Is Confrontation A Dirty Word?

ConfrontationJesus takes the church of Thyatira to task because they are tolerating someone with a Jezebel spirit to remain in a position of leadership and influence (Revelation 2:18-29). This is still a message to the church today!

However, for some reason Christians have made “confrontation” a dirty word. We don’t confront people in error, especially those who are in leadership positions within their church. Perhaps equally as wrong: when we do confront, we do it in a way that is destructive.

The goal of confrontation is restoration, not destruction!

In Revelation 2, Jesus gives us five steps toward healthy, biblical, God-honoring confrontation:

  1. Don’t tolerate a Jezebel spirit by remaining silent (v. 20). Instead we need to follow the principles in Matthew 18:15-17 and 1 Timothy 5:19.
  2. Allow the one whom you’ve confronted time to repent (v. 21a).
  3. If they don’t repent, don’t rescue them from God-inflicted punishment (vv. 21b-23).
  4. Run away from secrets (v. 24). If something more than Scripture is required by the Jezebel leader, reject it.
  5. Don’t run away from the situation, but hold on to Jesus until Jesus returns (vv. 25-28).

Not one human is infallible, but Jezebel not only claims infallibility, but also demands blind allegiance to her teachings. But it is just as wrong to tolerate Jezebel as it is to confront her unbiblically; Jesus opposed both.

One way for us to always avoid these two extremes: Try to out-serve one another, just as Jesus directed us—

“You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave—just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life as a ransom for many.” (Matthew 20:25-28)

If you are near Cedar Springs next Sunday, please join me as we continue our series on The 7-Star Church.

Check out this clip about confrontation—

10 Quotes From “Grace”

Max Lucado’s newest book Grace is a wonderful reminder of how extravagant God is toward us (you can read my full review by clicking here). Here are 10 of my favorite quotes from Grace

“God’s guilt brings enough regret to change us. satan’s guilt, on the other hand, brings enough to enslave us. … It boils down to this choice: Do you trust your Advocate or your accuser?”

“Sin is not a regrettable lapse or an occasional stumble. Sin stages a coup against God’s regime. Sin storms the castle, lays claim to God’s throne, and defies His authority. Sin shouts, ‘I want to run my own life, thank you very much!’ Sin tells God to get out, get lost, and not come back. Sin is insurrection of the highest order, and you are an insurrectionist. So am I. So is every single person who has taken a breath. … God didn’t overlook your sins, lest He endorse them. He didn’t punish you, lest He destroy you. He instead found a way to punish the sin and preserve the sinner. Jesus took your punishment, and God gave you the credit for Jesus’ perfection.”

“Grace-a-lots believe in grace, a lot. Jesus almost finished the work of salvation, they argue. In a rowboat named Heaven Bound, Jesus paddles most of the time. But every so often He needs our help. So we give it. We accumulate good works the way Boy Scouts accumulate merit badges on a sash. … We find it easier to trust the miracle of resurrection than the miracle of grace. We so fear failure that we create the image of perfection, lest Heaven be even more disappointed in us than we are. The result? The weariest people on earth. Attempts at self-salvation guarantee nothing but exhaustion. We scamper and scurry, trying to please God, collecting merit badges and brownie points, and scowling at anyone who questions our accomplishments. Call us the church of hound-dog faces and slumped shoulders. Stop it! Once and for all, enough of this frenzy. ‘Your hearts should be strengthened by God’s grace, not by obeying rules’ (Hebrews 13:9 NCV). Jesus does not say, ‘Come to Me, all you who are perfect and sinless.’ Just the opposite. ‘Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest’ (Matthew 11:28 NASB).”

“Give the grace you’ve been given. You don’t endorse the deeds of your offender when you do. Jesus didn’t endorse your sins by forgiving you. Grace doesn’t tell the daughter to like the father who molested her. It doesn’t tell the oppressed to wink at injustice. The grace-defined person still sends thieves to jail and expects and ex to pay child support. Grace is not blind. It sees the hurt full well. But grace chooses to see God’s forgiveness even more. It refuses to let hurts poison the heart. ‘See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many’ (Hebrews 12:15 NIV). Where grace is lacking, bitterness abounds. Where grace abounds, forgiveness grows.

“Find a congregation that believes in confession. Avoid a fellowship of perfect people (you won’t fit in), but seek one where members confess their sins and show humility, where the price of admission is simply the admission of guilt. Healing happens in a church like this.”

“Plunge a sponge into Lake Erie. Did you absorb every drop? Take a deep breath. Did you suck the oxygen out of the atmosphere? Pluck a needle from a tree in Yosemite. Did you deplete the forest of foliage? Watch an ocean wave crash against the beach. Will there never be another one? Of course there will. No sooner will one wave crash into the sand than another appears. Then another, then another. This is a picture of God’s sufficient grace. Grace is simply another word for God’s tumbling, rumbling reservoir of strength and protection. It comes at us not occasionally or miserly but constantly and aggressively, wave upon wave. We’ve barely regained our balance from one breaker, and then, bam, here comes another. ‘Grace upon grace’ (John 1:16 NASB). We dare to hang our hat and stake our hope on the gladdest news of all: if God permits the challenge, He will provide the grace to meet it. We never exhaust His supply. ‘Stop asking so much! My grace reservoir is running dry.’ Heaven knows no such words. God has enough grace to solve every dilemma you face, wipe every tear you cry, and answer every question you ask.”

“How long has it been since your generosity stunned someone? Since someone objected, ‘No, really, this is too generous’? If it has been awhile, reconsider God’s extravagant grace. ‘Forget not all His benefits, who forgives all your iniquity’ (Psalm 103:2-3 RSV).”

“Your identity is not in your possessions, talents, tattoos, kudos, or accomplishments. Nor are you defined by your divorce, deficiencies, debt, or dumb choices. You are God’s child. You get to call Him ‘Papa.’ You ‘may approach God with freedom and confidence’ (Ephesians 3:12 NIV). You receive the blessings of His special love (1 John 4:9-11) and provision (Luke 11:11-13). And you will inherit the riches of Christ and reign with Him forever (Romans 8:17).”

“To live as God’s child is to know, at this very instant, that you are loved by your Maker not because you try to please Him and succeed, or fail to please Him and apologize, but because He wants to be your Father. Nothing more. All your efforts to win His affections are unnecessary. All your fears of losing His affection are needless. You can no more make Him want you than you can convince Him to abandon you. The adoption is irreversible. You have a place at His table.”

“Where there is no assurance of salvation, there is no peace. No peace means no joy. No joy results in fear-based lives. Is this the life God creates? No. Grace creates a confident soul who declares, ‘I know Whom I have believed, and am convinced that He is able to guard what I have entrusted to Him for that day’ (2 Timothy 1:12 NIV). … Trust God’s hold on you more than your hold on God. His faithfulness does not depend on Yours. His performance is not predicated on yours. His love is not contingent on your own.”

Thursdays With Oswald—Examination

This is a weekly series with things I’m reading and pondering from Oswald Chambers. You can read the original seed thought here, or type “Thursdays With Oswald” in the search box to read more entries.

Examination 

     Sin destroys the power of the soul to know its sin, punishment brings awakening, self-examination brings chastisement and saves the soul from sleeping sickness, and brings it into a healthy satisfaction. 

From Biblical Psychology

There’s so much to unpack in this single sentence…

  • We are very good at self-medicating away any pain (even spiritual pain), so that we never address the source of the pain (Ephesians 4:18).
  • I can be “sin sick” and not even know it because I’m not allowing the Holy Spirit to examine me (1 Corinthians 10:12).
  • The pain of punishment and chastisement is for my eternal benefit (Hebrews 12:5-11).

What do I need to do? Invite the examination of the Spirit:

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends You, and lead me along the path of everlasting life. (Psalm 139:23-24)

So let a person examine himself first, and then he may eat of the bread and drink from the cup; for a person who eats and drinks without recognizing the body eats and drinks judgment upon himself. This is why many among you are weak and sick, and some have died! If we would examine ourselves, we would not come under judgment. But when we are judged by the Lord, we are being disciplined, so that we will not be condemned along with the world. (1 Corinthians 11:28-32)

Thursdays With Oswald—Work-In-Progress

This is a weekly series with things I’m reading and pondering from Oswald Chambers. You can read the original seed thought here, or type “Thursdays With Oswald” in the search box to read more entries.

Work-In-Progress

     If you are a worker whom God has sent, and have learned to live under His shadow, you will find that scarcely a day goes by without your Father revealing the need of further chastening. If any child of God is free from the goads of God, he is not in the line of the succession of Jesus Christ.

From Approved Unto God

The writer of Hebrews said the same thing

And have you forgotten the encouraging words God spoke to you as His children? He said, “My child, don’t make light of the Lord’s discipline, and don’t give up when He corrects you. For the Lord disciplines those He loves, and He punishes each one He accepts as His child.”

It’s true: No pain, no gain. God will continue to work on you and me as His child.