9 More Quotes From “Every Man’s Battle”

Every Man's BattleFellas, don’t use the “I’m a guy and I can’t help it” excuse for your lust or your pornography viewing. You can do better than that! Check out my review of Every Man’s Battle by clicking here, and then read some of the quotes I highlighted below.

“Regarding sexual purity, God knows the provision He’s made for us. We aren’t short on power or authority, but what we lack is urgency. We must choose to be strong and courageous to walk into purity. The millisecond it takes to make that choice, the Holy Spirit will start guiding you and walking through the struggle with you.”

“Some hard questions:

  • How long do I intended to stay ensnared?
  • How long must my family wait?
  • How long before I can look God in the eye?
  • How long are you going to stay sexually impure?
  • How long will you rob your wife sexually?
  • How long will you stunt the growth of oneness with your wife, a oneness you promised her years ago?”

“God is waiting for you. But He is not waiting by the altar, hoping you’ll drop by and talk for a while. He is waiting for you to rise up and engage in the battle.”

“Holiness is not some nebulous thing. It’s a series of right choices. You needn’t wait for some holy cloud to form around you. You’ll be holy when you choose not to sin.”

“You can expect an inner ‘urge to fail.’ You’re accustomed to satisfying a portion of your sexual hunger through your eyes, anytime and anywhere you please. Your body will fight for these highs. As you advance in purity, the part of your sexual hunger, once fed by your eyes, remains unfed and doesn’t just disappear. This demanding hunger runs to the only available pantry left to you: your wife.”

“The magazines at the supermarket checkout might say, ‘Fantasize to a better sex life.’ The talk shows may say, ‘Let variety improve your sex life—adultery can be good!’ But in God’s kingdom, obedience always ends in joy, peace, and in this case, thrills. You can count on a sexual payoff from obedience.”

“Your mind is orderly, and your world-review colors what comes through it. The mind will allow these impure thoughts only if they ‘fit’ the way you look at the world. As you set up the perimeter of defense for your mind, your brain’s world-view will be transformed by a new matrix of allowed thoughts, or ‘allowables.’ Within the old matrix of your thinking, lust fit perfectly and in that sense was ‘orderly.’ But with a new, purer matrix firmly in place, lustful thoughts will bring disorder. Your brain, acting as a responsible policeman, nabs these lustful thoughts even before they rise to consciousness. Essentially the brain begins cleaning itself, so elusive enemies like double entendres and daydreams, which are hard to control on the conscious level, simply vanish on their own.”

“God loves pop quizzes, but He doesn’t test our knowledge with them. He tests our character.”

“Great marriages may seem rare these days, but God didn’t intend it that way. By God’s way of thinking, a vibrant, cherishing relationship is quite normal and should be quite common because, believe it or not, you already have what it takes to walk faithfully. … You and your wife already have what it takes to sculpt a glorious image of Christ’s relationship to the church, a masterpiece so lovely it will draw men and women to Christ simply by their looking at the two of you together.”

You can read other quotes from this book by clicking here.

10 Quotes From “Every Man’s Battle”

Every Man's BattleGuys, you need to read Every Man’s Battle (check out my book review to find out why I say this). Fellas, we can be the men that God desires us to be! Check out some quotes from this powerful book.

“Your purity must not depend upon your mate’s health or desire. God holds you responsible.”

“Why do we find it so easy to mix our standards of sexual sin and so difficult to firmly commit to true purity? Because were used to it. We easily tolerate mixed standards of sexual purity because we tolerate mixed standards in most other areas of life.”

“While in business it’s profitable to seem perfect, in the spiritual realm it’s merely comfortable to seem perfect. It is never profitable. … Excellence is a mixed standard, while obedience is a fixed standard. We want to shoot for the fixed standard.”

“I was asking myself, ‘How far can I go and still be called a Christian?’ The question I should have been asking was, ‘How holy can I be?’”

“We have countless churches filled with countless men encumbered by sexual sin, weakened by low-grade sexual favors—men happy enough to go to Promise Keepers but too sickly to be promise keepers. A spiritual battle for purity is going on in every heart and soul. The costs are real. Obedience is hard, requiring humility and meekness, very rare elements indeed. … If we don’t kill every hint of immorality, we’ll be captured by our tendency as males to draw sexual gratification and chemical highs through our eyes. … As we ask ‘How holy can I be?’ We must pray and commit to a new relationship with God, fully aligned with His call to obedience.”

“Your body isn’t reliable for any spiritual battle, much less the battle for sexual purity and obedience. … Your body often breaks ranks, engaging in battle against you. This traitorous tendency pushes our sexual drive to ignore God’s standards. When this sexual drive combines with our natural male arrogance and our natural male desire to drift from the straight life, we’re primed and fueled for sexual captivity.”

“For males, impurity of the eyes is sexual foreplay…because foreplay is any sexual action that naturally takes us down the road to intercourse. Foreplay ignites passions, rocketing us by stages until we go all the way. God views foreplay outside marriage as wrong. … It’s critical to recognize visual sexual impurity as foreplay.” 

“If we get into sexual sin naturally—just by being male—then how do we get out? We can’t eliminate our maleness, and we’re sure we don’t want to. For instance, we want to look at our wives and desire them. They’re beautiful to us, and we’re sexually gratified when we gaze at them, often daydreaming about the night ahead and what bedtime will bring. In its proper place, maleness is wonderful. Yet our maleness is a major root of sexual sin. So what do we do? We must choose to be more than male. We must choose manhood. … Our Heavenly Father also exhorts us to be men. He wants us to be like Him. When He calls us to ‘be perfect as your Father in heaven is perfect,’ He’s asking us to rise above our natural tendencies to impure eyes, fanciful minds, and wandering hearts. His standard of purity doesn’t come naturally to us. He calls us to rise up, by the power of His indwelling presence, and get the job done.”

“The hands of Jesus…never touched a woman with dishonor. … Jesus not only never touched a woman with dishonor, He never even looked at a woman in dishonor. Could I say that? … ‘Oh, don’t be so hard on yourself,’ one might say. ‘It’s natural for a male to look. That’s part of our nature.’ But what you’re doing is stealing. The impure thought life is the life of a thief. You’re stealing images that aren’t yours. … When we’re thieves with our eyes, we’re embezzling sexual gratification from areas that don’t belong to us, from women who aren’t connected to us.”

“When God looks around, He’s not looking for a man’s man but for ‘God’s man.’ His definition of a man—someone who hears His word and acts upon it—is tough, but at least it’s clear.”

Watch for more quotes soon…

Every Man’s Battle (book review)

Every Man's BattleMen are wired differently from women (surprise!). While not all men struggle with pornography, the way men are wired makes it easier to allow lust to begin through what we see with our eyes. This is every man’s battle, and this is the reason Stephen Arterburn and Fred Stoeker have given men an essential book called Every Man’s Battle.

If you’re a guy and you say, “I never battle with lust. I can control myself,” I’d like to remind you of one piece of Scripture: If you think you are standing strong, be careful not to fall. In other words, a little humility and a little help is never a bad thing. In fact, it may just help you keep your guard up.

If you’re a guy and you say, “If the truth were known, I do battle lust quite often,” perhaps your battle with lust has even gotten the best of you, and you’ve begun sneaking a peak at things your shouldn’t be looking at. Maybe those quick peaks have even become longer looks … or even turned into a pornography problem.

In whatever category you find yourself, Every Man’s Battle is an invaluable book for men. The authors are very honest about their own struggles with lust and pornography, including the things they tried to help them kick their habit that ultimately failed. What’s presented to us in this book are successful strategies for defeating lust and eliminating pornography from our lives.

I found the strategies they shared to be practical. They weren’t just some “pray a lot and trust God” approaches, but truly things that any guy can put into practice. That’s not to say that they will be easy to do. After all, rewiring the way you’ve been used to doing things is a lot of hard work. But Stephen and Fred give you a biblical foundation, their own lives as examples, and simple next-steps that any guy can do!

There’s a workbook included, which I would recommend for guys to do with an accountability partner. I would also recommend the website We Dared (where you will meet author Stephen Arterburn) to get some daily help in your battle against lust.

GUYS: GET THIS BOOK! Your family, your church, and your community need you to be strong and victorious over lust and pornography.

Links & Quotes

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“Sins of the flesh are never to be reasoned or parleyed with; there is no more reasoning with them than with the winds…. We must fly. It is true valor in such a case to turn the back. ‘Resist the devil,’ says James, but Paul does not say ‘resist lust’; he puts it thus—‘Flee also youthful lusts.’ When warring with the legions of unrighteousness we shall need all the best powers of our renewed nature, for the conflict will be stern.” —Charles Spurgeon

John Piper and the Desiring God team have a new book available: The Joy Project. You can download the ebook version free of charge.

Detroit Tigers fans (especially those who know the history of the Tigers) will appreciate this article about Miguel Cabrera. I especially think that, in terms of a pure hitter, the comparison to Ty Cobb is right on.

The Democrats in the US House and Senate are making it more and more clear that they are interested in money and position, not in life and liberty. It is unconscionable that anyone could vote against a bill that says a baby born alive after a failed abortion should be allowed to live.

My friend, Pastor Dave Barringer, has some good thoughts on rest and burn-out. Pastors especially should take the time to read this one.

“Porn makes you think you are having sexual needs met, but really they are hollow and leave you feeling empty and lonelier than before.” Read more in this post: What it means to be pro-sex and anti-porn.

[VIDEO] John Maxwell says setbacks can be “set-ups” if we handle them correctly—

[VIDEO] J. Warner Wallace explains how human consciousness points to a Creator—

 

Links & Quotes

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“Parents! I do hope you are all endeavoring to bring your children to Christ by teaching them the things of God. Let them not be strangers to the plan of salvation. Never let it be said that a child of yours reached years in which his conscience could act, and he could judge between good and evil, without knowing the doctrine of the atonement, without understanding the great substitutionary work of Christ. Set before your child life and death, hell and heaven, judgment and mercy, his own sin, and Christ’s most precious blood; and as you set these before him, labor with him, persuade him, as the apostle did his congregation, with tears and weeping, to turn unto the Lord.” —Charles Spurgeon

“The role of God’s Word is to feed faith’s appetite for God. And, in doing this, it weans my heart away from the deceptive taste of lust. … As I pray for my faith to be satisfied with God’s life and peace, the sword of the Spirit carves the sugar coating off the poison of lust. I see it for what it is. And by the grace of God, its alluring power is broken.” —John Piper

“This triangle of truisms, of father, mother and child, cannot be destroyed; it can only destroy those civilizations which disregard it.” —G.K. Chesterton

“Have you realized that most of your unhappiness in life is due to the fact that you are listening to yourself instead of talking to yourself? Take those thoughts that come to you the moment you wake up in the morning. You have not originated them, but they start talking to you, they bring back the problems of yesterday, etc. Somebody is talking … yourself is talking to you!” —Martyn Lloyd-Jones

Planned Parenthood updates:

Ultrasounds = good for saving babies, bad for Planned Parenthood’s business.

Earlier this week I shared a list of companies who support Planned Parenthood (at least PP had listed them as supporters on its website). Here’s what these companies said when they were contacted by The Daily Signal. Good news: It appears that many of them are not supporting PP financially.

PP cartoonHopefully this cartoon doesn’t describe you… (click the link or the picture to see the rest of it).

Links & Quotes

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“A Christian mind asks questions, probes problems, confesses ignorance, feels perplexity, but does these things within the context of a profound and growing confidence of the reality of God and of his Christ.” —John R.W. Stott

“How can we expect to chase satan out of our churches, our homes, our troubled children, if we don’t pray? How can parents expect God to impart spiritual power to them when they argue, fight and gossip in front of their kids? How can they expect to possess authority when they go out drinking, and then fly into a rage when they learn their kids smoke pot?” —David Wilkerson

“An increase of love, a more perfect apprehension of Christ’s love is one of the best and most infallible gauges whereby we may test ourselves whether we have grown in grace or not. If we have grown in grace, it is absolutely certain that we shall have advanced in our knowledge and reciprocation of the love of Christ.” —Charles Spurgeon

“Actions have consequences! In the book of Genesis we read how Joseph placed his loyalty above lust when he was tempted by Potiphar’s wife. His primary concern was the preference of God when he said, ‘How can I do this great wickedness, and sin against God’ (Genesis 39:9)? The lesson we learn from Joseph is surprisingly simple: Do what pleases God. Your co-workers want to include a trip to a gentleman’s club on the evening agenda. What do you do? Do what pleases God. Your date invites you to conclude the evening with drinks at his place. How should you reply? Do what pleases God. You don’t fix a struggling marriage with an affair, a drug problem with more drugs, debt with more debt. You don’t get out of a mess by making another one. You’ll never go wrong doing what is right. Just do what pleases God.” —Max Lucado

Seth Godin has a great point: We usually tell people how to do things, but rarely do we tell them why to do things. Check out Seth’s insight here.

Links & Quotes

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“You see, growing in grace doesn’t mean doing more or greater things for God. True growth comes in doing the same things over and over, with more heart assurance that we’re doing everything for Him.” —David Wilkerson

“As males, we draw sexual gratification and chemical highs through our eyes. If viewing sensual things merely provided a flutter of appreciation for a woman’s beauty, it would be no different than viewing the awesome power of a thunderstorm racing over the Iowa cornfields. No sin. No problem. But if you’re getting sexual gratification, it defiles the marriage bed, and you’re also paying prices you may not even see. A man reaps what he sows. The one who sows to please his sinful nature from that nature will reap destruction (Galatians 6:7-8).” —Steve Arterburn

My neighbor shared this thoughtful quote with me: “What if you woke up today with only what you thanked God for yesterday?”

I love working with ICCF. We have helped on two projects in Cedar Springs already, and a third project is now in the works. Check out the wonderful family we will be helping. And if you would like to help, click here.

China’s expanding military plans are quite alarming. We must remain vigilant!

[VIDEO] Pastor Bobby Conway answers the question: What does it mean to call on the name of the Lord?

Links & Quotes

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“Most Christians never associate joy with repentance. But repentance is actually the mother of all joy in Jesus. Without it, there can be no joy. Yet, any believer who walks in repentance will be flooded with the joy of the Lord.” —David Wilkerson

“Another way the Scriptures show us that ideas have consequences is by using the word ‘therefore’ (1,039 times in the NASB).” —John Piper

“I am absolutely convinced that the gas chambers of Auschwitz, Treblinka, and Maidanek were ultimately prepared not in some ministry or other in Berlin, but rather at the desks and in the lecture halls of nihilistic scientists and philosophers.” —Victor Frankl

“Every sinner must be quickened by the same life, made obedient to the same gospel, washed in the same blood, clothed in the same righteousness, filled with the same divine energy, and eventually taken up to the same heaven, and yet in the conversion of no two sinners will you find matters precisely the same.” —Charles Spurgeon

“While there may not be spiritual oppression involved in your battle [against lust], there’ll always be opposition. The enemy is constantly near your ear. He doesn’t want you to win this fight, and he knows the lies that so often break a man’s confidence and his will to win. Expect to hear lies and plenty of them. satan’s lie: ‘You’re the only one dealing with this problem. If anyone ever finds out, you’ll be the laughingstock of the church!’ The truth: Most men deal with this problem, so no one will laugh.” —Steve Arterburn

The dangers and chaos that comes from boys being raised without a Dad.

Great article: 5 Reasons You Shouldn’t Give Up On Church.

[VIDEO] Wisconsin Rep. Sean Duffy does a masterful job in appealing to the House of Representatives to pass the bill which would outlaw abortions after the date that the pre-born baby can feel pain. The House did pass this bill! Sadly, President Obama has stated that he will veto this bill, if it ends up passing the Senate as well. Check this out…

Links & Quotes

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“Building the Church is the Lord Jesus’ primary agenda before He returns. However, for many of the followers of Christ, working to build the Church is just another thing on their ‘to-do list’ which they may or may not get to during the course of any given week. We can become so distracted by work, family, diversions, and avocations that we have precious little time or strength left for the work Jesus is most interested in pursuing. So, as long as the devil can distract us from the work of building Christ’s Church, he doesn’t need to employ more spectacular or drastic measures.” —T.M. Moore

“‘Why has sex become man’s chief stumbling block?’ But has it? Or is it only the most recognizable of the stumbling blocks? I mean, we can mistake pride for a good conscience, and cruelty for zeal, and idleness for the peace of God et cetera. But when lust is upon us, then, owing to the obvious physical symptoms, we can’t pretend it is anything else. Is it perhaps only the least disguisable of our dangers.” —C.S. Lewis

“The mystery of sanctification is that the perfections of Jesus Christ are imparted to us, not gradually, but instantly, when by faith we enter into the realization that Christ is made unto us sanctification. … It is not power to live like Jesus; it is Christ living in us, and it is His life that is seen.” —Oswald Chambers

“Even while we kill and punish we must try to feel about the enemy as we feel about ourselves—to wish that he were not bad, to hope that he may, in this world or another, be cured: in fact, to wish his good. That is what is meant in the Bible by loving him: wishing his good, not feeling fond of him nor saying he is nice when he is not.” —C.S. Lewis

7 Ways To Avoid Becoming An Adulterer

DisciplineGod said quite simple, “You shall not commit adultery” (Exodus 20:14; Deuteronomy 5:18). This entire verse is just one word in the Hebrew language—na’aph—but it packs quite a punch.

Na’aph has two dimensions to it: physical and spiritual. Physically it prohibits sexual relations between a married person and someone not their spouse. Closely related to adultery is fornication, which is unmarried people engaging in sexual activity outside the covenant of marriage. Spiritually na’aph prohibits worship of anything other than Jehovah God.

This means that an inappropriate intimate relationship on the physical level affects our spiritual relationship with God, and vice versa. That is why immoral sexual acts are almost always incorporated into the worship of false gods. But which came first? Did someone leave behind God’s design for sexuality and begin a downward slide away from Him, or did someone’s heart stray from God and the evidence was the illicit sexual acts? It starts when we leave God’s love behind (see Romans 1:21-32).

Adultery and fornication are fueled by lust. Lust is rooted in selfishness. And by it’s very definition, selfishness kills love. Adulterers and fornicators cannot truly love each other; they are only using each other to satisfy their own selfish cravings, and in so doing, they are actually abusing each other.

So here are 7 ways to avoid becoming an adulterer:

  1. Love God passionately—Mark 12:30.
  2. If you’re married, invest in your marriage—emotionally, physically, mentally, spiritually.
  3. If you’re single, develop discipline. I define discipline as choosing what you want most over what you want now.
  4. Guard your eyes—Job 31:1.
  5. Avoid tempting places—Proverbs 5:8.
  6. Fill your mind with God’s Word—Proverbs 6:20-24.
  7. Have an accountability friend—Proverbs 7:6-9.

Any sexual relationship outside of God’s prescription—one man married to one woman for life—short-circuits God’s design, so it can never fully satisfy. Adultery and fornication break God’s heart because of the damage it does to our relationship with Him and to our relationships with each other.

If you have missed any of the messages in our series The Love In The Law, you can find them all by clicking here.