For Men Only (book review)

After nearly 21 years of marriage, I thought I had my wife pretty well figured out, but Shaunti & Jeff Feldhahn made me second-guess that belief in For Men Only.

This book is the compilation of surveys, focus group discussions, and lots of highly revealing emails and letters from women all over the country. Then Jeff & Shaunti dig through all of the data to help us guys figure out what’s really going on inside the hearts and minds of the special women in our lives.

Although there were a lot of statistics and bar charts throughout the book, For Men Only is not a dry academic book. On the contrary, the Feldhahns make these results so “livable” for all of us clueless men. The bottom line: when we guys try to understand and communication with the women in our lives the same way we understand and communicate with other guys, we’re setting ourselves up for a lot of frustration.

In the famous “love chapter” in the Bible (1 Corinthians 13), the Apostle Paul implies that love should always be maturing. And when the Apostle Peter says that men should live considerately with our wives, he is really saying that we should live with ever increasing knowledge of them. For Men Only is really helping me do this, and I believe it will help any other men who are serious about continuing to understand their wives better so they can love them more deeply.

A great read for every guy!

I am a Multnomah book reviewer.

What Are You Whispering?

Wise King Solomon gave us this advice:

Never say anything that isn’t true. Have nothing to do with lies and misleading words. (Proverbs 4:24)

Most decent people don’t have an issue with this one. We would never dream of whispering to someone we care about things like…

  • …you’re a loser.
  • …you can’t seem to do anything right.
  • …hey, stupid, nice job. Not!

But the verse just before says this:

Be careful how you think; your life is shaped by your thoughts. (v. 23)

I wonder how many times we whisper words like loser, failure, or stupid to ourselves. The things we’d never say to someone else, we seem all too ready to say to ourselves!

What are you whispering to yourself? Listen closely. Are you whispering things to yourself that you would never whisper to someone else? Then it’s time to start whispering something new.

Solomon preceded this with these words of affection that seem to come right from our Heavenly Father’s mouth:

My child, pay attention to what I say. Listen to my words. Never let them get away from you. Remember them and keep them in your heart. (vv. 20-21)

God’s Spirit will never, ever, EVER speak cutting, hurtful, unkind, or untrue words to you. God loves you as if you were the only person on earth to love! He loves you so much that He sent His Son to rescue you.

Listen closely because He’s saying it right now, “I love you!

Yeah, whisper that to yourself instead!

A Collection Of Wednesdays (book review)

A Collection Of Wednesdays is written by Amy Gaither Hayes, who describes herself as, “I am not One Who Must Write; I am One Who Can Write When She Must.” The One Who Can Write When She Must has delivered a book that is part memoir, part observation, and part poetry.

Arranged into fourteen distinct sections, Amy sometimes tell a story about her life, and sometimes shares with the reader what she is observing around her each week. Then each section is wrapped up with a couple of poems she has written about that particular subject. Her writings are an honest, fresh look at how we process the people and events in our lives who have gone into shaping who we have become (and are becoming).

The title of the book comes from Amy’s weekly writing time, which I think would be an appropriate way to read this book: one section each week, giving yourself time to reflect on not only Amy’s insights, but your thoughts about your own past, present, and future.

I am a Zondervan book reviewer.

Twenty-two

There’s just no other way to say this: Resurrection Sunday at Calvary Assembly of God was AWESOME!

So many people ministers made the day a meaningful and memorable experience of what Christ’s resurrection from the dead really means. I my church!

Here are some of the comments people shared with us yesterday:

  • It really showed what Jesus did for us
  • It was a cool and interesting way to learn about Jesus
  • Really epic!
  • That was one of the very best dramas I’ve ever seen!
  • Absolutely awesome! I finally went to a real resurrection celebration!
  • Anointed words this morning
  • Loved the dramas—very powerful
  • Powerful example in a modern-day setting of an old, wonderful Bible fact!

But the best feedback of all…

Twenty-two people accepted Jesus as their Savior!

Because Jesus defeated sin and death—because He is The Champion—we robbed hell of 22 souls!

Where, O death is your victory now?!? You have been defeated and Jesus is the Champion!

Paid In Full

It was so incredible to celebrate Good Friday with all of the other churches in Cedar Springs!

The worship team was anointed … the Paid In Full drama was powerful … Communion was meaningful … which made the whole evening so memorable.

The Cross: Cruel & Wondrous

   There was no more terrible death than death by crucifixion. Even the Romans themselves regarded it with a shudder of horror. Cicero declared that it was “the most cruel and horrifying death.” Tacitus said that it was a “despicable death.” It was originally a Persian method of execution. It may have been used because, to the Persians, the earth was sacred, and they wished to avoid defiling it with the body of an evil-doer. So they nailed him to a cross and left him to die there, looking to the vultures and the carrion crows to complete the work. The Carthaginians took over crucifixion from the Persians; and the Romans learned it from the Carthaginians.

Crucifixion was never used as a method of execution in the homeland, but only in the provinces, and there only in the case of slaves. It was unthinkable that a Roman citizen should die such a death. Cicero says: “It is a crime for a Roman citizen to be bound; it is a worse crime for him to be beaten; it is well nigh parricide for him to be killed; what am I to say if he be killed on a cross? A nefarious action such as that is incapable of description by any word, for there is none fit to describe it.” It was that death, the most dreaded in the ancient world, the death of slaves and criminals, that Jesus died.

The routine of crucifixion was always the same. When the case had been heard and the criminal condemned, the judge uttered the fateful sentence: Ibis ad crucem, “You will go to the cross.” The verdict was carried out there and then. The condemned man was placed in the centre of a quaternion, a company of four Roman soldiers. His own cross was placed upon his shoulders. Scourging always preceded crucifixion and it is to be remembered how terrible scourging was. Often the criminal had to be lashed and goaded along the road, to keep him on his feet, as he staggered to the place of crucifixion. Before him walked an officer with a placard on which was written the crime for which he was to die and he was led through as many streets as possible on the way to execution. There was a double reason for that. There was the grim reason that as many as possible should see and take warning from his fate. But there was a merciful reason. The placard was carried before the condemned man and the long route was chosen, so that if anyone could still bear witness in his favor, he might come forward and do so. In such a case, the procession was halted and the case retried. —William Barclay, Commentary on John

When I survey the wondrous Cross

On which the Prince of Glory died

My richest gain I count but loss

And pour contempt on all my pride.

—Isaac Watts

Can You Hear Him?

They said she’s not worthy
with words so unkind.
They said she’s not respectable;
God said, “She’s Mine.”
I hear the voice of Jesus,
I hear the voice of my Lord,
I hear the voice of my Savior
saying, “My child, I adore you.
I hear you call My name in desperation.
I hear you call My name in praise.
I hear you call My name in worship.
I hear each time that you pray.
I know that you love Me.
I know that on Me you depend.
It’s for you My Son I did send.”
So lift your hands and heart toward heaven
when life seems unable to bear.
There’s a wooden Cross on Calvary
proving Someone cares.
Listen to the voice of Jesus.
Listen to the voice of the Lord.
Listen to the voice of the Savior.
A home in heaven will be your reward.

—Betty Ann King, I Hear Him

I pray that today you can hear Jesus calling your name and saying, “You are mine; I paid an incredibly high price to show you how much I love you!”

Untamed (book review)

A friend introduced me to the writings of Alan Hirsch, and I’m so glad he did! Co-written with his wife Debra, Untamed resonated with me on so many levels.

Untamed is about discipleship the way it should be; not the way those in Christendom have made it. It’s about viewing our lives as an integrated whole; not the part-Christian, part-other roles in which we tend to operate. It’s about seeing the Church operate as a living, breathing, loving organism; not as an only-meets-once-a-week organization.

There were parts of this book that made me say, “Yes! That’s what I want to be a part of.” There were other parts that made me pause and say, “Hmmm, I never thought of it like that before.” And there were still other parts (honestly) that I said, “That’s a bit too radical for me to try right now.”

If you’re tired of clichéd “Christians” or the same-old-same-old “church,” Untamed will probably resonate with you. At the end of each chapter are some great discussion questions, which will help you begin to see discipleship in a new light.

If, however, you think the church and Christendom are doing just fine, then stay far away from Untamed, because you just might begin to think otherwise!

As for me, I loved this book!

Thursdays With Oswald—Hate Properly

This is a weekly series with things I’m reading and pondering from Oswald Chambers. You can read the original seed thought here, or type “Thursdays With Oswald” in the search box to read more entries.

Hate Properly

     A Quaker friend of mine referring to a certain man said he did not like him because he did not hate properly. … The Christian standpoint should be one of positive anger when anyone is made to stumble. To remain indifferent when there is injustice abroad is to come under the curse of Meroz, who “came not to the help of the Lord…against the mighty” (Judges 5:23).

From Baffled To Fight Better

There are six things the Lord hates, seven that are detestable to Him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked schemes, feet that are quick to rush into evil, a false witness who pours out lies and a man who stirs up dissension among brothers. (Proverbs 6:16-19)

But if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea. (Matthew 18:6; Mark 9:42; Luke 17:2)

And the word of the Lord came again to Zechariah: “This is what the Lord Almighty says: ‘Administer true justice; show mercy and compassion to one another. Do not oppress the widow or the fatherless, the alien or the poor. In your hearts do not think evil of each other.’ But they refused to pay attention; stubbornly they turned their backs and stopped up their ears. They made their hearts as hard as flint and would not listen to the law or to the words that the LORD Almighty had sent by his Spirit through the earlier prophets. So the Lord Almighty was very angry.” (Zechariah 7:8-12)

It’s time for us to get positively angry and hate the things that God hates.

Progressing From . To ? To !

There is a progression that I believe Christians should be aware of as they lead others toward Christ.

First: .

Those who have been de-churched, or who have had a negative experience with another Christian, or who have become disenchanted with the Church, make factual statements about Christians and Church.

“The Church is….

“Christians always….

But if are truly the salt of the earth and the light of the world, we can season and shine in a way that will cause them to question their own factual statements.

Next comes: ?

“The Christian Church exists to reveal God and to utter forth His praise, to make God known to men who know Him not, that in the presence of the revelation they may be filled with awe, and wonder, and amazement—to make God known, that God shall be attractive to humanity.” —G. Morgan Campbell

This is Church?

You’re a Christian?

Which leads to: !

Jesus stated that the greatest of all commandments—indeed the fulfillment of all the commandments—was loving God with all of our heart, soul, mind, and strength and then loving others as we love ourselves. Once people see Christians as true representations of Christ … people so intent on loving God and loving others, they too will find what their hearts have been longing for.

“This is what I’ve been looking for!

“Now this is what I call a real Church!

Can I suggest an easy place to start? With your smile. Look at what Job said:

Men listened to me expectantly, waiting in silence for my counsel. After I had spoken, they spoke no more; my words fell gently on their ears. They waited for me as for showers and drank in my words as the spring rain. When I smiled at them, they scarcely believed it; the light of my face was precious to them. (Job 29:21-24)

Living in this way can move people from close-minded skeptics, to curious questioners, to enthusiastic followers of Jesus Christ. Let’s do this!