The Wounded Healer (book review)

October 28, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

Wounded Healer, The

“For the minister is called to recognize the sufferings of his time in his own heart and make that recognition the starting point of his service. Whether he tries to enter into a dislocated world, relate to a convulsive generation, or speak to a dying man, his service will not be perceived as authentic unless it comes from a heart wounded by the suffering about which he speaks” (from the introduction).

Henri Nouwen was a man ahead of his time. Although this book was written in the early 1970s, it sounds so applicable for today. The Wounded Healer challenged me as a Christian leader to step into the pain-filled lives as others in a more authentic way. Nouwen argues that healers must first be personally acquainted with the same type of pain that other wounded people are experiencing.

Isaiah 53 says that Christ “was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our guilt and iniquities; the chastisement [needful to obtain] peace and well-being for us was upon Him, and with the stripes [that wounded] Him we are healed and made whole.” Because Jesus was wounded in the same way we are wounded, He knows how to help (see Hebrews 2:18).

One closing quote from Nouwen: “If there is any posture that disturbs a suffering man or woman, it is aloofness. … No one can help anyone without becoming involved, without entering with his whole person into the painful situations, without taking the risk of become hurt, wounded or even destroyed in the process. The beginning and the end of Christian leadership is to give your life for others.”

This book reconfirmed my desire to—like Jesus—be a wounded healer for others.

Posted in Uncategorized. Tags: , , , , , , , , , , . 3 Comments »

Familiar Conversations

October 13, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

DSCN0995

I read a long time ago the statement, “Leaders are readers.” I’m a wholehearted supporter of this. Thanks to a marvelously talented carpenter in our church, I have a new home for all of my books. I was so excited to get my library out of boxes and onto the shelves.

Actually, they’re more than just books, they are familiar conversations. Rene Descartes said, “The reading of all good books is like conversation with the finest men of past centuries.” I agree.

People often ask me what I’m reading or what they should be reading. As to the second question—what should they read—I answer, “What conversation would you like to have? Is there an area of your life you would love to talk with someone who’s been-there-done-that?” That’s what reading is, having a conversation with some of the great thinkers or most articulate people in past or modern history.

As to the first question—what am I reading—I try to keep readers of the blog up-to-date. Down the right column you will see the list of books I have in progress, and the ones I’ve read this year. Let me highlight just a couple of books.

Wounded Healer. To go deeper in my relationships with others, I have to be able to relate to them at deeper levels. Henri Nouwen has captured the essence of this in Wounded Healer. We cannot minister to others out of our wounds, but out of our scars. In other words, once we’ve healed, but the scar is still there to remind us of the wound, we’re ready to help others heal from the same injury.

Love & Respect. Even though Betsy and I have known each other for nearly 25 years, I know I can still learn more about being a better husband. Emerson Eggerichs is helping me do a better job.

21 Laws of Leadership. This is a classic leadership book from John Maxwell. I can’t even count how many times I’ve read through this book. But I’m going through it again with my church Board, and watching John teach the video series on this book too. Every time I have this conversation with John Maxwell I learn something new.

To be a better leader in any area of your life, don’t shy away from having better conversations with great authors. If you’ve got a book to suggest, send it my way. I’d also be happy to help you find a book as a conversation-starter for you, just ask me.

Posted in Uncategorized. Tags: , , , , , , , . 1 Comment »

Put Your Dream To The Test (book review)

August 11, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

Dream Test I’m a HUGE John Maxwell fan. He has been a mentor-from-afar for me for a number of years. So I know whenever I pick up a Maxwell book I’m going to be challenged and stretched in my thinking. Put Your Dream To The Test lived up to my expectations.

What’s your dream? Everyone has a dream, so what’s yours? I have always loved this quote from T.E. Lawrence:

“All men dream, but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds, wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act on their dreams with open eyes, to make them possible.”

If you are a “dreamer of the day” you will find great value in reading this. In this book, Dr. Maxwell guides you through ten questions to help you refine the pursuit of your dream—

  • Is my dream really my dream?
  • Do I clearly see my dream?
  • Am I depending on factors within my control to achieve my dream?
  • Does my dream compel me to follow it?
  • Do I have a strategy to reach my dream?
  • Have I included the people I need to realize my dream?
  • Am I willing to pay the price for my dream?
  • Am I moving closer to my dream?
  • Does working toward my dream bring satisfaction?
  • Does my dream benefit others?

In typical Maxwell fashion, I was challenged to think differently, I was encouraged to renew what I have already learned, and I realized some things I needed to give up. One of the aspects of Maxwell’s books that I especially appreciate is how energized I feel after reading them. I feel like the counsel he gives me has prepared me to live my life more fully.

If you have a dream that is bigger than you, good! If you have a dream that size, I would strongly recommend that you read this excellent book to help you see your dream and seize your dream.

Posted in Uncategorized. Tags: , , , , , . 2 Comments »

I’ll Make You An Offer You Can’t Refuse (Book Review)

June 17, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

I'll Make You An Offer You Can't RefuseOkay, I’ll be honest with you, the title of Michael Franzese’s latest book sounds like a cliché—I’ll Make You An Offer You Can’t Refuse. Sounds like a line right out of “The Godfather” or “Goodfellas,” right? But if you’re involved in the world of business, Mr. Franzese’s book is exactly that: an offer (book) you can’t refuse. From how to craft a business plan, to picking the right people, to learning how to negotiate the best deals, Mr. Franzese uses his years of wiseguy street-smarts to give you an advantage.

From the very first page, this book engaged me because I felt like I was having a conversation with the author. His style is very relaxed, and his stories about his business successes and failures are compelling. It’s not often that a business book reads like a novel, but I’ll Make You An Offer does just that.

Throughout all of his lessons, Mr. Franzese makes the contrast between the principles spelled out in the mobster’s bible (The Prince by Machiavelli) and principles articulated in the Holy Bible (specifically the writings of Solomon). Although he learned his strategies from his years in La Cosa Nostra (“this thing of ours” or the mob life), he makes a strong case his strategies will work in the legit life. The difference is the motivation that drives the strategies: Machiavellian or biblical.

“A dictionary definition of success says it’s ‘the favorable or prosperous termination of attempts or endeavors.’ … But dictionary definitions are like sausage casings. It all depends on what you stuff inside” (quote from page 144).

Whether you are just getting started in a new business venture, or whether you are not satisfied with the results of your current business venture, you will find invaluable strategies here to help you. This former mob boss truly does make you an offer you can’t refuse.

Posted in Uncategorized. Tags: , , , , , , , , , , . Leave a Comment »

Soap Opera Drift

May 18, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

Listen to the podcast of this post by clicking on the player below, and you can also subscribe on Apple, Spotify, or Audible.

Disclaimer: My aggregate soap opera viewing time for my entire life is about 52 minutes, but I still think I know what I’m talking about <grin!>.

Soap operas are usually pretty predictable. If you’ve watched them for even a short time it’s not hard to figure out who’s who and what’s what. In fact, the plot lines are typically so predictable that you can stop watching a particular soap opera for months—or even years—and when you tune in again it will only take a day or so to once again know who’s who and what’s what.

One of the main reasons for this is the simplicity of the plot lines. There are three types of characters: good guys, bad guys, and wishy-washy guys that are swayed by the good guys or bad guys.

We applaud when the good guys win and the bad guys get what’s coming to them. We groan when the good guys get unfairly treated and the bad guys seem to get away with their badness. If we could give advice to the soap opera characters it would be pretty straightforward: “If you’re a good guy, we’ll cheer for you!”

But here’s the problem: it’s becoming harder and harder to tell the difference between the good guys and bad guys. It seems like more of them fall into the wishy-washy category. Over time, the characters have become mostly good but can be swayed to take revenge or cut corners. Or they’re mostly bad but still have a soft place in their heart to help the little orphan child.

There are very few really good guys left.

There’s a drift from good to mostly good. But mostly good is only one step away from mostly bad. And only one more step from mostly bad to just-plain-bad.

I’ve been reading through the soap opera history of the kings of Israel and Judah. Like our modern soap operas there are three types of kings: (a) the good kings did what was right in God’s eyes; (b) the bad kings did what was evil in the God’s eyes; and (c) the wishy-washy kings usually did what was right but had a “however” attached to their reign.

Unfortunately, most of the good kings tended to drift from good to mostly good, and eventually to mostly bad. The drift continued each generation toward mostly bad until God was hard-pressed to find any king who wasn’t bad. How sad: God’s blessing was right there for any good king to claim, but they kept drifting away!

Drifting happens so easily, which is why we have to be so diligent.

     You’re blessed when you stay on course, walking steadily on the road revealed by GOD. You’re blessed when you follow His directions, doing your best to find Him. That’s right—you don’t go off on your own; you walk straight along the road He set. You, GOD, prescribed the right way to live; now You expect us to live it. Oh, that my steps might be steady, keeping to the course You set; then I’d never have any regrets in comparing my life with Your counsel. I thank You for speaking straight from Your heart; I learn the pattern of Your righteous ways. (Psalm 119:1-7, The Message paraphrase)

Just like those soap opera characters or soap opera kings, we can get some pretty straightforward advice from the Bible: “If you stay on course, walk straight along the road God set for you, He will bless your life.”

Don’t drift.

Don’t settle for mostly good.

Don’t assume you’re doing right in God’s eyes; KNOW that you’re doing right in God’s eyes by following His Word.

►► Would you please prayerfully consider supporting this ministry? My Patreon supporters get behind-the-scenes access to exclusive materials. ◀︎◀︎

Posted in Uncategorized. Tags: , , , , , , , , . 2 Comments »

Gaining Reason By Becoming Mad

May 12, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

An excerpt from Kahlil Gibran’s The Madman—

Once there ruled in the distant city of Wirani a king who was both mighty and wise. And he was feared for his might and loved for his wisdom.

Now, in the heart of that city was a well, whose water was cool and crystalline, from which all the inhabitants drank, even the king and his courtiers; for there was no other well.

One night when all were asleep, a witch entered the city, and poured seven drops of strange liquid into the well, and said, “From this hour he who drinks this water shall become mad.”

Next morning all the inhabitants, save the king and his lord chamberlain, drank from the well and became mad, even as the witch had foretold.

And during that day the people in the narrow streets and in the market places did naught but whisper to one another, “The king is mad. Our king and his lord chamberlain have lost their reason. Surely we cannot be ruled by a mad king. We must dethrone him.”

That evening the king ordered a golden goblet to be filled from the well. And when it was brought to him he drank deeply, and gave it to his lord chamberlain to drink.

And there was great rejoicing in that distant city of Wirani, because its king and its lord chamberlain had regained their reason.

When I was in high school some of my peers from my “Christian” school were behaving in ways I thought un-Christlike. So I challenged them on their behavior. Their response was something like, “Quit being like John the Baptist—quit being so holier-than-thou. Why can’t you just go along with us?”

In other words, they were mad (in regard to biblical behavior) and they wanted me to drink from the same cup to ‘regain their reason.’

When confronted with their poor decisions or less-than-desirable behaviors most people would rather pull the wise, reasoned man down to their level of ‘madness’ than aspire to a higher level of ‘reason.’

Check out Erwin McManus’ thoughts on this, “When we live below a standard, it is simply human nature to redefine the standard as unreasonable and establish standards that our patterns are already accomplishing. We keep lowering the bar until we clear it.”

Instead, why don’t you raise your standard today? Don’t partake of the madness of others just to be accepted by them—you set the standard for decency, holiness, nobleness, self-sacrifice, self-control, and temperance!

Live right,
speak the truth,
despise exploitation,
refuse bribes,
reject violence,
avoid evil amusements.
This is how you raise your standard of living!
A safe and stable way to live.
A nourishing, satisfying way to live. (Isaiah 33:15-16, Message)

Posted in Uncategorized. Tags: , , , , , , , , . 1 Comment »

Moderate Back Thrusts

April 1, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

How would you like to have this written on your tombstone—

Appointed by God to be king
Caused all Israel to sin against God
Doomed my family line to extinction

That is exactly the epitaph of King Jeroboam (see 1 Kings 13-14). In God’s indictment of Jeroboam He says, “Because of the sins you have committed, and the sins you have caused Israel to commit, you have provoked Me to anger and thrust Me behind your back.”

I find that phrase—thrust Me behind your back—intriguing. The word thrust means to throw something away. How exactly does one go about throwing God away? Can you crumple Him up like a piece of paper and toss Him in a garbage can? Can you grab Him and shove Him behind you? Is He like a stack of old newspapers thrown in a recycling bin? Clearly not!

One only thrusts God behind one’s back little by little. Just moderate back thrusts.

John Maxwell was exactly right when he said that whatever good things a leader does in excess, those following will do in moderation. Whatever poor things the leader does in moderation, those following will do in excess. The “moderate” ways in which Jeroboam thrust God behind his back caused all of Israel to sin excessively. And that became Jeroboam’s eternal legacy!

People are watching me—my kids, my neighbors, my friends, the baristas at Starbucks—what example am I setting for them? There are only two examples I can set: (1) Pursue God with all my heart, all my soul, all my mind, and all my strength; in other words, love God to excess. Or (2) Moderately thrust God behind my back little by little by little.

Search me, O God, see if there is ANY moderate back thrusting in me and lead me in the way everlasting (see Psalm 139:23-24).

Posted in Uncategorized. Tags: , , , , , , , , , , . Leave a Comment »

Giant Killers

March 2, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

Multiple choice quiz: with which of the following biblical characters are you familiar?

(a) David son of Jesse.
(b) Abishai son of Zeruiah.
(c) Sibecai the Hushathite.
(d) Elhanan son of Jaare-Oregim.
(e) Jonathan son of Shimeah.

Honestly, now, how did you do? I’m guessing you at least got (a) since David is probably the best known king of Israel. But what about the other guys? Have you ever heard of them before?

Do you know what they all have in common? They are all a part of King David’s inner circle, and they are all giant killers.

Isn’t it interesting how like attracts like? David became the original giant killer when he killed Goliath. Abishai, Sibecai, Elhanan, and Jonathan were probably attracted to David because of his bravery, because of the stories they had heard of his victory over Goliath. But then something starts to stir inside of these men—they want to emulate David, they want to be giant killers too.

So here are the questions I’m asking myself today:
(a) Have I won any victories that would attract other “warriors” to me?
(b) Is what I’m doing today something I would want those closest to me to emulate?
(c) Are there some giants still hanging around that I need to defeat?

You can find out a lot about the significance of the victories you have won by who’s attracted to you, and by who’s imitating your lifestyle.

Posted in Uncategorized. Tags: , , , , , , , . Leave a Comment »

Piling On!

January 26, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

It just wasn’t going very well for David!

His boss, Saul, was jealous of him and was trying to kill him.
He had to leave his best friend behind when he ran for his life.
And his wife.
And his Mom & Dad.
And his brothers.
And his pastor.
Then his best friend is almost killed for standing up for David.

So David runs to enemy territory. After all “the enemy of my enemy is my friend,” right?

Um, not so much! The king of Gath was Saul’s enemy, but he wasn’t too fond of David either. How does David get out of this one? He starts drooling like an idiot, clawing weird symbols on the wooden doors and acting like a madman!

David runs away from Gath to Adullam Cave, which then quickly becomes the gathering spot for every distressed, bankrupt malcontent in the country. Some following David had!

Have you ever had one of those days? You know, where nothing is going right, and everywhere you turn is simply more trouble—out of the frying pan and into the fire! The problems just seem to keep piling on!

Yet there in Adullam Cave, David pens some of the most profound words. Read them carefully, and note the progression:

I will extol the LORD at all times; His praise will always be on my lips.
My soul will boast in the LORD; let the afflicted hear and rejoice.
Glorify the LORD with me; let us exalt His name together. (Psalm 34:1-3)

Notice how David chooses to praise God as an act of his will—I will extol the Lord… I will praise Him with my lips.

And then this act of his will gets into his soul (his emotions), and as a result, the other distressed, bankrupt malcontents begin to see something different in David. He doesn’t break down when the problems pile on; he praises God!

And then these malcontents begin to glorify the Lord with David; they begin to exalt His name together.

Friends, how you choose to respond when the problems pile on is vital. Yes, misery loves company. If you are feeling miserable, other miserable people will flock to you. Don’t use this group to have a pity party, but see it as an incredible opportunity to use your will to praise God.

Remember, feelings follow actions. You may not feel like praising God because the problems are piled on so high, but when you act the feelings will follow. David went from “I will” to “my soul” in just one verse! And the same thing will happen for you too!

A distressed, malcontented world is watching you—what will you do when your problems pile on?

Posted in Uncategorized. Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , . 2 Comments »

What A Woman!

December 10, 2008 — Craig T. Owens

Gustave Dore’s painting of Deborah’s song of triumph

Do you remember the old Enjoli perfume commercial? It was a classic! What a woman—she could make breakfast, pass out the kisses, and still get to work before nine in the morning. She could work 9-5, bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, and never let her man forget he was a man.

Wow! What a woman!

I was reading Judges 4-5 in the Bible this morning and was reminded of this commercial when I read about Deborah—the Bible’s version of the Enjoli woman.

Deborah was a devoted wife, a first-class mother, and a full-time prophetess. People from all over Israel came to her for godly advice for their domestic problems. There were national problems too—King Jabin and his general Sisera, with his 900 iron chariots, held an iron grip over all of Israel. Things were so bad that the Israelites stayed off the main roads, and life in their villages as they knew it ceased. Until Israel’s Enjoli woman came along.

Village life in Israel ceased,
ceased until I, Deborah, arose,
arose a mother in Israel. (Judges 5:7)

Wow! What a woman!

Deborah sent a message to a warlord named Barak, “God commands you to gather an army and head into the hills of Mount Tabor. God will lure Sisera into the Kishon River valley and He Himself will fight Sisera’s armies ahead of you.”

Barak is a man who has enough clout with just two tribes of Israel, that at one call 10,000 warriors join him. Barak is a man who has just been told that God Himself is going to fight Sisera alongside Barak’s forces.

But Barak is a coward!

A man with everything going for him says to Deborah, “Only if you go with me, I will go; but if you don’t go with me, I won’t go.”

All of Israel is forever grateful for that Enjoli woman who went with the army, and led them in an incredible victory.

Wow! What a woman!

I am praying that God will raise up more godly women who will boldly speak God’s word to fearful people today.

Posted in Uncategorized. Tags: , , , , , , , . 3 Comments »
« Older posts
Newer posts »