Healthy Leaders Ask For Help

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Confidence can become a detriment to a leader’s growth when our confidence keeps us in a place where we refuse to ask for help. Nick Vujicic wisely noted, “An arrogant person does not ask for help and thus is helpless. An arrogant person claims to know everything and thus is clueless. A humble person attracts helpers and teachers.” 

Sadly, too many leaders think that if they admit they don’t know something, that will diminish their standing in the minds of those around them. I’ll be the first to confess that this is how I used to view myself in my leadership roles. 

But a huge breakthrough for me was in humbly admitting my need and seeing how others delighted to come alongside me to help. 

During a training time with some other pastors, I was asked what I thought about “self-help books.”  

There are many leaders that believe the lie that God helps those who help themselves. In reality, God delights in those who admit their need for help. The Bible says, “God opposes the proud, but shows favor to the humble” (James 4:6). Unhealthy or insecure leaders don’t admit their need for help, and as a result they put a lid on their leadership potential.

Swallow your pride … humbly admit your need for help … receive the help of God and others … and then watch your leadership influence grow! 

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The Craig And Greg Show: Toughen Up, Buttercup

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Recently Greg got a call from an educational institute asking him for advice on how to help their athletes “toughen up.” Unfortunately, they’re not alone, it seems like resilience is in increasingly shorter supply across the board these days. As a leader, it is your job to help instill grit into your team. Not tearing them down, but showing them that you view them with more potential.

  • [0:15] It’s time to toughen up, Buttercup! 
  • [2:54] We learn the best leadership lessons from the toughest times.
  • [4:17] Greg shares an example from coaching t-ball that applies to all our leadership roles.
  • [7:28] The temporary pain can protect us against the pain that would have derailed our leadership.
  • [8:35] A college contacted Greg about why their athletes are lacking resilience.
  • [10:12] Greg shares an insightful quote about struggling through a problem to achieve success.
  • [12:07] We define the leadership culture that will serve us and our teams best.
  • [13:34] We discuss an example from Greg’s NFL experience.
  • [14:56] Resilience can be hard to teach, but we still need to keep trying.
  • [17:54] Data from the Mayo Clinic that encourages us to develop grit.
  • [19:34] What happens to reach that have teammates who don’t show stick-to-it-iveness?
  • [21:04] A leadership separator is action over feelings.
  • [24:00] The wrong and right ways to handle disappointments.
  • [25:53] We can help coach you to bring out the resilience in yourself and your team.

Check out this episode and subscribe on YouTube so you can watch all of the upcoming episodes. You can also listen to our podcast on Spotify and Apple.

Leaders Keep Going First

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Now the leaders of the people settled in Jerusalem… (Nehemiah 11:1). 

Before inviting other people to move into the capital city with its newly rebuilt walls and gates, the leaders moved in first. 

Leaders always go first. 

And then leaders continue “firsting” even when the people seem to backslide. 

Leaders continue to remain hopeful for their friends even in those backsliding times. 

Simply stated: Leaders keep going first in following God so that they can continually be empowered to lead others in the right paths. 

A mark of a godly leader is one who keeps going first, and who keeps bringing others along on life-giving, God-honoring paths. 

This is part 71 in my series on godly leadership. You can check out all of my posts in this series by clicking here.

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Be Careful How You Arrive

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If you’ve been promoted to a new position, be very aware of how you arrive. If you come in overly confident, you could alienate your new teammates before you even get a chance to get started with them. We have an idea that will help you arrive well and make great connections right from the beginning. 

Check out this full conversation on The Craig And Greg Show by clicking here. 

Shepherd Leadership: The Metrics That Really Matter is available in print or ebook, and in audiobook through either Audible or Apple.

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Links & Quotes

Leaders always go first. I want to develop myself so that I have something to give to other emerging leaders around me. If I’m not growing, I’m not going to be able to help others. Check out this full conversation Greg and I had our on leadership podcast The Craig And Greg Show. And be sure to check out all of my videos on my YouTube channel.

“The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. It is enough if one tries merely to comprehend a little of this mystery every day. Never lose a holy curiosity.” —Albert Einstein

This is sort of gross, but kind of cool at the same time. “A new study in the journal Scientific Reports concludes that 12 severed hands discovered in 2011 at Tell el-Dab’a (the site of the ancient Hyksos capital of Avaris) constitute the first bioarchaeological evidence of the gruesome ‘trophy taking’ practice of amputating the right hands of defeated enemies.” Read more about this find here. This is a corroboration of the ‘trophy taking’ David performed for King Saul in the Bible.

The more scientists learn about Creation, the more in awe of our Creator I am! Recently, researchers have discovered even more happening inside our cells that keep everything operating optimally. And then there’s this: “Besides the origin of the eye, Darwin had a problem with the origin of flowering plants (angiosperms—plants that produce seeds within an enclosure, i.e., a fruiting plant), known as Darwin’s abominable mystery. The biblical model of origins maintains that the first forms of life created by God were land plants on Day 3 of the creation week. Land plants were fully-formed and functional—‘in the beginning.’”

Dan Reiland encourages leaders to look at their weaknesses differently. “The chinks in your armor allow you to develop empathy and compassion. They give you insight to human nature. They help you genuinely connect with people. Without these things it’s difficult to lead with God’s heart.”

I am a proud member of the Assembly of God fellowship, so I especially loved reading this report on Breakpoint:

“According to recent research by pastor Ryan Burge of eight major Protestant denominations, only the Assemblies of God has seen a steady increase in church membership since 1987. Each of the others, mostly denominations that are fully progressive theologically and culturally, are experiencing steady decline. 

“Denominations like The Episcopal Church, Evangelical Lutheran Church in America, and the Presbyterian Church (USA) began long ago to move away from orthodoxy and capitulate to new ideas about sex, gender, and marriage. On the other hand, the Assemblies of God (AG) remained committed to orthodoxy on matters of Scriptural authority, the Deity of Christ, the Resurrection, and on sexual matters. It supports the protection of life at all stages, marriage between one man and one woman, and it insists that the body determines identity as male and female. 

“Christians are constantly pressured, within the Church and without, to evolve on these issues or, we are told, we will die out. It seems however, that biblical orthodoxy draws people in. Maybe because it provides an anchor in confusing times.”

The Craig And Greg Show: Transition Gracefully

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Accepting a new position is a very exciting experience! Whether it’s a promotion in your current organization or an opportunity elsewhere, it’s very tempting to want to immediately throw your full attention into the next project. In this episode, Greg and I discuss the necessity of maintaining a balance between that excitement and recognizing that the people on your team now still need your leadership. This might create more work for you in the short term, but the long-term benefits of transitioning well will be huge for you! 

  • [0:33] Any fresh starts for leaders have to be handled thoughtfully. 
  • [1:32] We need to work hard to make sure we are leaving our previous position well.
  • [2:44] Leaders of integrity give their best effort all the way to the end.
  • [4:08] How can we maintain a humble attitude when we have been selected to be promoted to a new position?
  • [6:08] There are different things to keep in mind when moving to a new position in the same organization vs. moving to a new organization.
  • [8:02] Both of us share stories about friends who benefitted by leaving their old organizations well, and they identify what the true litmus test for leaving well is.
  • [10:14] Greg also has a negative example to share.
  • [11:03] How do senior leaders handle coworkers who leave poorly?
  • [13:06] How do we keep ourselves from being distracted by our new position while we attempt to finish well in our old position?
  • [16:15] How do we arrive well in our new position?
  • [18:35] We need to always keep in mind that we are leaving or joining a team of many—we aren’t a team of one.
  • [22:57] Finishing well is a compliment to the organization you are leaving, and beginning well is a compliment to the organization you are joining.
  • [26:03] We would love to help coach you through these types of changes—whether you are the one leaving for a new position or you are the leader who is losing a team member

Check out this episode and subscribe on YouTube so you can watch all of the upcoming episodes. You can also listen to our podcast on Spotify and Apple.

Be An “Instead” Leader

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So Jesus called them together and said, “You know that the rulers in this world lord it over their people, and officials flaunt their authority over those under them. Not so with you. Instead…” (Mark 10:42-43).

A Christlike leader is an “instead” leader. 

Instead of exercising authority, exercising humility. 

Instead of being served, serving everyone else. 

Instead of being first in line, being last in line. 

Instead of seeking recognition, seeking anonymity. 

Instead of collecting titles, collecting calluses.

Instead of receiving, giving. 

Jesus, help me to be an “instead” leader—to strive to more consistently lead like You. 

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The Attitude That Defeats Defeatism

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Some additional resources for you to go deeper on this topic:

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Facts And Hope

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As Jesus headed towards Jerusalem, Mark records, “with Jesus leading the way” (Mark 10:32).

The Greek word for “lead” is proago. The prefix pro- means before or in front, and the root word -ago means to lead oneself, to lead by accompanying, or to lead by taking hold. This means that Jesus never sends us off by ourselves. He goes before us, with us, alongside us. 

One would think that this would give the disciples great comfort. But Mark also records two unexpected responses from these men: “astonished” and “afraid.” 

The words “astonished” or “amazed” are both the same word in Greek and are used both here and just a couple of verses earlier (verse 24), when Jesus said how hard it was for a rich person to enter into the kingdom of God. That statement amazed the disciples. Now they are astonished that Jesus is going to Jerusalem. “After all,” they might be thinking, “That’s where His main antagonists are headquartered! Why would He go there?” 

It appears that the father they went on their journey, the more their astonishment morphed into fear. The Greek word here is the one for which we get the word “phobia”—the kind of fear that can paralyze us or tempt us to run away. 

There are two things that Jesus does here to help His fearful friends:

(1) He gives them the unvarnished facts: “We are going up to Jerusalem…and the Son of Man will be delivered over to the chief priests and the teachers of the law. They will condemn Him to death and will hand Him over to the Gentiles, who will mock Him and spit on Him, flog Him and kill Him….” 

(2) He gives them an unshakable assurance: “…three days later He will rise” (Mark 10:32-34). 

Leaders who want to honor Jesus in their leadership would do well to follow this example—Give your fearful friends both the facts (no matter how painful they might seem) and the unshakable hope that God is sovereignly in control. 

A mark of a godly leader is one who is striving to lead more and more like Jesus.

Let’s keep studying His life and allowing the Holy Spirit to teach us the lessons we can apply in our leadership roles. 

This is part 70 in my series on godly leadership. You can check out all of my posts in this series by clicking here.

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Links & Quotes

I have a series of nearly 70 posts on the topic of godly leadership. Here is the latest installment about going all in. Be sure to check out all of my videos on my YouTube channel.

T.M. Moore writes persuasively to Christians to encourage them to build for the future. He wrote, “For most Christians today, the Kingdom which Daniel saw, Jesus proclaimed and brought near, and the Spirit inaugurated on that first Christian Pentecost—that Kingdom is little more than a theological idea, or a distant hope. It is not a daily reality to be sought, seized, shared, and strengthened in every nook and cranny of our Personal Mission Fields. Christians today are trapped in their past or mired in their present, and they have little or no sense of what it means to build for the future so that righteousness, peace, and joy in the Spirit increase wherever they live, move, and have their being.”

Whether you know it as the Mesha Inscription, the Mesha Stele, or the Moabite Stone, this 1868 discovery is another piece of archeological evidence lending proof to the historicity of the Bible.

And another piece of research from both paleontologists and entomologists points to the Flood described in the Bible as historically viable. Researchers discovered fossilized giant ants in Canada where evolutionists claim they shouldn’t be. The Institute for Creation Research commented, “There is no need to postulate ants trekking across the Arctic to explain the distribution. Nor is there a need to inject short ‘hyperthermal’ episodes to allow passage from one continent to another. The global Flood explains what we observe the best. The warmer pre-Flood conditions and likely higher oxygen levels explain the large size of the ants. And their fossil distribution is best explained by their transport off the highest pre-Flood hills as the waters were receding.”

“If we were to look at Jesus’s death merely as a result of a betrayer’s deceit and the Sanhedrin’s envy and Pilate’s spinelessness and the soldiers’ nails and spear, it might seem very involuntary. And the benefit of salvation that comes to us who believe might be viewed as God’s way of making a virtue out of a necessity. But once you read Luke 9:51, all such thoughts vanish. Jesus was not accidentally entangled in a web of injustice. The saving benefits of His death for sinners were not an afterthought. God planned it all out of infinite love to sinners like us, and He appointed a time.” —John Piper, Love To The Uttermost reading plan on YouVersion