Life On Life

In my remarks at the funeral in which I was officiating on Wednesday, I quoted the great Green Bay Packers coach Vince Lombardi. He was reportedly addressing a couple of under-performing players when he said, “When all’s said and done, usually more is said than done.” In other words, don’t talk about what you’re going to do, just do it.

One of my passions is to mentor and equip other people to do great things. I’ve found that the best way to do this is not to just talk about what they should be doing, but to step into their life and do those things with them—to do more than I say.

This life-on-life mentoring is challenging but so incredibly rewarding. The Apostle Paul wrote, “Follow me as I follow Christ. C’mon, let’s pursue this relationship with Jesus together. I’m going to keep you close to me so that you can look in on what I’m doing, and I’m going to be right here for you too. Let’s draw closer to Jesus together” (see 1 Corinthians 11:1)

I love the one-on-one times with my kids … brainstorming with the young leaders-in-training at church … having challenging conversations with an accountability friend … opening our home to a young single mom. These interactions keep me focused on staying as close to Christ as I can. Because if I lose sight of Him, so might the others who are connected with me life-on-life.

It’s pretty hard to say, “Follow me while I do my own thing.” So I’m redoubling my efforts to stay close to the Master today.

I Like People With Less

You would probably think that if I needed counsel or advice I would seek out someone who is well educated in the area I need help. I should probably find an expert in the matter that’s troubling me. It seems somewhat counterintuitive, but I am finding that those who know less can actually help me more.

Listen to C.S. Lewis, “The fellow-pupil can help more than the master because he knows less. The difficulty we want him to explain is one he has recently met.” He can help me more because he knows less.

I know this tends to be true when one of my children asks me to help them with something in their homework, or a friend asks my help on a computer problem she is experiencing. Because I have already worked out the steps, I no longer have to proceed sequentially; that is, I don’t have to go from Step A to Step B to Step C, and so on until I get to the answer. Because of my past experience, I can jump right to Step K.

Great for me. Totally unhelpful to those asking for my advice. In essence, I’m doing all of their thinking for them. I haven’t taught them anything, except that I’ll do their work for them.

Lately, I’ve been spending quite a bit of time with a friend who is thinking about what it means to have a relationship with Jesus. He has very, very little church background, so I have been forced to go back to Step A with him, because Steps K, L, M, and the like would make no sense to him.

This is why I love being around the unchurched, the dechurched, and the never-churched. This is why I love talking to and listening to teenagers and 20-somethings who are new to their relationship with Jesus. These fellow pupils are so recently going through situations that it really makes me pause to go back to my beginnings.

Try it yourself. There is some great wisdom in those who have “been there done that.” But I’m also getting some great insights from those who are “here now doing this.”

Saturdays At Panera

“A mentor has been defined as someone whose hindsight can become your foresight.” —Richard Edler

For almost three years I have had the privilege of being mentored by Hank Zampa. Once a month we meet at Panera and Hank pours into my life. Sometimes he simply lets me unpack my frustrations, sometimes he asks me challenging questions that cause me to rethink my current strategy, sometimes he gives me a word of encouragement or a book to read. His hindsight has been my foresight time and time again, and I am a better man because of that. And all of this came about because I simply recognized the need for a wise man to speak into my life, and I asked Hank if he would be willing to invest in me. I am so grateful he said “yes.”

Who are you allowing to speak into your life?