4 x 4

June 25, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

Have you ever heard the statement, “He’s so thick-headed you have to hit him over the head with a 4-by-4 to get his attention”? Sometimes I’m that guy.

Okay, I’m not that dense (or maybe you should check with Betsy on that), but sometimes I do need some help. Especially in the area of setting and accomplishing goals.

So Betsy and I are working on something new. We picked four goals to accomplish in the next four weeks (4 goals x 4 weeks = 4×4).

We took one verse of Scripture about the life of Jesus as our guide: And Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men (Luke 2:52). This one verse shows the balanced way in which Jesus grew, so we have set our four goals in these areas:

  • Wisdom—a mental goal
  • Stature—a physical goal
  • Favor with God—a spiritual goal
  • Favor with men—an emotional/social goal

Even though we’re only four days into our first week, having this 4×4 is really keeping me motivated and on task. I’ll give you an update when we’ve finished our four weeks.

Another thought that’s keeping me focused during this is what’s happening in me during the process of pursuing these 4×4 goals. Zig Ziglar said it this way, “What you get by achieving your goals is not as important as what you become by achieving your goals.”

Do you have any big goals you’re working on? What do you do to keep yourself motivated and focused on your goals?

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I Like People With Less

June 24, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

You would probably think that if I needed counsel or advice I would seek out someone who is well educated in the area I need help. I should probably find an expert in the matter that’s troubling me. It seems somewhat counterintuitive, but I am finding that those who know less can actually help me more.

Listen to C.S. Lewis, “The fellow-pupil can help more than the master because he knows less. The difficulty we want him to explain is one he has recently met.” He can help me more because he knows less.

I know this tends to be true when one of my children asks me to help them with something in their homework, or a friend asks my help on a computer problem she is experiencing. Because I have already worked out the steps, I no longer have to proceed sequentially; that is, I don’t have to go from Step A to Step B to Step C, and so on until I get to the answer. Because of my past experience, I can jump right to Step K.

Great for me. Totally unhelpful to those asking for my advice. In essence, I’m doing all of their thinking for them. I haven’t taught them anything, except that I’ll do their work for them.

Lately, I’ve been spending quite a bit of time with a friend who is thinking about what it means to have a relationship with Jesus. He has very, very little church background, so I have been forced to go back to Step A with him, because Steps K, L, M, and the like would make no sense to him.

This is why I love being around the unchurched, the dechurched, and the never-churched. This is why I love talking to and listening to teenagers and 20-somethings who are new to their relationship with Jesus. These fellow pupils are so recently going through situations that it really makes me pause to go back to my beginnings.

Try it yourself. There is some great wisdom in those who have “been there done that.” But I’m also getting some great insights from those who are “here now doing this.”

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A Silly Dream World Or The Real Deal?

June 23, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

“What is ‘real’? How do you define ‘real’? If real is what you can feel, smell, taste, and see, then ‘real’ is simply electrical signals interpreted by your brain. … Have you ever had a dream, Neo, that you were so sure was real? What if you were unable to wake from that dream? How would you know the difference between the dream world and the real world?” —“Morpheus” in The Matrix

We are created in God’s image. God is eternal and unrestricted, yet we are contained in finite bodies and constrained to the time-space dimension of our universe. That hardly seems “real.” Yet our souls—the “real” part of us—were made to be timeless and unbound. It seems like a dream, and yet sounds real.

To help humanity navigate the dream-real state in which we find ourselves, God gave us incredible insights into His Word: the Bible. The answers to our dream-real questions are there if we’re willing to search for them.

C.S. Lewis wrote, “What we see when we think we are looking into the depths of Scripture may sometimes be only the reflection of our own silly faces.” The Apostle James talks about God’s Word as a mirror in his letter to the church (1:22-25). In this, I see three people.

(1) One who never looks in the mirror; one who simply accepts what’s presented to him. Again “Morpheus” comes close: “You have the look of a man who accepts what he sees because he is expecting to wake up.” James says this is a man who attends church regularly, but never applies what he hears. In fact, he probably never even hears anything other than what he thinks the pastor said. That man is silly, shallow, and stunted in his spiritual growth (if there is even any growth at all!).

(2) One who looks in the mirror but doesn’t do anything about what he sees. He hears the Word of God at church and perhaps even reads his Bible often at home; he knows all the stories and how everything should be. But he, too, never makes any changes in his spiritual “appearance.” He is content with where he is. If he ever feels the pull of desire that there could be more real to his dream-real world, he quickly explains it away. He is at the same spiritual maturity level today as he was years ago.

(3) One who looks into the mirror, recognizes that he is silly-looking, and then does something about it. It’s hard work and often this man feels like he’s not growing because he continues to see his silly face reflected back to him. As Albert Einstein noted, “As a sphere of light increases, so does the circumference of darkness around it.”

James says only this third man has been freed from his dream-real constraints and is called blessed by God. Only he is beginning to understand how to make the dream real.

In which category are you? Are you brave enough to look into the depths of God’s Word and see your silly face? Are you willing to make the changes the Bible shows you to free your soul?

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Homemade = Heartmade

June 22, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

God gave you a gift of 86,400 seconds today. Have you used one to say “I love you”?

My favorite Father’s Day gifts are the homemade, personalized cards that my children make for me. Throughout the years I’ve kept a number of those close to me as bookmarkers or framed reminders on my desk. To me homemade = heartmade.

Yesterday one of my children gave me a card which had this heart-tugging line: “I love you so very because you love me.” And then there was this P.S.: “Don’t stop loving.”

On Father’s Day or Mother’s Day or birthdays, it seems easy to express our love. After a hospital stay or a near-death experience, it seems required to express our love. And that’s as it should be. But what about all the “normal” days in between?

I believe one of the greatest gifts I can give my family is a personalized, “heartmade” gift that tells the recipient that I’m thinking about them. In other words, I need to be actively and deliberately finding ways to express my heartmade love to those close to me every day.

Of the 86,400 seconds I have today, it will only take me a few seconds to:

  • Text “I love you”
  • Give a gentle squeeze or love pat as they walk by
  • Jot a quick note to pack in someone’s lunch
  • Buy their favorite candy as I’m checking out of the store
  • Stick a friendly Post-It note message to their bathroom mirror
  • Start or end their day with a hug

As Gertrude Stein wrote, “Silent gratitude isn’t very much use to anyone.”

Don’t make those close to you GUESS you love them, make sure they KNOW you love them. It only takes a second or two.

How will you use your 86,400 seconds today?

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Sharper Thoughts

June 19, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

John Maxwell said, “Some of my best thinking has been done by others.” I believe that what Dr. Maxwell was saying is that our creative thoughts can become even better when someone else helps sharpen them.

King Solomon, a pretty fair thinker himself, said the same thing when he wrote, “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another” (Proverbs 27:17). In other words, you need some pretty sharp people to help you think better thoughts, sharper thoughts.

Check out what John Stuart Mill wrote in On Liberty—

“Nor is it enough that he should hear the arguments of adversaries from his own teachers, presented as they state them, and accompanied by what they offer as refutations. That is not the way to do justice to the arguments, or bring them into real contact with his own mind. He must be able to hear them from persons who actually believe them; who defend them in earnest, and do their very utmost for them. He must know them in their most plausible and persuasive form; he must feel the whole force of the difficulty which the true view of the subject has to encounter and dispose of; else he will never really possess himself of the portion of truth which meets and removes that difficulty. Ninety-nine in a hundred of what are called educated men are in this condition; even of those who can argue fluently for their opinions. Their conclusion may be true, but it might be false for anything they know: they have never thrown themselves into the mental position of those who think differently from them, and considered what such persons may have to say; and consequently they do not, in any proper sense of the word, know the doctrine which they themselves profess.”

General George C. Marshall, chief of staff of the Army during World War II, created the largest army the world had ever seen (13 million soldiers) in the shortest time possible. General Omar Bradley tells of being called into Marshall’s office in 1939, a week after the outbreak of war in Europe. Marshall was disappointed in Bradley, “You haven’t disagreed with a single thing I have done all week!” Marshall wanted to make sure he was doing his very best so he was calling on another sharp comrade to challenge his thinking.

Do you have some sharp people around you? Do you listen to those who disagree with you? If you do, your creative thoughts can become even sharper.

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Doing Thinking Doing

June 18, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

To think or to act? That is the question. Or maybe the question should be, which comes first: the thinking or the acting? Do I think about something and then go do it? Or do I do something first and then think about what I’ve done and how I could do it better next time?

The answer, I believe, is yes.

You could be the most creative thinker in the world, your thoughts could be off on another plane, but if you do nothing with what you’re thinking, all of those great insights are wasted.

On the other hand, many people hold to the axiom that experience is the best teacher, so they just do and do and do. But experience is not the teacher; we only learn when we stop to think about what we’ve done.

William Wilberforce was already a rising star in British politics when he experienced a deeper understanding of his relationship to God. Suddenly this man of word and action wanted to do nothing more than meditate on the greatness of God. Wilberforce believed that he could best serve God by withdrawing from society and simply thinking about God.

His good friend and future prime minister William Pitt disagreed. Pitt wrote to Wilberforce, “Why then this preparation of solitude which can hardly avoid tincturing the mind either with melancholy or superstition? … Surely the principles as well as the practice of Christianity are simple and lead not to meditation but to action.” Or as the line from Amazing Grace has it, “We humbly suggest you can do both.”

I love Oswald Chambers’ counsel—

“God will never allow us to divide our lives into sacred and secular, into study and activity. We generally think of a student as one who shuts himself up and studies in a reflective way, but that is never revealed in God’s book. A Christian’s thinking ought to be done in activities, not in reflection, because we only come to right discernment in activities.”

Whether it starts with thinking or starts with action, successful thinking-doing must include both. Think about it → act on it → think about your results → do it again better than last time.

Paul wrote to the Romans how thinking and action work together when he said, “for their own conscience and thoughts either accuse them or tell them they are doing right” (Romans 2:5 NLT). The Amplified Bible renders this phrase, “their consciences (sense of right and wrong) also bear witness; and their decisions (their arguments of reason, their condemning or approving thoughts) will accuse or perhaps defend and excuse them.”

Think about it → do it → think about it → do it = the pattern for success.

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I’ll Make You An Offer You Can’t Refuse (Book Review)

June 17, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

I'll Make You An Offer You Can't RefuseOkay, I’ll be honest with you, the title of Michael Franzese’s latest book sounds like a cliché—I’ll Make You An Offer You Can’t Refuse. Sounds like a line right out of “The Godfather” or “Goodfellas,” right? But if you’re involved in the world of business, Mr. Franzese’s book is exactly that: an offer (book) you can’t refuse. From how to craft a business plan, to picking the right people, to learning how to negotiate the best deals, Mr. Franzese uses his years of wiseguy street-smarts to give you an advantage.

From the very first page, this book engaged me because I felt like I was having a conversation with the author. His style is very relaxed, and his stories about his business successes and failures are compelling. It’s not often that a business book reads like a novel, but I’ll Make You An Offer does just that.

Throughout all of his lessons, Mr. Franzese makes the contrast between the principles spelled out in the mobster’s bible (The Prince by Machiavelli) and principles articulated in the Holy Bible (specifically the writings of Solomon). Although he learned his strategies from his years in La Cosa Nostra (“this thing of ours” or the mob life), he makes a strong case his strategies will work in the legit life. The difference is the motivation that drives the strategies: Machiavellian or biblical.

“A dictionary definition of success says it’s ‘the favorable or prosperous termination of attempts or endeavors.’ … But dictionary definitions are like sausage casings. It all depends on what you stuff inside” (quote from page 144).

Whether you are just getting started in a new business venture, or whether you are not satisfied with the results of your current business venture, you will find invaluable strategies here to help you. This former mob boss truly does make you an offer you can’t refuse.

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Are You Out Of Your Mind?

June 17, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

I love this thinking thought from James William Fulbright—

“We must dare to think ‘unthinkable’ thoughts. We must learn to explore all the options and possibilities that confront us in a complex and rapidly changing world. We must learn to welcome and not to fear the voices of dissent. We must dare to think about ‘unthinkable things’ because when things become unthinkable, thinking stops and action becomes mindless.”

After you have identified the negative thoughts and you have started thinking creatively, you have to be able to take it further. You have to be able to think unthinkable things.

Too many times we don’t let our minds begin to go into “unknown” places, so we look at everything through the lens of what we’ve experienced in the past. Our thoughts are “in our minds.” When Albert Einstein began to propose that there were more dimensions to our universe than scientists had previously thought, people had a hard time following his reasoning. Even those in the scientific community thought he was “out of his mind.”

One of Einstein’s favorite books was called Flatland. In this book, Square lives in the two-dimensional world that Sphere came to visit. Because Square’s world only has length and width (no height), he can only see the part of Sphere that was on his level. As Sphere moves through Flatland, Square can see different parts of him, but he can never see all of him at the same time. If Sphere moves above Flatland, Square can still hear his voice but cannot see his shape.

So, too, with us. Many times we only perceive what moves through the “line of sight” we have previously experienced. We are—so to speak—in our minds.

But look what God has in store for you—

No eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no mind has imagined what God has prepared for those who love Him. (1 Corinthians 2:9 NLT)

So here’s how Scripture teaches us to pray—

I pray that from His glorious, unlimited resources He will empower you with inner strength through His Spirit. Then Christ will make His home in your hearts as you trust in Him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now all glory to God, who is able, through His mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think.(Ephesians 3:16-20 NLT)

God wants to do infinitely more than you can ask or think. He wants to show you new dimensions of His greatness and His love—notice that Paul goes out of his way to list four dimensions (wide, long, high, deep) even though we live in a three-dimensional world.

Here’s the question: are you OUT of your mind or IN your mind? In other words, are you only looking for things that you know can happen, or are you believing God for things that are completely OUT OF YOUR MIND?

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Get Your Mind Out Of That Rut!

June 16, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

“Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking.” —Apostle Paul (Romans 12:2, The Message)

It’s important to think about your thinking—to analyze why certain thoughts are swirling through your mind. But after you identify unhealthy thoughts, you need some creative thinking to be able to move your life in a new direction. This requires a whole new set of thinking skills that are called critical thinking.

Stephen Brooking described it this way, “Critical thinkers are continually exploring new ways of thinking about their lives…. Critical thinking is complex and frequently perplexing, since it requires the suspension of belief and the jettisoning of assumptions previously accepted without question.”

  • What have you accepted without question?
  • What have you become so well-adjusted to that you simply accept it?
  • Are there things you do just because it’s always been done that way?
  • Are there some things that you won’t try because it’s never been done that way?

Two warning signs in your thinking are always and never. With the exception of God, everything changes. So when you start thinking in terms of always and never you are essentially saying, “Nothing changes. And I’ve got everything figured out.” This is mind-in-the-rut thinking!

You’ve probably heard this before but it is valuable enough to be repeated—If you always do what you’ve always done you’ll always get what you always got.

If you need a change in your life, start with a change in your thinking. Ask God to help you think in new ways. In talking to His people about what He had done for them in the past God said it was time to think in creative ways—

But forget all that—it is nothing compared to what I am going to do. For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland. (Isaiah 43:18-19 NLT)

Don’t let your thinking stay stuck in a rut. Allow God to help you jettison the old ways of thinking and expand your horizons. God will give you greater creativity if you ask Him.

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Thinking About What You’re Thinking About

June 15, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

When was the last time you thought something new for the first time? Atheist Bertrand Russell said something painful, but true, “Most men would rather die than think. Many do.”

I’ve written before about the most important and most lengthy conversation all of us have every day. It’s the conversation we have with ourselves—it’s called thinking. But for many people, their thinking is stuck in a rut.

I’ve often had conversations with people bucking against a new thought where I have asked them why they believe what they believe. Far too many times they tell me, “That’s just the way I was raised.” Okay, but what do you think about it? “I don’t know. That’s just the way I was raised.”

Two books that have really helped my thinking are As A Man Thinketh (James Allen) and Thinking For A Change (John Maxwell). Allen uses the analogy of our minds as gardens where we need to constantly pull out the weeds and plant the thoughts that will bear the fruit we desire. Maxwell challenges us to look differently at the way we think our thoughts.

The Apostle Paul tells us to take captive every thought and make it obedient to Christ (2 Corinthians 10:5). And then we can begin to change the way we think: Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise (Philippians 4:8).

“Rarely do we find men who willingly engage in hard solid thinking. There is an almost universal quest for easy answers and half-baked solutions. Nothing pains some people more than having to think.” —Martin Luther King, Jr.

If your thinking is ever going to go to a higher level it has to start with this: You have to be willing to think about what you’re thinking about.

In other words, why are you thinking what you’re thinking? Start capturing the thoughts running through your mind and ask them, “Why are you here?” Are you thinking what you’re thinking because you thought it, or because someone else thought it for you?

It is only by capturing the thoughts that are already in your head that you can sort out the healthy thoughts from the unhealthy thoughts.

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