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Gentleness is both a safe word and an unsafe word, which makes gentleness such an indispensable trait for shepherd leaders. Check out this clip from my time on the Leading from Alignment podcast.
Here is an excerpt from the chapter that Jim Wiegand was referencing—
I mention this fruit of gentleness specifically because I think it is one of the least understood and one of the most powerful virtues in a shepherd’s life. If you go to a modern dictionary for a definition of gentleness, you might read words like kind, moderate, calm, and tame. If you dig a little deeper into the synonyms, you will discover words like meek and mild.
The Greek philosophers thought and taught extensively about the virtues. For them a virtue was a healthy tension or a balanced response between two opposite extremes. Many philosophers referred to a virtue as a “golden mean” between those extremes. For instance, the virtue of generosity might be described as the golden mean between thriftiness and lavishness; courage could be the golden mean between rashness and timidity; and purity the golden mean between prudishness and immorality.
The gentleman or gentlewoman is not a pushover. They are strong. They know what they believe in and are passionate for the truth. They know when to fight and how to fight. So gentleness becomes the golden mean between a pacifist and a fighter. Gentleness is a lion with powerful muscles, razor-sharp claws, and a jaw strong enough to snap a bone who knows how to velvet its paws and use its nearly invincible strength as a means for good. —from Chapter 3: “A Shepherd’s Gentleness”
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Craig T. Owens 