thanks, Calvary A/G Board, for allowing us to lose sight of the shore every once in awhile so that we can see what new lands God will help us discover. You are definitely the wind in my sails.

What about you, dear reader? You may not be on an official board, but your comments and attitudes can either be wind or an anchor to someone close to you. Which are you?

Mad Church Disease (book review)

Read this book and save your life.

Seriously.

I have seen far too many good people get burned-out in the most unlikely place. The one place where you would expect wholeness and vitality and safety and health: Church! In Mad Church Disease Anne Jackson draws the comparison to bovine spongiform encephalopathy (better known as mad cow disease) to confront mad church disease head-on.

Here’s the insidious thing about the way mad cow disease spreads: after infected cows die, they are ground up and fed to healthy cows. So unwittingly the disease is perpetuated because no one recognizes it’s there. Sadly that’s what happens far too often in the church. We have developed cultures that continue to burn-out people, and then we let those burned-out people feed (develop) new people

Anne shines the light of truth on this ugly disease. She confronts the symptoms head-on, and offers practical steps for helping people get healthy.

As someone who came very close to getting burned-out by mad church disease, I can attest how right-on-the-mark Anne’s book is. And to bolster her diagnosis, Anne interviews several leading pastors whose “second opinion” confirm the original diagnosis. I liked this observation from Bill Hybels:

“Especially as leaders in the church, we consistently need to be filled up and buoyed in our spirits because everybody takes their cue from the leader. If the leader is exhausted, then the people following that leader will feel exhausted. If the leader is wearing thin on hope, then people start losing hope too. If the leader gets pessimistic, everybody gets pessimistic.”

So who should read Mad Church Disease?

  • Pastors
  • Paid church staff
  • Volunteer church ministers
  • Counselors
  • Church board members

Whether you have been infected by mad church disease or not, you need to read this book. It will either be a source of healing for you, or an eye-opener to help protect yourself and others around you from this deadly disease.

The first step to eliminating mad church disease is recognizing its symptoms. Mad Church Disease does just that, and then goes further to talk about the steps for healing. Thanks, Anne, for a straightforward look at this serious disease.

An Extra Hour Of Sleep

I’m a morning person. I absolutely love getting up early and spending some quiet time alone with my Bible. This is the time of day I most absorb all that God is saying to me. It’s my most creative time too. In fact, I so love getting up early that most mornings I’m awake before my alarm clock goes off.

But not this morning.

Today my alarm clock began playing Way-FM and I felt like I was in a fog. It took me a minute or so to even open my eyes and sit up.

I was about to press ahead with my morning, when I thought, “I should sleep some more.”

You see, I’ve learned a few things about myself. When I’m tired…

  • I have a shorter attention span.
  • I’m not as creative.
  • I’m not as patient.
  • I am more prone to give in to temptation.
  • I make decisions that are too short-sighted.
  • I’m more susceptible to colds and flu.

So I re-set the alarm and slept another hour.

Sometimes a little extra sleep is one of the most important things you can do to improve your physical health, your emotional stamina, and your spiritual maturity.

UPDATE: In my book Shepherd Leadership: The Metrics That Really Matter I have five chapters about a leader’s health—mental, physical, spiritual, and emotional health is vital to a leader’s effectiveness and longevity.

Overcoming Barriers To Church Growth (book review)

Hold on a second. I’m sure when you saw the title of Michael Fletcher’s book—Overcoming Barriers To Church Growth—there were two thoughts that could have immediately popped in your mind: (1) “I’m not a pastor, so this book’s not for me”; or (2) “I am a pastor, but no one’s going to tell me how to grow my church.”

If you thought either of those things and didn’t explore this book any further, you’d really be robbing yourself.

In the case of the first objection (“I’m not a pastor”), Fletcher does a good job in making the case that church life is a team sport. The pastor cannot grow the church; the elders cannot grow the church; the attendees cannot grow the church. At least, not by themselves. Everyone needs to be involved for the church to be healthy.

In the case of the second objection (“No one’s going to tell me how to grow my church”), I would lovingly point out, “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” Pastor Fletcher’s humble goal in writing this book was to help churches grow beyond the two natural barriers that every church will face. You’d be wise to let his hindsight be your foresight.

I found myself immediately drawn into this book. Michael’s writing style is very conversational and easy-flowing. And the concepts are uncomplicated and lend themselves to being quickly applied. The more I read the more excited I became about the potential in our church.

If you are a part of a church—pastor, elder, or attendee—you and your church will benefit from reading this book. Remember the church is a Body, so we all have our part to play in it. Arming yourself with the principles in this book will help you to play your part even better.

I’m a Bethany House book reviewer.

Jesus Tweets

Listen to the podcast of this post by clicking on the player below, and you can also subscribe on Apple, Spotify, or Audible. 

I began using 𝕏 (formerly known as Twitter) in 2009. There is something challenging about conveying what I’m doing or thinking or encouraging others in 280 characters or less. I also love the bite-sized flow of comments from others that keep me informed and entertained.

As with anything I commit myself to, it always has to pass the “Would Jesus Do This” test. So, would Jesus use 𝕏? Would we be reading @JesusChrist tweets if He were on earth today?

I think so!

Just a quick survey of the Gospels will show you how many of His profound statements were in the 𝕏-ready 280-characters-or-less format…

In refuting the temptations of satan, all three Old Testament passages Jesus quoted are 𝕏-length.

  • Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.
  • Do not put the Lord your God to the test.
  • Worship the Lord your God, and serve Him only.

In His famous Sermon on the Mount, all of the “blessed are” beatitudes are tweetable.

  • Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
  • Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
  • Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.
  • Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.
  • Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.
  • Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.
  • Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.
  • Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
  • Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of Me.

Each sentence of Jesus’ model prayer fits in the 𝕏 dialogue box.

  • Our Father in heaven, hallowed be Your name, Your kingdom come, Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.
  • Give us today our daily bread.
  • Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.
  • And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.

All of Christ’s powerful “I AM” declarations in the Gospel of John are less than 140 characters.

  • I am the bread of life. He who comes to Me will never go hungry, and he who believes in Me will never be thirsty.
  • I am the light of the world. Whoever follows Me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.
  • I am the gate; whoever enters through Me will be saved.
  • I am the good shepherd; I know My sheep and My sheep know Me.
  • I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in Me will live, even though he dies.
  • I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.
  • I am the true vine, and My Father is the gardener.
  • I am the vine; you are the branches.

Even the most well-known verse of all fits into the 𝕏 dialogue box:

For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.

The words of Jesus are just as timely and relevant today as they were the day He first spoke them, so let’s use our social media platforms to rebroadcast (or retweet) these life-changing truths.

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