Very Punny

Laughter is good medicine.

It’s been called “inner jogging.”

It’s been shown to boost your immune system.

It’s an immediate mood lifter.

And we don’t get enough of it.

Studies say that on average, an adult laughs 15 times a day; a child laughs 400 times a day. No wonder kids have a better outlook on life than most adults!

I like humor that makes you think as well as tickles your funny bone. The dictionary defines a pun as “the humorous use of a word or phrase so as to emphasize or suggest its different meanings or applications, or the use of words that are alike or nearly alike in sound but different in meaning; a play on words.”

Here are a few puns to make you giggle. I’d love to laugh at some of yours too, so please share them in the comments.

  • A man’s home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.
  • Dijon vu—the same mustard as before.
  • Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.
  • A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
  • Sea captains don’t like crew cuts.
  • Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
  • Don’t let worries get the best of you, remember, Moses started out as a basket case.
  • Forbidden fruits create many jams.
  • Reading while sunbathing makes you well-red.
  • When two egotists meet, it’s an I for an I.
  • A bicycle can’t stand on its own because it is two-tired.
  • What’s the definition of a will? (Come on, it’s a dead giveaway!)
  • Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
  • A backward poet writes inverse.
  • The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.
  • Many church members who sing “Standing on the Promises” are really sitting on the premises.
  • You feel stuck with your debt if you can’t budge it.
  • He often broke into song because he couldn’t find the key.
  • Every calendar’s days are numbered.
  • A lot of money is tainted. It taint yours and it taint mine.
  • A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.
  • Once you’ve seen one shopping center, you’ve seen a mall.
  • When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she’d dye.
  • Acupuncture is a jab well done.
  • If you want a better life, altar it.

Go ahead, laugh! As the Norwegian Proverb says, “He who laughs—lasts.”

5 Responses to “Very Punny”

  1. Davis Says:

    especially liked the “poet inverse” one — thanks for the laughs (guffaws, really)


  2. Samantha Says:

    Very funny!!!! I don’t have any good puns, but oviously you do!! =) =D


  3. panhead Says:

    “Two guys walked into a bar… the third guy ducked.” Not exactly a pun but still a funny play on words.


  4. Kelly L. Mosher Says:

    Thanks!! I needed this! I lol lots!


  5. Rich Tolar Says:

    hey this is really cool, it was a good thing to read to start my day out with.
    my favorite one was, “need a new life? altar it.” =]


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