When Work & Family Collide (book review)

Anyone NOT have a busy life? If your life is dull or uneventful, then you can stop reading this book review right now. However, if you have a full, busy life, you need to make the time to read When Work & Family Collide by Andy Stanley.

The subtitle of this book says it all: Keeping your job from cheating your family. The premise of this book is quite simple—you cannot fully satisfy both your office and your family, so someone is going to have to get cheated. In the introduction to the book, Andy Stanley says,

“Daily we decide to shortchange one thing in order to more fully experience another. …So we “cheat.” We give up certain opportunities for the sake of others. We invest in some relationships while neglecting others. We allocate our time the best we can, knowing all the while that somebody’s going to feel cheated. Unfortunately, that “somebody” is usually someone we care a great deal about.”

Pastor Stanley then goes on to outline why it’s so important that work gets cheated and not our families. One of my favorite quotes in the book is, “You do your job. You love your family. It’s when we reverse the order that the tension escalates and the tug of war begins.”

Like me, you may be thinking, “But I can’t ‘cheat’ on work! I’ll lose my job!” Using the biblical example of Daniel and some very practical advice, Andy Stanley helps you to see how you can keep your priorities in order, and make the adjustments that will help you do your job and love your family.

This book has some amazing thoughts, but it’s also a surprisingly easy read. In your busy, go-go-go schedule, you would be wise to make some time on a weekend to read this book, work through the discussion questions at the back of the book with your family, and then make the changes that will help both your work and your family to thrive. Everyone will benefit from this investment of your time.

I am a Multnomah book reviewer. Check out some of the quotes I shared from this book here.

Thursdays With Oswald—Guard Your Heart With Your Head

This is a weekly series with things I’m reading and pondering from Oswald Chambers. You can read the original seed thought here, or type “Thursdays With Oswald” in the search box to read more entries.

Guard Your Heart With Your Head

     The Bible puts the head in the prominent position, not the central position; the head is the “finish off,” the manifestation of what the heart is like; the outward expression of the heart, as a tree is the outward expression of the root. This is the relationship between the head and the heart which the Bible reveals. …

     In dealing with the Bible the danger is to come to it with a preconceived idea, to exploit it, and take out of it only what agrees with that idea. If we try, as has been tried by psychologists, to take out of the Bible something that agrees with modern science, we shall have to omit many things the Bible says about the heart. According to the Bible the heart is the center: the center of physical life, the center of memory, the center of damnation and of salvation, the center of God’s working and the center of the devil’s working, the center from which everything works which molds the human mechanism. 

From Biblical Psychology

Oswald Chambers was a holistic thinker: he knew the role of the Holy Spirit and the role of psychologists; he saw how the mind, spirit, and soul worked interdependently with each other. He never suggested that psychological issues be repaired with spiritual methods, nor that spiritual concerns be addressed by psychology.

But he also saw how easy it was to make heart matters (spiritual) concerns which should be addressed as head matters (psychological). The Bible says, “Above all else guard your heart, for from it flow all of the issues of life” (Proverbs 4:23).

So how do I guard my heart? Part of guarding my heart does start with my head: I need to think about what’s going into my heart. But, as Oswald Chambers says, the head is just the “finish off” of what is happening in the heart. So ultimately, to keep my head in the right place, I need to guard my heart. I need to make my heart exclusively the home of the Holy Spirit, and allow Him free access to all of the concerns in my heart.

This is the only way I can “finish off” the right way.

7 Quotes From “Dreaming In 3D”

It was hard to narrow down the list to just these quotes, but these seven quotes from Dreaming In 3D by Doug Clay will give you a good feel for this empowering book. You can read my complete review by clicking here.

Unless otherwise noted, the quotes are from Doug Clay:

“The poorest of all men is not the one without a nickel to his name. He is the fellow without a dream.… [He is like] a great ship made for the mighty ocean but trying to navigate in a millpond.” —Kenneth Hildebrand

“For me, a healthy view of God’s dream and of becoming His masterpiece begins by avoiding comparison—in fact, carefully defining who I’m not. I can certainly learn by observing the talents and failures of others, but God didn’t call me to be a carbon copy of them. He created me to be an original edition. If I spend my time comparing my status to others and checking where I am on the acceptability scale, my focus is entirely on me, not on God and His purposes. …Most of the time, comparison produces either pride (if I think I’m doing better than others) or discouragement (if I’m not doing as well). In other words, comparison kills.”

“The works of monks and priests, however holy and arduous they may be, do not differ one whit in the sight of God from the works of the rustic laborer in the field or the woman going about her household tasks, but… all works are measured before God by faith alone. …Indeed, the menial housework of a manservant or maidservant is often more acceptable to God than all the fasting and other works of a monk or priest, because the monk or priest lacks faith.” —Martin Luther

“People matter. Christ didn’t die for a cause; He died for people. The focus of a God-given dream is never about the size of an organization, the wealth we earn, or the fame we gain from success. It’s touching people’s lives.”

“What a man actually needs is not a tensionless state but rather the striving and struggling for some goal worthy of him. What he needs is not the discharge of tension at any cost, but the call of a potential meaning waiting to be fulfilled by him.” —Victor Frankl

“In the Trinity, the Father, Son and Holy Spirit love each other and work to accomplish Their unified purposes. God wants us, His Body, to work together to fulfill the dreams He puts on our hearts.”

“No one is outside of God’s incredible dream. Without Jesus, we’re just playing games to impress and control. But when He infuses our lives with love and purpose, we become His partners in the great adventure.”

Happy Independence Day

“I am apt to believe that it will be celebrated by succeeding generations as the great anniversary festival. It ought to be commemorated as the day of deliverance, by solemn acts of devotion to God Almighty. It ought to be solemnized with pomp and parade, with shows, games, sports, guns, bells, bonfires, and illuminations, from one end of this continent to the other, from this time forward forever more.”

(John Adams, writing to his wife Abigail about the Declaration of Independence)

I hope you will take time today to celebrate the blessings of liberty that we enjoy in the United States of America. But as you celebrate, do not forget that our freedom relies solely on the grace of God Almighty. If we forget that important fact, we are doomed to lose the precious gift of liberty.

True Vine (book review)

In my personal Bible reading time, I tend to go rather slowly. I enjoy digging into the words and phrases, the Greek or Hebrew definitions, and the deep truths that can be uncovered in each verse. If you enjoy this type of in-depth Bible study, I think you will enjoy True Vine by Andrew Murray.

True Vine is a 30-day study of John 15:1-16, where Jesus talks about His relationship with us and with the Father, and our relationship with the Father in the language of a vine, branches, and fruit. It may seem like a full month just studying 16 verses is a bit intense, but Andrew Murray’s insights are very easy to grasp.

Each day’s study is not too long, but he pulls out a few insights that are ready-made to apply to your life. And each day’s devotional ends with a prayer that pulls it all together.

It was a very enjoyable study for me. You will enjoy it too, only if you want to go deep.

If you have a Kindle, you can download True Vine for free by clicking here.

[I shared some quotes from this book here.]

Do You Want To Be A (Better) People Pleaser?

I know a lot of people who want to please others. This pursuit, however, can get you into hot water. For instance, when you need to confront a friend on their poor behavior. Or when someone doesn’t properly express their appreciation to you for appreciating them.

The Bible gives us a better way to be a people pleaser. 

Paul wrote: So we make it our goal to please [God]… (2 Corinthians 5:9).

Instead of goal, the King James Version says, “we labor.” If it is labor, then it truly is a labor of love: work that is challenging, but rewarding. In fact, the rewards are so overwhelming, that the sweat of labor is quickly forgotten.

The Greek word for labor/goal means work that is activated by the love of honor, and so it brings forth our very best effort.

I desire to honor God and please Him, and I desire to be honored by God and find my full pleasure in Him. After all, as the Westminster Catechism says, “The chief end of man is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever.”

So my labor of love is activated first by my love for God; and secondarily by my love for others. Isn’t this what Jesus gave us as the Great Commandment (see Luke 10:27)?

It is God Who has made us for this very purpose [to enjoy Him forever] and has given us the Spirit as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come [honor and eternal pleasure]. (2 Corinthians 5:5)

The Holy Spirit helps activate and direct my labor of love. The Spirit uses my labor of love to draw others to Christ; the Spirit assures me that my labor of love is bringing honor and pleasure to the Father. And in that knowledge, I find my pleasure to continue to labor in love.

So if I want to please people, my goal must be a labor in love that pleases God. Out of the knowledge of His pleasure and honor, I am better prepared to present a labor of love to others.

God pleaser (first) → People pleaser (as an overflow) 

The better we please God, the better we’ll please people.

Dreaming In 3D (book review)

Everyone has a dream. Maybe you’ve forgotten yours, or maybe you are struggling with how to achieve your dream. Maybe your dream seems a bit muddled, and you’re not sure how to proceed. In any of these cases Dreaming In 3D: Finding And Following God’s Amazing Plan For Your Life by Doug Clay is an excellent resource.

The thing I appreciate most about this book is its affirming tone. I never felt like Doug was talking down to me, or belittling my dreams, or even making me feel like my dreams were unrealistic. Using both his personal life story of following the dream God had birthed in his heart, biblical examples of dreamers, and practical steps for achieving your dream, Dreaming In 3D was enjoyable at every page.

Doug’s focus is not on pursuing selfish dreams, but dreams which help others:

“People matter. Christ didn’t die for a cause; He died for people. The focus of a God-given dream is never about the size of an organization, the wealth we earn, or the fame we gain from success. It’s touching people’s lives.”

In addition to helping you find and follow your own dream, Doug also encourages us to be dream releasers for other dream chasers. In so doing, we please God.

Are you ready to find and follow your dream? Are you ready to help others pursue their dreams as well? If so, Dreaming In 3D will help you do just that.

[Check out some quotes I shared from this book here.]

I Want To Be Fascinated

If we are going to stick with anything for the long haul, we have to be fascinated by it. As soon as it becomes boring, humdrum, or monotonous, the downward spiral leading to us throwing in the towel is almost inevitable.

It looks like this:

Inattention → Fizzled passion → Lack of discipline → Quitting

This is bad enough for a diet, exercise routine, or any other healthy pursuit. But it becomes even more painful when this downward cycle occurs in our spiritual life. In that case, the “quitting” is called by another name: Sin.

In Psalm 119, the Beth section (verses 9-16) opens with two contrasting thoughts:

  • How can a young man keep his way pure? By LIVING according to Your Word.
  • I seek You with all my heart; do not let me STRAY from Your commands.

Stray is a passive word. No real attention or foresight is required to wander or meander around. On the other hand, living is an active word. In the Hebrew, this word carries the idea of keeping careful watch; protecting; carefully tending.

So the question that leads to my success is this: What fascinates me? What dominates my thoughts? What motivates me?

The answer to these questions will determine my stick-to-itiveness.

The remaining verses in this section show the upward spiral away from sin if we will keep careful watch over how closely we stick to God’s Word.

  • Living = guarding (v. 9)
  • Seek You with all my heart (v. 10) … Yearning (in the Amplified Bible)
  • Hidden Your Word (v. 11) … Treasured (in the Complete Jewish Bible)
  • → Personal praise (v. 12)
  • With my lips… (v. 13) = verbal, public praise
  • Rejoice (v. 14) … as in more than in any kind of wealth (in the CJB)
  • Meditate (v. 15) = constant companion
  • Delight (v. 16)

When we delight in God’s Word, the cycle is started over again—I will not neglect Your Word—but now with a renewed and intensified PASSION!

I want God’s Word to dominate my thoughts, and its principles to captivate me. I want to be fascinated by my relationship with Jesus Christ that comes through the revelation of the Bible to my heart.

There is no other way to live!

If you have missed any of the messages in our P119 series, you can access them all by clicking here.

Savoring It

For those of you who asked, here is the quote I shared this morning from John Piper—

“If you don’t read the Word and memorize the Word and meditate on the Word daily and delight in the Word and savor it and have your mind and emotions shaped by the Word, you will be a weak Christian at best. You will be fragile and easily deceived and easily paralyzed by trouble and stuck in many mediocre ruts. But if you read the Word and memorize important parts of it and meditate on it and savor it and steep your mind in it, then you will be like a strong tree planted by streams of water that brings forth fruit. Your leaf won’t wither in the drought and you will be productive in your life for Christ.”

Heaven Is Rejoicing!

One of my all-time favorite things to do as a pastor is water baptism. I love hearing the stories of lives that have been completely transformed by Jesus Christ! This morning the Calvary Assembly of God family celebrated with Crystal as she made her public declaration that she is totally sold-out for God!