The Refinement Of Pain

I was recently invited to join a bunch of guys—mostly staff in the Cedar Springs schools—for some early morning basketball. I love playing basketball, I’m a morning guy, and getting to know new people in Cedar Springs made this an invitation I couldn’t refuse. So I started hoopin’ this week. It was nice to get back on the hardwood floor!

Yesterday morning, I jumped in my car to come home to shower. It’s a mile from the school to my house, but by the time I got home, my back muscles had seized up and I was barely able to stand up to get out of the car. I’ve had this happen to me once before, and it’s a whole lot of no fun!

So all day yesterday my schedule had to be modified, as it hurt to move, it hurt to stand for too long, and it hurt to sit for too long. I couldn’t get in the car. In fact, I couldn’t even bend over far enough to put my own socks on! All my plans for the day were shot.

But here’s what I learned: my day wasn’t shot. My plans may not have worked out, but it was still a good day. Pain has a tendency to refine what’s really important out of all the trivial stuff.

  • A day in pain and immobility reminded me of just how blessed I am to normally have good health.
  • It prompted me to pray for others who are confined to a wheelchair or their beds.
  • It gave me greater empathy for those who live in chronic pain.
  • It made me more thankful that I have access to medicines and caregivers, things that some people have access to only rarely.
  • It let me see more clearly the love my family and friends have for me.
  • It gave me more time to pray.

Now here’s the tricky part: to live with these things on my mind even when I’m not in pain.

Here’s what C.S. Lewis wrote in The Problem Of Pain:

I am progressing along the path of life in my ordinary contentedly fallen and godless condition, absorbed in a merry meeting with my friends for the morrow or a bit of work that tickles my vanity today, a holiday or a new book, when suddenly a stab of abdominal [or back] pain that threatens serious disease, or a headline in the newspapers that threatens us all with destruction, send this whole pack of cards tumbling down. At first I am overwhelmed, and all my little happinesses look like broken toys. Then, slowly and reluctantly, bit by bit, I try to bring myself into the frame of mind that I should be in at all times. I remind myself that these toys were never intended to possess my heart, that my true good is in another world and my own real treasure is in Christ. And perhaps, by God’s grace, I succeed, and for a day or two become a creature consciously dependent on God and drawing strength from the right sources. But the moment the threat is withdrawn, my whole nature leaps back to the toys: I am even anxious, God forgive me, to banish from my mind the only thing that supported me under the threat because it is now associated with the misery of those few days. Thus the terrible necessity of tribulation is only too clear. God has had me for but forty-eight hours and then only by dint of taking everything else away from me. Let Him but sheathe that sword for a moment and I behave like a puppy when the hated bath is over—I shake myself as dry as I can and race off to reacquire my comfortable dirtiness, if not in the nearest manure heap, at least in the nearest flower bed. And that is why tribulations cannot cease until God either sees us remade or sees that our remaking is now hopeless.

With God’s help, I’m going to avoid running back to my “toys” today. I’m trying to keep the most important thing in the forefront of my thoughts today.

What lessons have you learned from pain?

Sleep: It Does A Family Good (book review)

I was reading Dr. Archibald Hart’s book Sleep: It Does A Family Good a few nights ago in the evening, and my oldest son looked over at me and snickered. “What?” I asked.

He said, “I just think it’s kinda funny that you are reading a book about sleep just before you go to sleep!” I smiled at his sense of humor and kept on reading Dr. Hart’s fascinating book. And the more I read, the more I discovered that reading just prior to bedtime was the perfect time to read, as Dr. Hart explains that what I put into my mind just before going to sleep gets sorted and stored in my brain’s long-term memory as I sleep.

That is IF I get enough sleep. Sadly, that’s the problem with most Americans: we are chronically tired. Not getting the proper amount of sleep adversely impacts our memory storage and recall, our work/school performance, our decision-making abilities, our coping skills, not to mention our physical health. Some students have even been misdiagnosed with disorders such as ADHD when in reality they are severely sleep-deprived.

Dr. Hart diagnoses the power of sleep in three sections:

  • Why sleep is so important
  • What’s keeping us from getting enough sleep
  • How we can reap the advantages of better sleep

This is a very straightforward read, with just enough evidence to convict me that I need to work on my sleeping habits, but not so technical that the information became overwhelming. Dr. Hart has an easy-to-read style that anyone can grasp, and he includes several charts and assessments to help you personally gauge where you and your family are on the sleep spectrum. Then he offers very practical steps on how to begin to make better investments in your family’s sleep bank.

Years ago a friend said to me, “Sometimes the most spiritually healthy thing I can do is go to bed early.” It took me a while to grasp what my friend was saying, but it all became so clear when I read Dr. Hart’s book. Sleep, as it turns out, really does do a family good! I’m looking forward to seeing how things in my family improve as we all get more sleep.

I am a book reviewer for Tyndale House Publishers.

An Extra Hour Of Sleep

I’m a morning person. I absolutely love getting up early and spending some quiet time alone with my Bible. This is the time of day I most absorb all that God is saying to me. It’s my most creative time too. In fact, I so love getting up early that most mornings I’m awake before my alarm clock goes off.

But not this morning.

Today my alarm clock began playing Way-FM and I felt like I was in a fog. It took me a minute or so to even open my eyes and sit up.

I was about to press ahead with my morning, when I thought, “I should sleep some more.”

You see, I’ve learned a few things about myself. When I’m tired…

  • I have a shorter attention span.
  • I’m not as creative.
  • I’m not as patient.
  • I am more prone to give in to temptation.
  • I make decisions that are too short-sighted.
  • I’m more susceptible to colds and flu.

So I re-set the alarm and slept another hour.

Sometimes a little extra sleep is one of the most important things you can do to improve your physical health, your emotional stamina, and your spiritual maturity.

UPDATE: In my book Shepherd Leadership: The Metrics That Really Matter I have five chapters about a leader’s health—mental, physical, spiritual, and emotional health is vital to a leader’s effectiveness and longevity.

Heart Healthy

Heart Matters

It’s amazing how many parallels there are between the health of our physical heart that pumps life-carrying blood and the health of our spiritual heart that circulates life to our inner man. I’m going to be exploring what makes a healthy heart (both kinds of heart) as we launch a new 6-part series this Sunday called Heart Matters.

Whether you are having heart trouble now, or you want to maintain a healthy heart for the years to come, this will be valuable insight for you. Join us at Calvary Assembly of God at 10:30am on Sunday mornings. It will be a great investment in your heart’s future.