When Work & Family Collide is a timely message in our busy, go-go-go world. It’s hard to keep everyone in our lives happy when we are so busy. As author Andy Stanley says, “The issue is never ‘Am I cheating?’ The issue is always ‘Where am I cheating?’” You can read my complete book review by clicking here.
These are six of my favorite quotes from this book:
“Let me take some pressure off. Your problem is not discipline. Your problem is not organization. Your problem is not that you have yet to stumble upon the perfect schedule. And your problem is not that the folks at home demand too much of your time. The problem is this: there’s not enough time to get everything done that you’re convinced—or others have convinced you—needs to get done.”
“Over time, our families learn that the only way to get our attention is to create a crisis. And let’s face it; it’s amazing how much time we can steal from work when our kids are in crisis. …Instead of allowing the most recent crisis to force the issue, why not be governed by the greater purpose? Why not ‘cheat’ by design?”
“Whereas work is task focused, the family is relationship focused. One is about doing, while the other is about loving. …You do your job. You love your family. It’s when we reverse the order that the tension escalates and the tug of war begins.”
“[Your family] wants to feel like your priority. It’s not enough for them to be your priority. They must feel like it.”
“Whenever you compromise the interests of a family member in order to fill gaps somewhere else you shuffle your priorities. Loyalty that was intended for a loved one gets displaced and given to someone else. However small, it increases the emotional load he or she must carry. It may not seem like a big deal. But it sends the message: You’re important… but right now someone else is more important.”
“It’s up to us to monitor the emotional weight being carried by each of our family members. Through honest, and sometimes awkward, communication we can learn to monitor the hearts of our loved ones.”
Craig T. Owens 
July 9, 2012 at 6:47 am
This post spoke to me deeply, coming from a 28 year career in the restaurant biz. Even though I always ‘thought’ my family was my highest priority, the pressures of the professional kitchen seemed to always have the upper hand… Until it nearly helped cause real destruction in my family that I love so much. I’m gonna need to get this book!
LikeLike