mentoring | Craig T. Owens

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Now That I’m Old(er)

February 17, 2011 — Craig T. Owens

I love having the opportunity to speak to young(er) people. Especially now that I’m old(er), it gives me a chance to allow some of my hindsight to become someone else’s foresight. (That’s a fancy way of saying: I don’t want others to make the same mistakes I made!)

We’ve got a great group that meets at Calvary Assembly of God on Thursday evenings, called Unite. In addition to my short teaching time, there is also an open mic for local musicians (or poets, artists, comedians, etc.), a coffee bar, games, and lots of fun. If you are anywhere near Cedar Springs, come on out on Thursdays at 6:30pm.

Posted in Uncategorized. Tags: Calvary Assembly of God, mentoring, protege. 1 Comment »

They’re Both Dissin’

September 5, 2010 — Craig T. Owens

Check out these opening paragraphs from an article on WebMD (if you wish, you can read the full article here):

People over 50 get a self-esteem boost when they read negative news about young adults, a study shows.

Researchers also say young people, when given the choice, would rather read about people their own age and aren’t very interested in stories about their elders, whether the articles are positive or negative.

“Our results reflect that the younger readers did not perceive older people as all that relevant,” study researcher Silvia Knobloch-Westerwick, PhD, of Ohio State University, tells WebMD by email. “They’re more concerned with figuring out who they are and where they stand, and those in the same age group appear to provide the relevant comparisons for that.”

Okay, this disturbs me on several areas. Basically, each age group is dissin’ the other age group.

The senior citizens are projecting a snickering, see-I-told-you, father-knows-best, condescending attitude on youth. Why would anyone who is willing to learn and grow want to be around that kind of person?!

Then our youth have an I’ve-got-it-all-figured-out, I-don’t-need-you, you’re-out-of-touch attitude toward the senior citizens. Why would anyone who is willing to mentor someone ever want to be that kind of person?!

I think both of these generational groups could learn from this wise advice:

Children, do what your parents tell you. This is only right. “Honor your father and mother” is the first commandment that has a promise attached to it, namely, “so you will live well and have a long life.” Fathers, don’t exasperate your children by coming down hard on them. Take them by the hand and lead them in the way of the Master.

Posted in Uncategorized. Tags: children, disrespect, Ephesians, kids, learning, mentoring, parenting, respect, senior citizens, WebMD, youth. Leave a Comment »

The Importance Of Purity

December 4, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

Yesterday I read the Family Resource Council’s report about the devastating effects of pornography. Some highlights (or should I say “lowlights”?):

Married men who are involved in pornography feel less satisfied with their conjugal relations and less emotionally attached to their wives.
Pornography use is a pathway to infidelity and divorce and is frequently a major factor in these family disasters.
Pornography viewing leads to a loss of interest in good family relations.
Pornography is addictive.
Men who view pornography regularly have a higher tolerance for abnormal sexuality, including rape, sexual aggression, and sexual promiscuity.
Prolonged consumption of pornography by men produces stronger notions of women as commodities or as “sex objects.”
Child-sex offenders are more likely to view pornography regularly or to be involved in its distribution.

This is the reason my wife and I stress purity so highly with our children. Betsy is going through Every Young Woman’s Battle with our daughter, and I’m using Every Young Man’s Battle with our sons.

There are only two battles that Scripture consistently warns us to flee from: idolatry and sexual promiscuity. We cannot stress purity enough, and it’s never too early (or too late) to talk to your kids about this.

Hey, parents, don’t let their peers have the loudest voice in your kids’ ears about sexual standards. You help them set godly standards. And do it now.

Posted in Uncategorized. Tags: 1 Corinthians, divorce, education, husband, idolatry, marriage, mentoring, pornography, sexual purity, sexual sin, training, wife. Leave a Comment »

Respected Mentor

November 18, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

Last week I was listening to an interview with former Indianapolis coach Tony Dungy on the Catalyst podcast. In this interview, he had some amazing things to say about his relationship with Michael Vick.

Then this evening I opened up the latest issue of Sports Spectrum, and in the opening article, I read some more about the relationship between Coach Dungy and Vick.

In his Catalyst interview Coach Dungy said, “I felt like I let Michael down. Our schedules never coordinated for us to spend a day fishing. If I would have been able to spend a day with him, perhaps it would have come up in conversation about some of the poor decisions he was making. If I had the time to spend with him, maybe I could have given him some counsel that would have helped him make a different decision.” Wow!

Then Sports Spectrum reports that NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell allowed Michael Vick to be reinstated into the league only on the condition that Tony Dungy would be Vick’s mentor. “Michael needs that right now,” Goodell said, “And I’ve asked Tony Dungy to play a more formal role on my behalf, but also on Michael’s behalf, to serve as a mentor to Michael and help him and guide him through some very difficult decisions he’s going to have to make going forward.”

So I’m thinking…

Would I put my reputation on the line for someone like Michael Vick? Would you?
Would someone even think to ask me to be his mentor?

I hope that you and I are both willing to mentor others, and that others will give us the chance to do so.

Posted in Uncategorized. Tags: mentoring, Michael Vick, NFL, quote, relationships, Roger Goodell, Tony Dungy. 1 Comment »

Life Lessons From College Football

October 26, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

Tebow & Meyer

Football is hands-down my favorite sport. I love watching coaches strategizing with their teams, and players executing so precisely the plays they have practiced over and over again. I love the emotional highs and lows I feel after great plays for and against my team.

Over the past couple of years, I have thoroughly enjoyed watching three premier college quarterbacks that are not only great players but great men too: Colt McCoy at Texas, Sam Bradford at Oklahoma, and Tim Tebow at Florida.

Saturday, in his game against Mississippi State, Tim Tebow had a rough outing. Twice he was intercepted. And if that wasn’t bad enough, both of the interceptions were returned for touchdowns. Ouch!

But then after the game, his coach Urban Meyer made an amazing statement. When asked about the interceptions he said, “I put Tim in a bad position. He shouldn’t have had to make those throws.”

This really got me thinking about the coaching I do with my own kids. Do I put them in a position where they can be successful? Do I put them in places where their strengths can come into play? Do I try my best to keep them out of positions where their weaknesses could overwhelm their strengths?

Obviously, Urban Meyer did not throw those interceptions; Tim Tebow did. But Coach Meyer took responsibility, saying, “As a coach, it’s my job to put my players in a place to be successful.” This is what I’m striving for: not yelling at my kids for their “interceptions” but looking first at my coaching skills. I want to set up my kids to be winners.

Posted in Uncategorized. Tags: coaching, Colt McCoy, mentoring, NCAA Football, Sam Bradford, Tim Tebow, Urban Meyer. Leave a Comment »

Dinner That’s More Than Dinner

October 2, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

The apostles returned to Jesus from their ministry tour and told Him all they had done and taught. Then Jesus said, “Let’s go off by ourselves to a quiet place and rest awhile.” He said this because there were so many people coming and going that Jesus and His apostles didn’t even have time to eat. So they left by boat for a quiet place, where they could be alone. (Mark 6:30-32 NLT)

Sometimes dinner is more than dinner. It’s not just food for our physical bodies; it can be so much more.

The apostles returned from their first ministry assignment. They were so excited to come back and tell Jesus how incredible their time had been. They breathlessly rushed into the house where Jesus was waiting for them. “Master,” Peter started, “You should have seen how Andrew…” and he was cut short by a new visitor.

Next James tried, “Whoa, it was so cool when we…” and yet another distraction.

Time and time again their stories and questions and concerns were interrupted by the busyness of life and ministry. In fact, it got so chaotic that the disciples couldn’t even eat their food, except in quick gulps between visitors.

Finally, Jesus said, “Guys, let’s get out of here. I really want to hear about your ministry. I want to debrief a little with you. And, frankly, we’re all hungry and could use a quiet dinner. Let’s go someplace to hang out together.” Now that’s more than a dinner!

Check out the advantages of simply eating together:

Families who eat dinner together eat healthier.
Families who eat dinner together have higher communication skills.
Children in families who eat dinner together perform better academically.
Children in families who eat dinner together are less likely to try cigarettes, illegal drugs, or alcohol.

I love our family mealtimes—it is one of the best times to catch up on what’s happening with everyone. Last night we were joined at dinner by a young couple from our church. After dinner, the kids were off playing and Betsy and I could have a quiet conversation just with our friends. We talked about the newlyweds’ adjustment to marriage, what makes a good church, education, career, china patterns, and the way God speaks to us. We laughed and dreamed and talked about dreams. It was fantastic!

Turn off the TV. Make a healthy dinner. Set aside time to eat with family and friends. Jesus gave us a great example: “C’mon, friends, I really want to spend some quiet time with you.”

So here’s to dinners that are more than dinners.

Posted in Uncategorized. Tags: academic excellence, dinner, eat healthy, family, fellowship, friends, friendship, Gospel of Mark, Jesus Christ, mentoring, parenting, peer pressure, relationships. 3 Comments »

Investing Appointments

September 4, 2009 — Craig T. Owens

Here are a few definitions of investing from the dictionary:

To commit (money or capital) in order to gain a financial return
To devote for future advantage or benefit
To devote morally or psychologically, as to a purpose
To endow with authority or power

Commit … devote … endow. These are not half-hearted words. For an investment to be successful (that is, for it to give a good return on investment), the investor must be fully involved. No half-measures will do.

I try to always remember this when I’m accepting or making an appointment to meet with someone. This is a person with great worth, and I want to invest my time, energy, emotions, and knowledge into someone that is going to yield a great return for the Kingdom of God.

I know that with some people it’ll just be a spending appointment. That’s okay. Sometimes you have to spend a little before there is an investment opportunity. But what I love is identifying those people who have an attitude to grow. In those people, I willingly and wholeheartedly make an investing appointment.

By the way, all of these definitions for invest come from the same root word. The original meaning was “the clothing of someone else.” In other words, I must be willing to take all that I have to complete someone else if I want the investment to be successful.

I’m grateful for the people who have invested in me. The return on their investment is showing up in the investments I have the privilege of making now. I’m blessed to be pouring all of me into some great leaders-in-training.

Before you schedule that next appointment, ask yourself, “Am I just going to be spending my time, or is this someone in whom I can invest.” Be careful about only putting spending appointments on your calendar. And when you do have a chance for an investing appointment, be sure you go all in.