What Kind Of Lover Are You?

Listen to the podcast of this post by clicking on the player below, and you can also subscribe on AppleSpotify, or Audible. 

In Paul’s second letter to his friend Timothy, he has quite a bit to say about love—really about two kinds of love. 

For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline. (2 Timothy 1:7) 

What you heard from me, keep as the pattern of sound teaching, with faith and love in Christ Jesus. (2 Timothy 1:13) 

Flee the evil desires of youth and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart. (2 Timothy 2:22) 

But as he nears the end of this letter, he warns Timothy about an entirely different kind of love. The word “love” appears six times in a span of just three verses, with four of those times being words that are unique in all of the New Testament. This is his warning about the last days—

     But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God. (2 Timothy 3:1-4) 

In “the last days,” the negative characteristics of people will be driven by their misplaced love. They will be…

…lovers of themselves. This is a unique word in the New Testament meaning their only interest is self-interest. 

…lovers of money. These people are ambitious in their pursuit of more, more, more. They are covetous people. Luke uses this same word to describe some Pharisees “who loved money” (Luke 16:14). Literally translated, it means lovers of silver. 

…without love. People so self-focused on their pursuits that the needs of others around them scarcely enter their thoughts, even if those people are their own family members.  

…not lovers of the good. Another unique word that goes beyond simply lacking love, but being antagonistic toward people who are attempting to be loving and kind to others. 

…lovers of pleasure. This unique word means a friend of hedonism. Their pursuit is not just money, but anything that will scratch their itch. This mindset never considers whether their pursuit is healthy, worthwhile, or even injurious to others. 

…[not] lovers of God. This final unique word that Paul uses describes people who have decided to pursue anything except God. Or as the psalmist might say, there is no room for God in any of their thoughts (see Psalm 10:4). 

This is why Solomon told us to guard our heart, or to pay attention to what our heart longs for (Proverbs 4:23), and why Jesus told us to monitor our words that are revealing the pursuits that are truly in our heart (Matthew 12:34). 

Jesus identified the fulfillment of all the requirements of the law as loving God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength, and then loving our neighbor with the same care that we would love ourselves (see Luke 10:25-37). 

What kind of lover are you? 

Are you pursuing God or are you pursuing your own pleasure? 

You could gauge your love by asking these questions: 

  • What or whom do I think about the most? 
  • What do I talk about the most? 
  • What do I do more than anything else? 

We are, as Paul told Timothy, living in “the last days,” with the imminent return of Jesus. Honestly answering those three questions will help you know whether you will hear Jesus say, “Well done! Enter into your Master’s happiness” or, “Depart from Me. I never knew you.” 

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Godly Wisdom Is Wholesome

My advice is wholesome. There is nothing devious or crooked in it. My words are plain to anyone with understanding, clear to those with knowledge. (Wisdom in Proverbs 8:8-9) 

wholesome /hōl′səm/

  • Conducive to or indicative of good health or well-being. 
  • Conducive to or promoting social or moral well-being. 
  • Contributing to the health of the mind.

There is nothing as wholesome—healthy and beneficial—as the Wisdom which is found on the pages of Scripture. 

And so, my children, listen to me, for all who follow my ways are joyful. Listen to my instruction and be wise. Don’t ignore it. … For whoever finds me finds life and receives favor from the Lord. (Wisdom in Proverbs 8:32-33, 35)

Open And Shut

Open your mouth for the people who cannot speak, for the rights of all the unfortunate. Open your mouth, judge righteously, and defend the rights of the poor and needy. (Proverbs 31:8-9) 

✅ Open your mouth to speak up for others who don’t have a voice. 

If you have been foolish in exalting yourself, or if you have plotted evil, put your hand on your mouth. (Proverbs 30:32) 

🚫 Close your mouth to evil words or if you are trying to promote yourself. 

Check out some related posts:

Links & Quotes

If I want to present my best ideas, I need to be open to the helpful, sharpening critique that people close to me have to offer. My first idea sounds great, until others come along to make it better.

I have a lot of new video content on my YouTube channel every week. Please check it out and subscribe so you don’t miss anything.

“In so far as I am Man I am the chief of creatures. In so far as I am a man I am the chief of sinners.” —G.K. Chesterton 

Cold case detective J. Warner Wallace applies the same scrutiny to examining the evidence of the New Testament as he does with a suspect. “There are four critical questions that must drive our examination of any eyewitness, ancient or modern: Were they actually present to see what they claim? Can their account be corroborated in some fashion, even indirectly? Have the key elements of their story shifted over time? And finally, do they possess ulterior motives or bias that would tempt them to lie or embellish? This is not a uniquely religious or anti-religious method; it is simply good investigative practice.”

“Few men, if any, step into responsible positions without preparation. Sometimes in our shortsightedness we seem to get the idea in regard to Bible characters that they come on the scene ready-made, fully prepared; here they are, God’s gift to the world! They take up the work, and that’s all there is to it. But if you will read more carefully, you will find that usually—I think we could even say always—there is a period of preparation behind them. God lays His plans well in advance.” —William Sanford LaSor 

Praise Reveals

The crucible for silver and the furnace for gold, but people are tested by their praise. (Proverbs 27:21) 

The Message paraphrase says you can tell what’s in someone’s heart by how they react when they are praised—“The purity of human hearts is tested by giving them a little fame.”

The Amplified Bible says you can tell what’s in someone’s heart by listening to what they praise—“A man is judged by what he praises and of what he boasts.”

These are two sides of the same coin, and both are equally true. How we handle praise and what we praise both reveal what’s inside our heart. Both of these are responses to which we should pay careful attention. 

Avoiding Foolish Controversies

Listen to the podcast of this post by clicking on the player below, and you can also subscribe on AppleSpotify, or Audible. 

Jude calls Christians to contend for the faith without contention and without compromise. Instead, we are to loving serve Jesus by engaging with others mercifully, peacefully, and lovingly. This means we have to contend without quarreling. 

But that’s easier said than done because people love to pick fights, and we hate to lose an argument. 

Look at the ministry of Jesus. His adversaries couldn’t get around the perfect logic that He used based on Scripture, so they came up with all sorts of controversies in the hope of tripping Him up and silencing Him. They posed seemingly unanswerable dilemmas like: In heaven, which one of the seven brothers will be married to the woman they all married on earth? Should we pay taxes to Caesar? Should we pay the temple tax? What’s the greatest commandment of all? They tried to get Him to take the bait about religious traditions, laws concerning the Sabbath, and the punishment for a woman caught in adultery. 

Jesus never got fluster or frustrated—He never took the bait to quarrel with them, but He simply stood unwaveringly and lovingly on God’s Word. But once again, that’s easier said than done! 

King Solomon pointed out the difficulty of this in Proverbs 26:4-5. Do we answer a fool or not? Yes, but we answer wisely not foolishly. 

(Check out all of the Scriptures in this post by clicking here.)

I believe Jude would agree with Solomon, Jesus, Paul, and Peter, but then he uses three examples that could spark a controversy:  

  • the fate of fallen angels (Jude 6) 
  • Michael and the devil arguing over the body of Moses (v. 9) 
  • Enoch prophesying (v. 14) 

But notice that how Jude uses these examples by not addressing any more than what we already know from Scripture. In this way, Jude keeps this from becoming a foolish, quarrelsome controversy (v. 10). 

Notice the consistent instruction of the Bible on how to handle critics: 

  • Michael the archangel: The Lord rebuke you! (also 2 Peter 2:11) 
  • Jesus: Away from Me! (Matthew 4:10) and Get behind Me! (Mark 8:33) 
  • James: Submit to God and then resist the devil (James 4:7) 
  • Peter: speak gently, respectfully, and with a clear conscience (1 Peter 3:15-16) 
  • Paul: warn people without becoming quarrelsome (2 Timothy 2:14, 16, 23-25) 

In Luke 13:1-5, Jesus addresses two events that could have become quite controversial, but Jesus defused the controversy by simply saying, “No matter what, everyone needs to have their sins forgiven by God.” Paul continued this singleminded focus on Jesus. I love how the Amplified Bible captures his words in 1 Corinthians 2:2. And then Paul encourages his friend Timothy to operate the same way (1 Timothy 1:15-17). 

Don’t let foolish controversies sidetrack you from the faith entrusted to us, but take everything back to Jesus as He is revealed in the Scripture. 

If you’ve missed any of the other messages in our series called Earnestly Contending, you can find them all here. 

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Don’t Fear, Don’t Fret

Don’t rejoice when your enemies fall; don’t be happy when they stumble. Don’t fret because of evildoers; don’t envy the wicked. (Proverbs 24:17, 19 NLT) 

We don’t rejoice when evildoers stumble, nor do we fret when evildoers succeed. Why? Because our attention should be captivated by our Savior.

God’s peace shall be yours—that tranquil state of a soul assured of its salvation through Christ, and so fearing nothing from God and being content with its earthly lot of whatever sort that is—that peace which transcends all understanding shall garrison and mount guard over your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:7 AMPC)

God’s transcendent peace comes into our heart like an elite special forces team to guard our heart from enemies. We are the ones who welcome in this special force by being content with all God is for us in Jesus. That means we can dismiss this special force by being discontent. 

The choice is yours. 

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Walk By The Spirit

Listen to the podcast of this post by clicking on the player below, and you can also subscribe on AppleSpotify, or Audible. 

Paul makes it so clear that the Holy Spirit is a Person with Whom I should be in regular and intimate conversation. In the span of just a few verses in Galatians, Paul uses five different Greek words to fill out the definition for what it means for a Christians to walk by the Spirit. 

(Check out all of the Bible verses in this post by clicking here.) 

(1) Walk by the Spirit (Galatians 5:16). This word means to conduct my life at the Spirit’s speed. Not rushing ahead; not lagging behind. As Solomon might say, “Trust the Holy Spirit with all your heart, and do not depend on your own understanding. Seek His will in all you do, and He will show you which path to take” (paraphrase of Proverbs 3:5-6). 

(2) Led by the Spirit (5:18). This means to be attached to the One Who is conducting my life. Just like Jesus explained about branches staying connected to the Vine in John 15:1-5. 

(3) Live by the Spirit (5:25). To consider the Holy Spirit as my one and only vitalizing Source. He is more important than the air I breathe, the food I eat, or the water I drink. 

(4) Keep in step with the Spirit (5:25). I march obediently as a soldier under direction from my Superior Officer; attuned to His voice to obey His every direction. 

(5) Live by the Spirit (6:1). This describes one who is filled with and governed by the Holy Spirit’s life-force. 

Christians who live this way cannot help but exhibit the fruit of the Spirit in such abundance that their very lives become a living, breathing testimony to others of the delight in walking by the Spirit on every single step of our life’s journey (5:22-23). 

!For me, there’s no other way to live! 

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Accountability To Saints

Listen to the podcast of this post by clicking on the player below, and you can also subscribe on AppleSpotify, or Audible. 

Sanctification (saint-ification) is an ongoing process that brings out fruitfulness, joy-fullness, and enhances our testimony to others. And an essential part of this process involves other saints. Notice that this word “saints” it plural. That’s because it is a plural word every place it appears in the Bible. 

Saints have gotten themselves into trouble when they tried to go solo. Like David’s sin with Bathsheba, Elijah’s slide into depression, or Peter’s denial of Jesus. But we also see saints thriving through difficult situations when they have a fellow saint alongside. Like how Barnabas gave Saul his start, Paul and Silas could sing together in prison, Silas and Timothy helped Paul minister, and how Jesus sent out His ambassadors by twos (Luke 10:1).  

(Check out all of the Scriptures in this post by clicking here.) 

I love the names of traveling companions John Bunyan uses in Pilgrim’s Progress: Christian travels with Faithful and Hopeful; Christiana travels with Mercy and Mr. Great-heart. And we get to travel along with some really great people as well (Proverbs 27:17; Ecclesiastes 4:9-12). 

How does accountability to other saints work? Since we see togetherness so much in the early Church (look for the phrases like “each other” or “one another”), think A.C.T.S.—

(1) Admit my need for accountability. James tells us that we all stumble and that even my so-called little slip-ups are major in God’s eyes (James 3:2, 2:10). So I need help. 

John Maxwell said, “Every person is undisciplined in some area of their life; in the area that I am undisciplined, that is the area where I need greatest accountability. I will not do well in my areas of weakness unless I am held accountable for better results.” We all have blind spots, we all have weak areas, and we must be humble enough to admit to those things. 

(2) Choose my accountability partners prayerfully and carefully (Proverbs 12:26; 2 Corinthians 6:14). These should be trustworthy people who have the emotional and spiritual capacity to be able to come alongside me (Proverbs 17:9; Galatians 6:2). 

(3) Trust my friend. Trust their counsel even when it stings a bit (Proverbs 27:6), and trust the effectiveness of their prayers for me (James 5:16). 

(4) Stick with them through thick and thin. Be your brother’s keeper and let them be your keeper (Hebrews 3:12-14). We need to keep at it especially in difficult times. Notice the phrase “let us” that appears five times in Hebrews 10:19-25.  

If we are living with a biblical worldview, we realize that the saints here on earth are those we will also be with for eternity. Our biblical worldview should form our understanding of both being accountable to another saint and holding other saints accountable as well. 

As Jack Hayford so wisely noted, “The believer’s best defense against self-deception is through mutual accountability to one another.” 

If you would like to check out the other messages in our series B.A.S.I.C. Christianity, you can click here. 

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A Sharp Friend

Listen to the podcast of this post by clicking on the player below, and you can also subscribe on AppleSpotify, or Audible. 

When you’ve been hurt, you probably want someone to tell you that it was all the other person’s fault. That’s what you may want, but a true friend will tell you what you need to hear. 

The Scriptures I mention in this video are Proverbs 27:6, 17. 

Check out my book When Sheep Bite which is a helpful guide to dealing with the painful attacks from those under your care. 

You may also be interested in these related posts and videos: 

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