Christlike Wives And Husbands

like-jesusTime after time Peter calls Christians to live a counter-cultural lifestyle. The most countercultural example we have ever seen is Jesus Christ.

Peter shows us how Jesus—in the most excruciating situation possible—lived. Heading into the torture of crucifixion…

  • He was submissive to His Father’s will
  • He remained focused on the future glory, not just the immediate pain
  • He continued to be a servant-hearted leader
  • He spoke to those around Him respectfully
  • He extended mercy to His tormentors
  • He prayed for (and purchased with His blood) His tormentors’ forgiveness

Peter then tells Christian wives and husbands they are to behave in the same way as Jesus. Wow!

More specifically Peter challenges Christlike wives to be:

  1. Submissive to their husbands—I like how the Amplified Bible says this in verse 1: “subordinate, not as inferior, but out of respect for the responsibilities entrusted to husbands and their accountability to God, and so partnering with them.”
  2. Christlike in their behavior.
  3. Distinctive by their purity.
  4. Reverent to God, by honoring the image of God in their husbands.
  5. Beautiful from the inside out.
  6. Consistently doing what is right
  7. Not swayed by fear—“do what is right without being frightened by any fear [that is, being respectful toward your husband but not giving in to intimidation, nor allowing yourself to be led into sin, nor to be harmed]” (v. 6 AMP).

Likewise Peter challenges Christlike husbands to be:

  1. Submissive to their wives—remember the in the same way phrase? That applies to the men too. Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. … Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her (Ephesians 5:21, 24).
  2. Considerate of her—the King James Version says, “dwell with them according to knowledge.” That word for knowledge means to study your wife and know what she likes and doesn’t like.
  3. Respectful in the way he treats his wife.
  4. Treating her as a partner and heir in your spiritual heritage.
  5. Understanding the part she plays in your spiritual development—“The same goes for you husbands: Be good husbands to your wives. Honor them, delight in them. As women they lack some of your advantages. But in the new life of God’s grace, you’re equals. Treat your wives, then, as equals so your prayers don’t run a ground” (v. 7 MSG).

Here are two questions I think Christian wives and husbands need to seriously consider: Are you thinking about your role as a husband or wife in biblical terms or cultural terms? If you are thinking in cultural terms, are you willing to try it God’s way?

Our Christian marriages should be “alien” to the way the world operates; they should be counter-cultural. That kind of marriage is what points people to a relationship with Jesus!

If you’ve missed any messages in this series, you may find the complete list by clicking here.

Ken Blanchard & Phil Hodges On Forgiveness

lead-like-jesus“Forgiveness is the way for a heart grounded in the unconditional love of God to respond to the imperfections of others. … EGO-driven leaders, impatient for results, are quick to judge and discount less-than-perfect efforts as failure rather than to forgive and redirect. Forgiveness is a supernatural act, not a natural response to being hurt or let down. It is an act of the will, a choice, of one who has surrendered control to a higher court of judgment. …

“The opposite of forgiveness is judgment. Your motivation for doing something is as important as what you do. In theological terms, judgment is pointing out a fault with a view to condemnation. On the other hand, discernment is pointing out a fault with a view to correction or restoration. When we withhold forgiveness, is it because we are sincerely trying to correct or restore—or is it because there is some benefit to us in condemning?” —Ken Blanchard & Phil Hodges

Links & Quotes

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“Most men are not satisfied with the permanent output of their lives. Nothing can wholly satisfy the life of Christ within His followers except the adoption of Christ’s purpose toward the world He came to redeem. Fame, pleasure and riches are but husks and ashes in contrast with the boundless and abiding joy of working with God for the fulfillment of His eternal plans. The men who are putting everything into Christ’s undertaking are getting out of life its sweetest and most priceless rewards.” —J. Campbell White

“When we are confronted with temptation, we need to remember that others are looking at us, taking their cues from us. If we take sin into our souls it will affect not only us, but them as well. The demands of neighbor-love should help us to resist temptation and, thus, continue our pursuit of the righteousness of God’s Kingdom in our lives.” —T.M. Moore

“The great thing to remember is that, though our feelings come and go, God’s love for us does not. It is not wearied by our sins, or our indifference; and, therefore, it is quite relentless in its determination that we shall be cured of those sins, at whatever cost to us, at whatever cost to Him.” —C.S. Lewis

“Do little things as if they were great, because of the majesty of the Lord Jesus Christ who dwells in thee: and do great things as if they were little and easy, because of His omnipotence.” —Blaise Pascal

“In light of Revelation 1-3, every believer must ask himself: ‘Have my good works—my Bible studies and my service—robbed me of time with Jesus? Do I still hunger for Him as I once did? Or have I lost something?’” —David Wilkerson

Can you feel the heartache? “Watching porn with my husband did the complete opposite of ‘spice things up.’”

[VIDEO] How does the Bible get passed down?

6 More Quotes From “Teamwork 101”

Teamwork 101As always, John Maxwell includes a whole bunch of great quotes from other sources to make his case. In Teamwork 101, here are a few of the quotes I enjoyed.

“Many times a day I realize how much my own outer and inner life is built upon the labors of my fellow men, both living and dead, and how earnestly I must exert myself in order to give in return as much as I have received.” —Albert Einstein

“The first method for estimating the intelligence of a ruler is to look at the men he has around him.” —Niccolo Machiavelli

“In order to have a winner, the team must have a feeling of unity. Every player must put the team first ahead of personal glory.” —Paul Bear Bryant

“The freedom to do your own thing ends when you have obligations and responsibilities. If you want to fail yourself—you can—but you cannot do your own thing if you have responsibilities to team members.” —Lou Holtz

“All getting separates you from others; all giving unites to others.” —Francis of Assisi

“No man can live happily who regards himself alone, who turns everything to his own advantage. You must live for others if you wish to live for yourself.” —Seneca

If you would like to read some of the original John Maxwell quotes from Teamwork 101, please click here.

10 Quotes From John Maxwell In “Teamwork 101”

Teamwork 101The 101 Series of book from John Maxwell is a great introduction to the many topics which he address in greater depth in other books. Here are some quotes from Dr. Maxwell which I especially enjoyed.

“I believe that insecurity, rather than poor judgment or lack of intelligence, most often causes leaders to surround themselves with weak people.”

“On good teams, trust is a nonnegotiable. On winning teams, players extend trust to one another. Initially that is a risk because their trust can be violated and they can be hurt. At the same time that they are giving trust freely, they conduct themselves in such a way to earn trust from others. They hold themselves to a high standard. When everyone gives freely and bonds of trust are developed and are tested over time, players began to have faith in one another. They believe that the person next to them will act with consistency, keep commitments, maintain confidences, and support others. The stronger the sense of community becomes, the greater their potential to work together. Developing a sense of community in a team does not mean there is never conflict. All teams experienced disagreements. All relationships have tension. But you can work them out.”

“Create an environment that unleashes new leaders.” 

“Teams that don’t bond can’t build.”

“For a team to be successful, the teammates have to know they will look out for one another.” 

“In a sport such as basketball, the players on the team recognize that scoring is what is important. When a team is more effective at scoring than the opponent, it wins. Because the team members know that, they spend their time in improving and perfecting their ability to score. That is their focus. In contrast, in many organizational settings, the team members don’t know what it means to ‘score.’ They may have a list of duties, but they don’t know how those duties go together to make a score. It would be the equivalent of a basketball player who knew how to set a pick, dribble, and pass, but who never knew all the skills were used together to score baskets. If just one player on a basketball team doesn’t know what is important to the team, it makes him ineffective. And when he is in the game, it is impossible for the team to succeed. The same is true in any organization. Anyone who doesn’t know what’s important to the team not only fails to contribute to the team, but actually prevents the team from achieving success. That is why it is so important for leaders of the team to identify what is important to the team and to communicate that information to her team members.”

“People on the team must be made to feel that they are in an environment where it is safe to offer suggestions or criticism without feeling threatened.” 

“The key to being competitive is channeling it in a positive way. If you squash it, you lose an edge that motivates you to do some of your best work. If you let it run wild, you run over your teammates and alienate them. But if you control it and directed, competitiveness can help you succeed.”

“Don’t let the personality of someone you work with cause you to lose sight of the greater purpose, which is to add value to the team and advance the organization. If that means listening to the ideas of people with whom you have no chemistry, or worse, a difficult history, so be it. Set aside your pride and listen. And in cases where you must reject the ideas of others, make sure you reject only the idea and not the person.” 

“Being an encouraging leader and leading across is not about getting your own way. It’s not about winning at all costs. It’s about winning respect and influence with your peers so that you can help the whole team win. Should you be passionate and determined, believing in yourself and your ability to contribute? Definitely. Should you hold on to your deeply held values and stand on principle when those are in jeopardy? Absolutely. But never forget that having a collaborative spirit helps the organization. When you think in terms of our idea instead of my idea or her idea, you’re probably on track to helping the team win.”

11 Quotes From John Maxwell In “Success 101”

Susscess 101John Maxwell’s 101-series of books are a great introduction to some of his other more in-depth books. As I like to explain it, the 101-level introduces you to the topic, and the 301- and 401-level classes/books take you deeper.

I am in the process of reading The Complete 101 Collection (I’ll post my review of this shortly). In the meantime, here are some quotes from Success 101 which I found thought-provoking.

“You cannot achieve what you have not defined. The problem for most people who want to be successful is not that they can’t achieve success. The main obstacle for them is that they misunderstand success.”

“What does it take to be a success? Two things are required: The right picture of success and the right principles for getting there.”

“Success is a journey rather than a destination. No matter how long you live or what you decide to do in your life, you will never exhaust your capacity to grow toward your potential or run out of opportunities to help others.” 

“Without a dream, we may struggle to see potential in ourselves because we don’t look beyond our current circumstances. But with a dream, we begin to see ourselves in a new light, as having greater potential and being capable of stretching and growing to reach it.”

“The bottom line in managing your emotions is that you should put others—not yourself—first in how you handle and process them. Whether you delay or display your emotions should not be for your own gratification. You should ask yourself, What does the team need? not, What will make me feel better?”

“The greatest enemy of good thinking is busyness.”

“Successful people face the danger of contentment with the status quo. After all, if a successful person already possesses influence and has achieved a level of respect, why should he keep growing? The answer is simple: your growth determines who you are; who you are determines who you attract; who you attract determines the success of your organization. If you want to grow your organization, you have to remain teachable.”

“Few things gain the appreciation of a top leader more quickly than an employee with a whatever-it-takes attitude. That is what successful people must have. They must be willing and able to think outside of their job description, to be willing to tackle the kinds of jobs that others are too proud or too frightened to take on. These things are what often elevate successful people above their peers.”

“Good leaders…find a way to succeed with people who are hard to work with.” 

“Successful people admit faults but never make excuses.”

“If you are successful where you are, I believe you will be given an opportunity to succeed at a higher level. … Leadership is a journey that starts where you are, not where you want to be.”

Special Guest: Bill Leach

Pastor Bill LeachI am so excited to welcome back to Calvary Assembly of God our District Superintendent Bill Leach and his wife Marilynn! Pastor Leach will be sharing a message with us this Sunday, May 17, in our 10:30am service.

After 27 years of serving our District as Superintendent, Pastor Leach is retiring at the end of the summer. We will miss his leadership, but on Sunday we will have the privilege of celebrating his faithful service.

Please don’t miss this very special service! 

Links & Quotes

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“You cannot secure the life of the church by any particular system. History shows that churches have prospered, as well as failed, under different systems. The fact is that forms of government have very little to do with the vital principle of the church. The reason why the church of God exists is not her ecclesiastical regulations, her organization, her formularies, her ministers, or her creeds, but the presence of the Lord in the midst of her; and while Christ lives, and Christ reigns, and stands and feeds His church, she is safe; but if He were once gone, it would be with her as it is with you and me when the Spirit of God has departed from us; we are weak as other men, and she would be quite as powerless.” ―Charles Spurgeon

“For this is what it means to be a king [or any leader]: to be first in every desperate attack and last in every desperate retreat, and when there’s hunger in the land (as must be now and then in bad years) to wear finer clothes and laugh louder over a scantier meal than any man in your land.” —King Lune in C.S. Lewis’ A Horse And His Boy

Another Bible study help from the great folks at The Overview Bible Project: a cool look at the book of Jude.

[VIDEO] The amazing story of Lizzie Velasquez―

Happy Birthday, Mr. Lincoln

(c) Craig T. Owens 2013

(c) Craig T. Owens 2013

On February 12, 1809, Abraham Lincoln was born, and our country was blessed with an amazing leader! This is a good day to remember the powerful words that closed Lincoln’s second inaugural address―

…The Almighty has His own purposes. “Woe unto the world because of offenses; for it must needs be that offenses come, but woe to that man by whom the offense cometh.” If we shall suppose that American slavery is one of those offenses which, in the providence of God, must needs come, but which, having continued through His appointed time, He now wills to remove, and that He gives to both North and South this terrible war as the woe due to those by whom the offense came, shall we discern therein any departure from those divine attributes which the believers in a living God always ascribe to Him? Fondly do we hope, fervently do we pray, that this mighty scourge of war may speedily pass away. Yet, if God wills that it continue until all the wealth piled by the bondsman’s two hundred and fifty years of unrequited toil shall be sunk, and until every drop of blood drawn with the lash shall be paid by another drawn with the sword, as was said three thousand years ago, so still it must be said “the judgments of the Lord are true and righteous altogether.”

With malice toward none, with charity for all, with firmness in the right as God gives us to see the right, let us strive on to finish the work we are in, to bind up the nation’s wounds, to care for him who shall have borne the battle and for his widow and his orphan, to do all which may achieve and cherish a just and lasting peace among ourselves and with all nations.

You can read his amazingly-short inaugural address by clicking here.

10 Quotes From John Maxwell In “JumpStart Your Leadership”

JumpStart Your LeadershipI always love John Maxwell’s insights into leadership. JumpStart Your Leadership is a great learning book for leaders at any level. You can read my book review by clicking here. Below are a few quotes from John Maxwell that I especially appreciated.

“Too often people associate leadership advancement with their career path. That’s the wrong paradigm. What you should be thinking about is your own leadership development! The sign of good leadership isn’t personal advancement. It’s the advancement of your team. When others succeed and your team gets better, it’s a sign that your leadership is improving.”

“Good leadership begins with leaders knowing who they are. Successful leaders know their own strengths and weaknesses. They understand their temperament. They know what personal experiences serve them well. As a result, they have developed successful work habits and understand their daily, monthly, and seasonal rhythms. They have a sense of where they are going and how they want to get there. They don’t pretend to be something they’re not. Instead they admit their shortcomings and harness their strengths. As a result, they know what they’re capable of doing, and their leadership is strong.”

“Success demands more than most people are willing to offer, but not more than they are capable of giving. The thing that often makes the difference is good leadership.”

“Let a vision for making a difference in the lives of the people you lead lift you and your people above the confines of job descriptions and petty rules.”

“The path to leadership growth requires that one stops trying to impress others to maintain their position and starts developing trust to maintain their relationships.”

“Good leaders understand that the heart of leadership is dealing with people and working with the good, the bad, and the ugly in everyone. They are able to look at hard truths, see people’s flaws, face reality, and do it in a spirit of grace and truth. They don’t avoid problems; they solve them. Leaders who build relationships understand that conflict is a part of progress.”

“Knowing what to do isn’t enough to make someone a good leader. Just because something is right doesn’t necessarily mean that people will let you do it. Good leaders take that into account, then they think and plan accordingly. And to accomplish this, you must exhibit a consistent mood, maintain an optimistic attitude, possess a listening ear, and present to others your authentic self.”

“What makes a family great isn’t what makes a team great. Families value community over contribution. Businesses value contribution over community. The best teams strike a balance.”

“Care without candor creates dysfunctional relationships. Candor without care creates distant relationships. But care balanced with candor creates developing relationships.”

“People are any organization’s most appreciable asset. Good leaders invest their time, energy, money, and thinking into growing others as leaders. They look at every person and try to gauge his or her potential for growth and lead—regardless of the individual’s title, position, age, or experience.”