How Betsy Made A Memorable First Impression

I keep urging my wife to start a blog of her own because she has some wonderful insights (yeah, yeah, I know I’m biased!). She wrote a note on her Facebook page this morning that’s just too good not to pass along to everyone…

Okay so let’s begin.

Last night Craig was speaking at a church for the purpose of evaluating whether or not it would be a good fit for us to pastor. So, just before the service began I ran to the ladies room. It was occupied and I had to wait quite awhile until it was available. By that time, service had already begun. I naturally hurried to get back into service.

Upon entering the sanctuary, Craig was in the middle of praying. I didn’t want to walk up front while he was praying, so I remained in the back until he was finished. I then very gracefully proceeded to the front pew to take my seat.

As is my natural custom, before sitting down, I always smooth out the back of my skirt to avoid unnecessary wrinkles. Upon doing this, I discovered that my skirt was ever so daintily tucked inside my underwear. Yes, it’s true.

My first response was embarrassment, then total mortification, then complete laughter. I was silently laughing for several moments in the front pew. Craig finally leaned over to ask me what was going on. I told him about the situation and he said, “It’s a sign, this can’t be the right place.”

I really don’t know if anyone saw or not, I’m guessing someone did. Thankfully there were no comments to me.

So… I’m telling you, if you want to create a memorable impression this is one way to do it — however, I don’t recommend it.

What do you think? Good first impression? Was this indeed a “sign” for us? And, more importantly, don’t you think Betsy ought to start blogging?

Thanksgiving Prep

Hopefully this will help you get ready for your big day on Thursday. Enjoy!

Books & Chocolate & Friends & Food & Smiles

I celebrated another year of being alive this past weekend. What a wonderful weekend it was!

I received two of my favorite gifts (and lots of them): books and dark chocolate.

We had an incredible service on Sunday, with some old friends back visiting and some first-time guests too.

Someone slipped Betsy a little money to take me out to dinner for my birthday, and we had a great afternoon together.

And our service was interrupted by my incredible congregation singing happy birthday to me and delivering to me a whole stack of birthday cards. The cards have been cracking me up all week! Let me share a couple with you—

Look who’s turning 2! Who’s cuddly? Who’s snuggly? Who’s cute as can be? Who’s perfect? Who’s precious? Who’s 2? You (Yippee)!

Couldn’t afford to get you a wireless computer for your birthday, but I got you the next best thing! A computerless wire! (Hey, don’t thank me, that’s what friends are for!)

Thought you’d like a funny card for your birthday, but what I think is funny and what you think is funny may be very different. For instance—I think this is funny [and below is a mirror].

Ah, yes, it was a great birthday. I feel the love. Truly!

Very Punny

Laughter is good medicine.

It’s been called “inner jogging.”

It’s been shown to boost your immune system.

It’s an immediate mood lifter.

And we don’t get enough of it.

Studies say that on average, an adult laughs 15 times a day; a child laughs 400 times a day. No wonder kids have a better outlook on life than most adults!

I like humor that makes you think as well as tickles your funny bone. The dictionary defines a pun as “the humorous use of a word or phrase so as to emphasize or suggest its different meanings or applications, or the use of words that are alike or nearly alike in sound but different in meaning; a play on words.”

Here are a few puns to make you giggle. I’d love to laugh at some of yours too, so please share them in the comments.

  • A man’s home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.
  • Dijon vu—the same mustard as before.
  • Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.
  • A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
  • Sea captains don’t like crew cuts.
  • Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
  • Don’t let worries get the best of you, remember, Moses started out as a basket case.
  • Forbidden fruits create many jams.
  • Reading while sunbathing makes you well-red.
  • When two egotists meet, it’s an I for an I.
  • A bicycle can’t stand on its own because it is two-tired.
  • What’s the definition of a will? (Come on, it’s a dead giveaway!)
  • Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
  • A backward poet writes inverse.
  • The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.
  • Many church members who sing “Standing on the Promises” are really sitting on the premises.
  • You feel stuck with your debt if you can’t budge it.
  • He often broke into song because he couldn’t find the key.
  • Every calendar’s days are numbered.
  • A lot of money is tainted. It taint yours and it taint mine.
  • A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.
  • Once you’ve seen one shopping center, you’ve seen a mall.
  • When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she’d dye.
  • Acupuncture is a jab well done.
  • If you want a better life, altar it.

Go ahead, laugh! As the Norwegian Proverb says, “He who laughs—lasts.”

Momisms

There are things that all moms say. And we’ve all heard these “momisms”—

  • Were you raised in a barn? Close the door!
  • If I’ve told you once I’ve told you a thousand times….
  • If you keep doing that your face will stick like that.
  • Eat your vegetables.
  • Drink your milk.
  • Do your homework.
  • Don’t sit so close to the TV or you’ll go blind.
  • Turn the music down or you’ll go deaf.
  • Look at me when I’m talking to you!
  • Don’t give me that look!
  • I love you!

Anita Renfroe captured some great momisms in her song that recounts everything a mom says in a 24-hour period.

But I’m wondering what your mom said that no other kids’ mom said. Use the comment section to share your favorite momisms.

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